I don't want to share my private life with my employers

[Anonymous]

I would not tell my MB/DB either. Their first thought would be about how my grief might affect them anyway.

I am truly sorry, OP. I have lost two close friends and it is so painful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would not tell my MB/DB either. Their first thought would be about how my grief might affect them anyway.

I am truly sorry, OP. I have lost two close friends and it is so painful.

This would be my MB's only thought. And you know what? That is fine with me. She is my boss and not my friend.

To OP: I am sorry your friend is gone. Have a safe trip home and take care of yourself.

[Anonymous]

First, OP, please accept my sincere condolences on the loss of a dear friend.

Second, you are doing the right thing IMO in keeping your private life out of your work life. No, if I did not have to tell my MB (if I didn't need time off) I most certainly would not tell her. My private life is my own as are my feelings.

Third, please take care of yourself. Eat healthfully and try to get at least 8 hours of sleep a night. Grief is exhausting.

[Anonymous]

I am so sorry for your loss, OP.

You don't have to tell your employers a damn thing. None of this has any effect on their lives or your work. They do not own your off-hours nor your feelings.

[Anonymous]

Sorry for your loss, OP. When I was dealing with a stressful personal situation over the summer, my job and charges were a welcome relief from dealing with stressful adult life. You have every right to keep it to yourself.

One thing - I don't know how likely this is, but if your bosses ever ask "how is your friend so and so doing?" you need to be prepared for that. My answer would probably be "he's not well, but it's not something I'm able to discuss right now" and leave it at that. My bosses (and hopefully yours) would know to leave it alone.

[Anonymous]

OP here and thank you for your kind words and condolences. It has been an emotional and exhausting few days for me -- I am so very sad. My only bright spot right now is knowing I will see my charge -- with a huge smile on his face -- on Monday morning. I will not tell my employers a thing. For one thing, I just want the freedom to forget for a little while.

My friend is gone. That will be a wound I have for a very, very long time.

Again, thank you to all who responded.

[Anonymous]

I hope tomorrow is a good day for you, OP.

I lost my best friend last summer and I am still devastated by the loss. It physically hurts. My charges, with their energy and giggles, really helped me get through those first few months. Times like this I am so happy I am a nanny and not stuck in an office job with my sad thoughts. The kids kept me hopping!

I wish you all the best, OP.