Nanny giving toddler unapproved food

[Anonymous]

You get what you pay for. You can keep fighting basic facts, but the facts are still the facts. Just listen to yourselves. If she can get another job tomorrow at your same cheap rate, she's going to do as she pleases. Why not?

When one of you wants to pay her better than the rest, I suspect she'll take you a little more seriously.

Try it if you want. Due deligence still required, obviously.

[Anonymous]

You must be on the wrong thread, bitter nanny. This thread isn't about rates or her pay. It's about a nanny who lies to her employer and violates her contract.

Try to keep up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You must be on the wrong thread, bitter nanny. This thread isn't about rates or her pay. It's about a nanny who lies to her employer and violates her contract.

Try to keep up.

And you are fooled into believing that
performance and compensation
have no correlation.

[Anonymous]

I would fire her for lying to your face- not so much for the Cheerios. That said her behavior also shows a disregard for how serious food allergies can be so really she should be let go when it happens again. And it almost certainly will.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You get what you pay for. You can keep fighting basic facts, but the facts are still the facts. Just listen to yourselves. If she can get another job tomorrow at your same cheap rate, she's going to do as she pleases. Why not?

When one of you wants to pay her better than the rest, I suspect she'll take you a little more seriously.

Try it if you want. Due deligence still required, obviously.

Being paid poorly is grounds for quitting, not for doing a poor job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You get what you pay for. You can keep fighting basic facts, but the facts are still the facts. Just listen to yourselves. If she can get another job tomorrow at your same cheap rate, she's going to do as she pleases. Why not?

When one of you wants to pay her better than the rest, I suspect she'll take you a little more seriously.

Try it if you want. Due deligence still required, obviously.

Being paid poorly is grounds for quitting, not for doing a poor job.

You and I may agree on that, however others (who are paid less than a living wage), may well have a very different opinion.
Their opinions and experiences are no less valid than ours.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You get what you pay for. You can keep fighting basic facts, but the facts are still the facts. Just listen to yourselves. If she can get another job tomorrow at your same cheap rate, she's going to do as she pleases. Why not?

When one of you wants to pay her better than the rest, I suspect she'll take you a little more seriously.

Try it if you want. Due deligence still required, obviously.

Being paid poorly is grounds for quitting, not for doing a poor job.

You and I may agree on that, however others (who are paid less than a living wage), may well have a very different opinion.
Their opinions and experiences are no less valid than ours.

I agree with this to some extent but when you are taking care of children I think that changes this. It's not the children's fault if their parents are bad employers. I'm not saying you should stay at a job where you are treated poorly or paid badly but you shouldn't take it out on the children either. They are innocent in this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You get what you pay for. You can keep fighting basic facts, but the facts are still the facts. Just listen to yourselves. If she can get another job tomorrow at your same cheap rate, she's going to do as she pleases. Why not?

When one of you wants to pay her better than the rest, I suspect she'll take you a little more seriously.

Try it if you want. Due deligence still required, obviously.

Being paid poorly is grounds for quitting, not for doing a poor job.

You and I may agree on that, however others (who are paid less than a living wage), may well have a very different opinion.
Their opinions and experiences are no less valid than ours.

I agree with this to some extent but when you are taking care of children I think that changes this. It's not the children's fault if their parents are bad employers. I'm not saying you should stay at a job where you are treated poorly or paid badly but you shouldn't take it out on the children either. They are innocent in this.

Who wants to take anything out on the children?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You get what you pay for. You can keep fighting basic facts, but the facts are still the facts. Just listen to yourselves. If she can get another job tomorrow at your same cheap rate, she's going to do as she pleases. Why not?

When one of you wants to pay her better than the rest, I suspect she'll take you a little more seriously.

Try it if you want. Due deligence still required, obviously.

Being paid poorly is grounds for quitting, not for doing a poor job.

You and I may agree on that, however others (who are paid less than a living wage), may well have a very different opinion.
Their opinions and experiences are no less valid than ours.

I agree with this to some extent but when you are taking care of children I think that changes this. It's not the children's fault if their parents are bad employers. I'm not saying you should stay at a job where you are treated poorly or paid badly but you shouldn't take it out on the children either. They are innocent in this.

Who wants to take anything out on the children?

If you're doing a "poor job" that's taking it out on the children who are the recipients of your "poor job."

[Anonymous]

I could find nothing about a Cheerio contributing death, illess, hospitalizaion, delinquency of a child or an adult. OP, you are in serious need of help. Fire her, quit your job, and stay home and helicopter 24/7 your snowflake.

[Anonymous]

Disagree with the PP re:Cheerios. They might not be death machines but coming from a family with a history of food sensitivities, I wouldn't want them given to my child either.

OP I don't really know what to tell you. You should talk to the nanny and say, "Sarah, I know you said you must have dropped those Cheerios on the high-chair, and I'm going to take you at your word, but I do want to reiterate exactly why we're not feeding them to Luke. (then explain the food sensitivities issue) If you're looking for a food that will keep him busy for a few minutes without presenting much of a choking hazard, I have/will get some frozen peas/rice crackers/other snack for him."

But then you just have to trust that she'll hear you and respect you and that you can trust her. I'd hope you'd be able to tell based on her reaction to your explanation, but I don't envy you that leap of faith.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I could find nothing about a Cheerio contributing death, illess, hospitalizaion, delinquency of a child or an adult. OP, you are in serious need of help. Fire her, quit your job, and stay home and helicopter 24/7 your snowflake.

This.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I could find nothing about a Cheerio contributing death, illess, hospitalizaion, delinquency of a child or an adult. OP, you are in serious need of help. Fire her, quit your job, and stay home and helicopter 24/7 your snowflake.

This.

Right, because the evidence of internal inflammation caused by wheat should be completely ignored in a family with food allergies/sensitivities? Wheat causes eczema in me, so I won't give it to my kids. Period. A nanny ought to be able to follow those simple instructions and if you're suggesting that's too tall a task, how can you even pretend to be nannies yourselves?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I could find nothing about a Cheerio contributing death, illess, hospitalizaion, delinquency of a child or an adult. OP, you are in serious need of help. Fire her, quit your job, and stay home and helicopter 24/7 your snowflake.

This.

That's not the point. Do you think it's ok for the nanny to lie to the parents and explicitly go against their wishes? If she lies about this what else is she lying about. If she doesn't like their policy she can find another job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would be concerned about the lying and the fact she did something you explicitly asked her not to do. It doesn't matter how minor it may seem to other people. If she lies about that what else will she lie about.

We had a nanny who seemed great despite what we thought were a few small lies. She would lie about little things like when I told her she should feel free to eat anything or make coffee if she'd like. She totally me on multiple occasions that she would never eat our food etc, despite my telling her on multiple occasions she could, but food would disappear, like my coffee creamer that my husband hates and my kids were obviously not having. We thought the little lies weren't a big deal since she was good with the kids until one day she accidentally gave DC too much Advil. When she realized her mistake (and I realize it was an unintentional mistake) she lied to try to cover it up. That was when I realized I couldn't trust her at all and we had to let her go.

So my point is be careful of the little lies because it could lead to bigger ones.

+1 I would occasionally find juice in my DDs sippy cup - we are a no juice family. The first time I mentioned it, after having thrown away the proof my AP denied giving juice to her ever. I caught on to a couple f other small lies that were cover ups too. By the end of her time with us my trust in her was extremely low and I was working from home most of the time.