What to charge nanny who will bring her 8 month old son to watch my 7 month old son at my house?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If she's any good, she'll be moving on to a better family. GL, op.

Why is this thread so full of trolls? One person says she'll watch your kid for free b/c otherwise she'd have to pay for daycare for her own kid (wtf) and then this person assumes she'll move on because (I assume?) you're looking for a discount because she brings her kid (wtf)?

OP -- I'd offer a bit less than I'd pay in a normal share for someone with her credentials (whatever they may be -- obviously kore for more experience, etc) b/c your kid will take an auto-back seat whereas they wouldn't in a traditional share.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you pay her nanny share rates, as in $8-$10/hour, she is an equal partner in the share and her wants/needs for her child are just as important as yours. She has an equal say in how things are done.

No she doesn't. Her child coming is a benefit. OP is still her MB and still determines how things are done for her child.

Then OP pays a higher price for that. At $10/hr they are equal partners. At $15/hr OP should have more control.

[Anonymous]

Good luck keeping the nanny on $10/hr lol

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Good luck keeping the nanny on $10/hr lol

Yea, OP pay her full rates so she can come neglect your child in your own home and leave your home a mess while she saves on childcare and cleanup and supplies in her own home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you pay her nanny share rates, as in $8-$10/hour, she is an equal partner in the share and her wants/needs for her child are just as important as yours. She has an equal say in how things are done.

No she doesn't. Her child coming is a benefit. OP is still her MB and still determines how things are done for her child.

Yes. She does. If she accepts a discounted rate because her baby is there...she is "paying" her portion of the share.
Of course OP can determine how things are done for her child, but so does the nanny.

That's not how this works. That's not how any of this works.

[Anonymous]

Yes, you can pay a discounted rate, probably $10 per hour due to this perk, but she is also coming to you which is highly convenient for you. Don't give me all this jazz about sharing all your kid's stuff. She'll likely bring her own kid's stuff, so don't cheap out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you pay her nanny share rates, as in $8-$10/hour, she is an equal partner in the share and her wants/needs for her child are just as important as yours. She has an equal say in how things are done.

No she doesn't. Her child coming is a benefit. OP is still her MB and still determines how things are done for her child.

Yes. She does. If she accepts a discounted rate because her baby is there...she is "paying" her portion of the share.
Of course OP can determine how things are done for her child, but so does the nanny.

That's not how this works. That's not how any of this works.

It is how this works. It is how all of this works.

[Anonymous]

I brought my child to work with me for a couple days a week. I'd been with the family about 7 months when this started so they knew I wouldn't neglect their child. I think ppl who say your child will take a backseat are ridiculous. When I brought my child, he took the backseat. My charge was MUCH more needy than he was, so she got more hugs and picked up more during the day. At the park, my kid would run free but my charge would be stuck to my side. Ppl thought she was mine because she was so attached to me. We did lunch and diaper changes as well as naps at the same time so no one was getting more attention than the other. If you thunk this woman would make a good nanny, OP...I'd say go for it. Also, I was already on the lower end of the one child pay scale so my employers paid me the same rate when I brought my child with me. Hope this helps.

[Anonymous]

Think*

[Anonymous]

PP it is /possible/ to have a nanny with her own child in tow who doesn't exclusively favor her own child at all times, but it is rare. Subconscious motives and hormones cloud the best of intentions when your own child is present. I am the author of a post here several months ago about the nanny I saw at an indoor playground caring for one of my babysitting clients' toddler (younger than 18 months at the time) alongside her own child of the same age. I'd heard my client rave about her awesome nanny, but when I saw them there I saw something very different: the nanny spent less than one minute with her charge for every five spent with her own child. I saw things I would say bordered on neglect and it was awful. I could tell by the way she played with her child that she was experienced with kids, and I'm sure she had the best of intentions but ultimately her charge was treated worse by her than she would've been in a daycare. She did not deserve a full nannies salary because she was not providing the care of a nanny.

[Anonymous]

I did see that post and that was one nanny. Of course, I love my child more; I gave birth to him. I've also been part of nanny shares where neither child is mine. I take care of the needs of the child who needs me most at that particular moment. So if my child is crying; I'll pick him up and vice versa if my charge is the one crying. When I have both crying, I sit on the couch and put one on either side of me. I can watch my own child without neglecting the needs of another.

[Anonymous]

Your post makes me question your abilities to care for other children wIth yours in tow even more, pp. That was the problem with the nanny I saw -- she waited until the other child was crying (often a direct result of the nanny's neglect) before the gave her attention. I'm sorry but if you want to be a nanny, and paid as such, don't have kids. If you have your own kids and want to be paid to work with other kids open a home daycare or work in a daycare facility. Don't call yourself a nanny.

Likewise, my plans to have kids are on hold while I nanny. If/when I have them, I know I would lose my nanny job and either be a SAHM or find a new profession.

[Anonymous]

While I get the notion that this is kinda like a share, in practice it's not the same because an experienced nanny won't work for only $8-10/hr even if she's willing to take a hit in order to bring her child along. If she's coming to you, helping you around the house while the babies nap, and generally following your desired schedule (story time, going to the park) rather than getting to set it according to her parenting preferences, then she's more like an employee than a share family IMO.

We hired some one in this situation and paid $12/hr. That's more than most share rates but less than a normal nanny rate.

[Anonymous]

I am a nanny with own child and would never accept $10/h If you don't trust the nanny then hire a nanny without own kid. I brought my child to work for almost 2 years and I charged $12/h first year and got raise to $14 in second year. I did (and do) love my child more than anyone else but iI did treat them the same.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your post makes me question your abilities to care for other children wIth yours in tow even more, pp. That was the problem with the nanny I saw -- she waited until the other child was crying (often a direct result of the nanny's neglect) before the gave her attention. I'm sorry but if you want to be a nanny, and paid as such, don't have kids. If you have your own kids and want to be paid to work with other kids open a home daycare or work in a daycare facility. Don't call yourself a nanny.

Likewise, my plans to have kids are on hold while I nanny. If/when I have them, I know I would lose my nanny job and either be a SAHM or find a new profession.

You're kidding right? You obviously wouldn't be able to be professional in such a situation so I think, yes, you probably will need to quit nannying when you become a mother. Children cry for many reasons...so my charge wouldn't be crying because I was neglecting her. You keep harping on this nanny you saw once...that wasn't me and I can tell you, I was seen out many times with both kids and no one can say that I neglected my charge for my own child. As a matter of fact, I kept a closer eye on her because I have a great fear of something happening to someones child under my care. I'm now doing a nanny share and my child is in full time daycare because I know I can't handle a hyperactive toddler and 2 infants. You, however, seem to have serious issues. I suspect your problem with this nanny you saw is personal. You don't know me so you can't cast judgment on my abilities as a nanny. If I could afford to stay home with my kid, I would and so would many other mothers.