Is this rude of me?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sometimes when our nanny arrives, I'm home, but in the middle of something (I work from home) so I don't go and say hello. She has our housekey so let's herself in and I leave instructions for her on the kitchen table. She picks DC up from preschool so it's not like I have to officially hand DC off or anything. I'm home all day but sometimes don't say hello to her until the evening. If you were a nanny, would you consider this rude?

YEs!,yes,yes,I just left my family because that,I can't handle this mean things...

[Anonymous]

I also work from home and when I am in my office, I am just that "at the office". It is an important separation. I also have the added benefit that my office is removed from the rest of the house so I don't always hear people coming and going. When she was preschool age I also had to hide a bit from dd. She didn't really understand why mommy was off limits

I think a good balance would be to make an effort to say hi to the nanny when you grab a cup of coffee

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There has to be one or two bitter, unprofessional nannies replying multiple times to threads lately, these responses are just too much.

No OP, it is not rude. The nanny hasn't "turned up to help you", you do not need to give her face-to-face instructions everyday (seriously, any other thread and the nannies would be up your a$$ for micromanaging), you are not self-important just because you don't leave your work day to disrupt your child's routine daily to say "hello".

Don't we hear all the time on here that WAH parents need to be never seen nor heard? Yet when the opportunity to bash an employer comes up, the harpies are poised with every insult they can think of?

Like PP stated, it would not occur to most rational adults to be offended, let alone notice, your lack of daily greeting.

This is OP. Thanks to everyone for their replies and PP, you hit the nail on the head with my situation. It would be disruptive to my work most days for me to stop in the middle of what I'm doing to say hello to the nanny. And I also was under the general impression that as a WAHM, I should stay out of the way, which in our situation makes sense as well as DC goes nuts if I'm around. I will mention to nanny that I can't always say hello at the start of her day so she knows I don't mean to be rude. Thanks again!

[Anonymous]

I am a nanny. My initial reaction to your question is to say, yes, that seems rude to not say hi. However, since your nanny has the preschooler with her, I can also see the scenario where preschooler hears mom's voice and then gets upset that mommy is doing something else besides admiring the child.

So . . I guess it depends. Depends on how sensitive the child is, and how sensitive the nanny is.

[Anonymous]

I don't think its rude and I am a nanny. if you're busy you are busy. It wouldn't be any different if you were working somewhere else and I come by every morning to do certain things before I head off to get the kid from school.

I mean you are officially at work, who cares? Its not because you don't like her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a nanny. My initial reaction to your question is to say, yes, that seems rude to not say hi. However, since your nanny has the preschooler with her, I can also see the scenario where preschooler hears mom's voice and then gets upset that mommy is doing something else besides admiring the child.

So . . I guess it depends. Depends on how sensitive the child is, and how sensitive the nanny is.

PP here

oh I assumed she was not speaking when the nanny was coming in alone before she goes to get the child. But if the kid is already with her then it makes even more since to remain mum and not make your presence know to the child. I would really appreciate that. Its been my experience that parents working from home on certain occasions throw things off drastically schedule wise when they speak and make the child aware they are home. Then the child start behaving differently and trying to come up with reasons to go see them etc

[Anonymous]

*sense* Not since lol

-pp again

[Anonymous]

I am no longer a nanny but I was a full time nanny for 10+ years and this wouldn't bother me. Maybe when I was younger it may have, maybe. But I probably would have enjoyed not having to chit chat about my MB's random lame work or what she was planning to buy during her shopping day.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't personally be upset if I were the nanny, but different folks, different strokes, and all that.

Mornings are really tough - i try to make small talk with my nanny but many times I have to rush out as she's coming in. Still there's always time to say "hiSooorryHe'sStillSleepingBreakfastIsByToasterHav'GoodDay!"

(The above holds nless you're trying to avoid upsetting the child. In any case, you could just ask her or explain you don't mean to be rude, but sometimes in the mornings, you just can't stop what you're doing at the moment she comes in.)

[Anonymous]

Yea if you see her it's definitely rude

[Anonymous]

Nanny here. I don't think that's rude at all. It would be rude if she came in the room you're in and you ignored her, but if you're in a different part of the house? Totally fine. But it's a good idea to tell her sorry you can't always say hello to her yada yada yada.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sometimes when our nanny arrives, I'm home, but in the middle of something (I work from home) so I don't go and say hello. She has our housekey so let's herself in and I leave instructions for her on the kitchen table. She picks DC up from preschool so it's not like I have to officially hand DC off or anything. I'm home all day but sometimes don't say hello to her until the evening. If you were a nanny, would you consider this rude?

Um, nanny here. If you did interrupt every day to say hi to me, you'd probably be interrupting your child and me later. Please don't do either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sometimes when our nanny arrives, I'm home, but in the middle of something (I work from home) so I don't go and say hello. She has our housekey so let's herself in and I leave instructions for her on the kitchen table. She picks DC up from preschool so it's not like I have to officially hand DC off or anything. I'm home all day but sometimes don't say hello to her until the evening. If you were a nanny, would you consider this rude?

YEs!,yes,yes,I just left my family because that,I can't handle this mean things...

No one believes any quality employer employs you anyways

[Anonymous]

I'm a nanny, no it's not rude.

You're doing things, shouldn't need to stop what you are doing every single morning. As long as you are friendly when you do see her, a quick hello will work.

[Anonymous]

MB. Yes I think it's rude.