MB expects me to contribute money to work trip

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I haven't had a chance to email Mb, but will let you know what happens. My contract states that I have 10 days of vacation and can use it as I see fit.
I've always broken it up into 2 weeklong vacations (1 to my home state and 1 to DH's home state). Like I said before, I am absolutely flabbergasted by this. My bosses have always been extremely fair and generous in terms of pay and flexibility. I really don't think she's being malicious. I think she doesn't know what the customary thing to do is.
She sees it as a fun trip to the beach for me. I will more than likely be working more than 25 hours. Between, the rehearsal dinner, wedding events and the wedding itself (MB and DB are in the wedding), I think I will easily work 25 hours. This doesn't count beach trips (where they'll probably be drinking and I'll be charged with the children's care) and dinners out by themselves, etc.- I think I'm going to be working significantly more than 25.
I really don't mind sharing a room with my charge, but only if I'm being paid my weekly salary. I'll keep you all posted.
Thanks everyone!

Plus, you know you will be saddled with all the other kids too. You will probably work the whole time.

[Anonymous]

Wow. After three years of superior service, she is actually asking you this?? I think this is very inconsiderate of her to actually ask you to contribute financially to this "working" vacation, esp. since you will be sharing your sleep space with a young child.

Since you are supposed to receive guaranteed hours, it would be preferable for you to just stay home and let them go ahead. And you should be paid for it as well.

However I highly doubt that your boss will go for such an idea, so this is how I would approach her.

Since this is a working trip, you expect to have your transportation, lodging and meals provided along with an hourly salary. And the fact that you have to share a bedroom with one of your charges constitutes actually working since if he awakes during the night, you will most likely be the one tending to him.

Plus it's not like you can go to sleep whenever you feel like it as well as sleep in and lounge in bed in the morning.

As soon as your charge wakes up, then you will have to as well.

I would address this issue sooner rather than later because promise me...IF you do not, by the time August arrives, you will be very bitter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My MB asked me to accompany them to the beach next August to help with my 2 charges (will be 1 and 4 next summer).
While thinking about it, I thought that I would only expect my regular pay, as I've been with them for 3 years and we have a great relationship.
My NF is renting a house on the beach with MB's parents, her 2 siblings and their girlfriends.
MB emailed me this morning about the trip. She said that since I would only be working about 25 hours (I normally work 45), she would expect to wave my weekly salary and only charge me $150 for my portion of the house rental!?!?
I am absolutely shocked. I don't even want to go on this stupid trip, but agreed to it because I like to be flexible to them.
I don't even know how to respond to this nonsense. I won't even have my own room. I'll be sharing with my 4 yo charge.
How the hell do I respond to her? I have guaranteed hours, BTW.

1. If you share a room with a child, you are working every hour that you are in the room with the child. This is per Wage and Hour and the IRS. If you need a link, I'll find it again.
2. You have guaranteed hours, you will receive your normal weekly pay or she can find a new nanny and deal with a small claims case.
3. A working trip means that you pay nothing.

[Anonymous]

OP here. I talked to MB when she came home tonight.
I let her know that while I appreciate her offer, I don't have a vacation in my budget. I also said that I can't forfeit a paycheck to "go on vacation" and would have to decline. She seemed a little perplexed and kept pushing me with "but it will be such a fun trip for you!" I finally had to tell her that it is customary to pay for all lodging, food and the regular wage. I told her that this would be a working "vacation" for me and not a true vacation.
I left work and got an email from DB. He said that he would certainly pay for all of my lodging, food and would pay my regular rate. He said that she got a little confused on how it's supposed to work. 10 minutes after that DB's mom called me. She and I get along famously and I consider her a friend. She also doesn't care for MB 100%. She said that MB "must be out of her damn mind" to have suggested such a thing.
I suspect that MB has suffered from PPD, which may have something to do with it. She's had a bit of a difficult time since my youngest charge was born. As far as sharing a room with my charge...I honestly don't mind! I've cared for him since he was 8 weeks old. He's my little buddy and a great sleeper. It wouldn't bother me a bit to comfort him if he needs it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I talked to MB when she came home tonight.
I let her know that while I appreciate her offer, I don't have a vacation in my budget. I also said that I can't forfeit a paycheck to "go on vacation" and would have to decline. She seemed a little perplexed and kept pushing me with "but it will be such a fun trip for you!" I finally had to tell her that it is customary to pay for all lodging, food and the regular wage. I told her that this would be a working "vacation" for me and not a true vacation.
I left work and got an email from DB. He said that he would certainly pay for all of my lodging, food and would pay my regular rate. He said that she got a little confused on how it's supposed to work. 10 minutes after that DB's mom called me. She and I get along famously and I consider her a friend. She also doesn't care for MB 100%. She said that MB "must be out of her damn mind" to have suggested such a thing.
I suspect that MB has suffered from PPD, which may have something to do with it. She's had a bit of a difficult time since my youngest charge was born. As far as sharing a room with my charge...I honestly don't mind! I've cared for him since he was 8 weeks old. He's my little buddy and a great sleeper. It wouldn't bother me a bit to comfort him if he needs it.

I'm glad you were able to resolve this. I hope you have a great trip, get a little down time while WORKING in a different location, and DB comes through on his word to you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would say what you said here: that there has been a misunderstanding. You agreed to go for work, not as a vacation for you, and that you'll have to bow out of the trip.

I suspect once she realizes she'll have to pay you on top of everything else once you're not going, she'll change her tune.

Agreed. If you have guaranteed hours than why would you agree to not only losyong a week of pay but paying an additional $150??? You are much better off staying home, enjoying a week off and getting paid your regular rate.

[Anonymous]

Wedding? What wedding? You didn't mention this in your initial post. PPD? Besties with DB's mother? Who can magically make it all work out for you?

Yeah. Right.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wedding? What wedding? You didn't mention this in your initial post. PPD? Besties with DB's mother? Who can magically make it all work out for you?

Yeah. Right.

Huh? It's MB's sister. They're getting married in Charleston this summer. I'm not exactly sure why that is hard to believe, but ok.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I talked to MB when she came home tonight.
I let her know that while I appreciate her offer, I don't have a vacation in my budget. I also said that I can't forfeit a paycheck to "go on vacation" and would have to decline. She seemed a little perplexed and kept pushing me with "but it will be such a fun trip for you!" I finally had to tell her that it is customary to pay for all lodging, food and the regular wage. I told her that this would be a working "vacation" for me and not a true vacation.
I left work and got an email from DB. He said that he would certainly pay for all of my lodging, food and would pay my regular rate. He said that she got a little confused on how it's supposed to work. 10 minutes after that DB's mom called me. She and I get along famously and I consider her a friend. She also doesn't care for MB 100%. She said that MB "must be out of her damn mind" to have suggested such a thing.
I suspect that MB has suffered from PPD, which may have something to do with it. She's had a bit of a difficult time since my youngest charge was born. As far as sharing a room with my charge...I honestly don't mind! I've cared for him since he was 8 weeks old. He's my little buddy and a great sleeper. It wouldn't bother me a bit to comfort him if he needs it.

15.54. Glad it worked out.

[Anonymous]

WOW! You should absolutely be paid for the whole week. What if you didn't go? Would they still pay you? They should.

Crazy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I talked to MB when she came home tonight.
I let her know that while I appreciate her offer, I don't have a vacation in my budget. I also said that I can't forfeit a paycheck to "go on vacation" and would have to decline. She seemed a little perplexed and kept pushing me with "but it will be such a fun trip for you!" I finally had to tell her that it is customary to pay for all lodging, food and the regular wage. I told her that this would be a working "vacation" for me and not a true vacation.
I left work and got an email from DB. He said that he would certainly pay for all of my lodging, food and would pay my regular rate. He said that she got a little confused on how it's supposed to work. 10 minutes after that DB's mom called me. She and I get along famously and I consider her a friend. She also doesn't care for MB 100%. She said that MB "must be out of her damn mind" to have suggested such a thing.
I suspect that MB has suffered from PPD, which may have something to do with it. She's had a bit of a difficult time since my youngest charge was born. As far as sharing a room with my charge...I honestly don't mind! I've cared for him since he was 8 weeks old. He's my little buddy and a great sleeper. It wouldn't bother me a bit to comfort him if he needs it.

15.54. Glad it worked out.

Me too! But don't get in between the MB and her MIL. You will be the big loser if you do...