Looking for Christian au pairs

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:With APIA we've also seen some German girls that list heavy involvement with churches in their experience - they seem to be from southern Germany, so the more Catholic parts of Bavaria. Due to past personal baggage with a rematch from that area we don't recruit from that area (totally only a personal issue for our family) but it may work out great for you.

As a PP wrote, just listing going to church a lot doesn't necessarily mean anything in some parts of the world. Our past two APs and upcoming one all listed weekly attendance at their Catholic churches, but when probed, none had any real commitment to the religion; their involvement was very social. This actually was important to us - we DON'T want religious APs because we aren't religious at all - and specifically we do not agree with many of the preachings of the Catholic church on things like gay marriage, abortion, and questions of gender equity, so someone who was very firmly a believer in the Church's preachings wouldn't be a good fit for our family. My recommendation to OP is to ask lots of questions about faith and include something in the "dear AP" letter about the importance of faith and Christian beliefs, so that she can be clear for APs and prompt them to be clear for her whether their weekly attendance actually MEANS anything. In many places, it's simply the norm to go weekly and to run a Church youth group when you reach a certain age but doesn't say anything about belief, so OP should carefully screen for this the way some families screen for the opposite.

[Anonymous]

I find that au pairs also screen for religious issues. I think OP would be better off describing the required behaviors (prayer, church attendance, etc) than describing the beliefs she must have. Beliefs are incredibly open to interpretation. Describing behaviors is much less subjective.

We also seek secular APs. My guess is that the non-religious are in greater demand and there may be deeply religious candidates seeking the right placement. A lid for every pot, as they say.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:With APIA we've also seen some German girls that list heavy involvement with churches in their experience - they seem to be from southern Germany, so the more Catholic parts of Bavaria. Due to past personal baggage with a rematch from that area we don't recruit from that area (totally only a personal issue for our family) but it may work out great for you.

As a PP wrote, just listing going to church a lot doesn't necessarily mean anything in some parts of the world. Our past two APs and upcoming one all listed weekly attendance at their Catholic churches, but when probed, none had any real commitment to the religion; their involvement was very social. This actually was important to us - we DON'T want religious APs because we aren't religious at all - and specifically we do not agree with many of the preachings of the Catholic church on things like gay marriage, abortion, and questions of gender equity, so someone who was very firmly a believer in the Church's preachings wouldn't be a good fit for our family. My recommendation to OP is to ask lots of questions about faith and include something in the "dear AP" letter about the importance of faith and Christian beliefs, so that she can be clear for APs and prompt them to be clear for her whether their weekly attendance actually MEANS anything. In many places, it's simply the norm to go weekly and to run a Church youth group when you reach a certain age but doesn't say anything about belief, so OP should carefully screen for this the way some families screen for the opposite.

I just wanted to second this.

German au pairs even if they are involved in their church aren't necessarily deeply religious. In Catholic areas being an altar server is often expected in Catholic families (just speaking from personal experience being married to a Catholic who used to be very involved in his parish), after that they often end up in Church youth groups that aren't necessarily about religion (think playing table tennis rather than bible study) and supervising younger altar servers and confirmees (sp?) is often an easy way to gain child care hours. Catholic schools (who usually have a good reputation) also often expect their students to attend mass but that won't necessarily reflect on the applicant's faith.
Plus many German Christians have a rather liberal leaning towards what the church teaches. Even somebody who fulfils all basic criteria might still support gay marriage, premaritual intercourse (one of our friends who studied theology and teaches Catholic religion got his colleague pregnant after knowing her four weeks - so much for "Christian values"), living together unmarried, drinking, smoking, tattoos, swearing, wearing clothes of mixed fabric... even though they go to church, believe in God and consider themselves good Christians (both Catholics and Protestants). My personal gut feeling, if Germans are an option, would be to go for Baptists (but that's a typcial German prejudice)...

I would also recommend asking lots and lots of questions about faith, values, beliefs etc.

[Anonymous]

We're the opposite, in that we look for APs that are non-religious. So ironically I think I can help you.

We pay close attention to the "clues." An AP candidate who views her faith as central in importance typically will highlight that first and foremost and not be shy about it or downplay it. Many agencies (we use APIA) encourage the APs not to over-emphasize if they are devout because for US families, there is a concern about having someone very religious in their homes. (A lot of US families seem to want a person of faith but not a zealously religious person.)

If they share photos of them in church based activities, if they talk a lot about their faith and church life in their essay... those will be good signs for you. Those are the very things I look for to disqualify someone, but for you that is perfect.

Good luck, OP!

[Anonymous]

your best bet is someone who is a member of Church of Matter Day Saints, e.g. Mormon. They don't smoke, drink, no premarital sex, etc. Otherwise, A strict Fundamentalist.

[Anonymous]

Try christianaupairs.com

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:your best bet is someone who is a member of Church of Matter Day Saints, e.g. Mormon. They don't smoke, drink, no premarital sex, etc. Otherwise, A strict Fundamentalist.

Yea until the new found freedom of living away from their parents introduces them to all kinds of new things and they end up pregnant and with a DUI.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:your best bet is someone who is a member of Church of Matter Day Saints, e.g. Mormon. They don't smoke, drink, no premarital sex, etc. Otherwise, A strict Fundamentalist.

Yea until the new found freedom of living away from their parents introduces them to all kinds of new things and they end up pregnant and with a DUI.

I am not Mormon but know many and I know, nor have I ever heard, if a situation where they end up pregnant. Drinking, doing drugs, or drinking. It must be depressing to be so cynical.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:your best bet is someone who is a member of Church of Matter Day Saints, e.g. Mormon. They don't smoke, drink, no premarital sex, etc. Otherwise, A strict Fundamentalist.

Yea until the new found freedom of living away from their parents introduces them to all kinds of new things and they end up pregnant and with a DUI.

I am not Mormon but know many and I know, nor have I ever heard, if a situation where they end up pregnant. Drinking, doing drugs, or drinking. It must be depressing to be so cynical.

Not sure what you were trying to actually write... are you drunk right now?

[Anonymous]

The biggest issue I've heard about with the LDS au pairs is that they are really here looking for a husband, and once they find one, they drop out of the program.

[Anonymous]

We're hosting an LDS AP and it's working out really well for us. We didn't screen for religious compatibility in the sense of some one sharing our basic theological beliefs, but we did want some one whose lifestyle would be compatible with how we run our household, who wouldn't role model bad behavior to our children, and who would feel at ease when we say grace - though there's no pressure for her to say it with us. She could just sit quietly while we say it, which is what most of my family does when they visit.

Our AP has good values, is taking her AP year seriously, and she's not on the hunt for a husband as far as I can tell. If she did meet a great guy here though, what's the problem? I'd be happy for her.

[Anonymous]

Maybe a bit tangential here, but we are trying to match with a Mormon AP. We are Mormon, and have hosted non-Mormon APs successfully for 3 years. We are kind of looking to change things up a bit this next year and wanted to try to match with someone of our faith. They are tough to find, though! We have been looking for 2-3 months and between both CC and APIA, I think we have seen about 5-6 Mormon AP candidates. We just started interviewing a couple of weeks ago, and now the pool is down to 1 that I know of.

[Anonymous]

Hey 13:03, I'm the poster above you with the Mormon AP. Is there a listserve for your church? Maybe you could get the word out that you're interested in Mormon APs and maybe some one has connections abroad for young women who'd be interested in a year in the US? If anyone in your family has done a mission in a country that tends to have APs, then maybe their connections to the community back there could let their members know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hey 13:03, I'm the poster above you with the Mormon AP. Is there a listserve for your church? Maybe you could get the word out that you're interested in Mormon APs and maybe some one has connections abroad for young women who'd be interested in a year in the US? If anyone in your family has done a mission in a country that tends to have APs, then maybe their connections to the community back there could let their members know.

13:03 here. Thanks. Yes, I have thought about that kind of thing, but so far I haven't wanted to invest the time in scouting candidates myself. And using personal connections runs the risk of feeling pressured into a match that might not work for me otherwise. . . But it is something I may yet do in the future, i.e. look for a pre-match using my own channels through the church community.

[Anonymous]

I couldn't bare to reD all the posts out of pure shock. To the lady that said she wouldn't hire a Christian nanny due to her views on gay Marrige and abortion... You are thinking WAY too much into this. Maybe you and your AP / nanny wouldn't see eye to eye but how many times will your caregiver be talking to your child about pro choice or pro life?
If my female charge tells me she wants to marry her friend Sally I'm not going to say you can't marry a girl OR oh you know girls thAt get married are called lesbians... I would simply smile and say wow I can't believe you know who you are going to marry when your only 4! Blah blah blah...

what really fires me up tho is if this was a post about a Hindu family looking for a Hindu caregiver for religious reasons people would not even bat an eye... But everyone has to go aheAd and slam a Christian family for wanting a Christian caregiver! So hypocritical.

To the poster that said its the parents job to raise there spiritual well being of thier own child... Have you heard of Sunday school? Christian School? Bible collage? Religion can be taught by more than just the parents. It's about a community just like everything else.