Remember that song, "I Don't Like Mondays"? Every family I have worked for is like this. Even the ones I've loved. I understand they work all week and the weekend is their only downtime but I'm one person and I manage to keep the kitchen clean and the toys put away and the laundry done and the trash emptied five days a week while with the kids and two adults can't do for two days a week?????? |
SAHM here, welcome to my world, except that I never get a day off -- and I am responsible for all of the household and childcare work! |
SAHM here again. Oh, and I am not paid for it either, and my vacations -- well -- they always include the DH and kids I work for 24/7. Welcome to my world! |
You chose to have a family, therefore you have to suck it up. I chose to be a nanny and care for the kids and do light housekeeping during the week, which I don't mind doing (like taking out the trash etc). BUT, I also have to go home and do all my own housekeeping on the weekends which is MY time off work. A family with 2 parents, should be able to do THEIR chores on the weekends as well, even if it is their time off work and when they want to relax and spend time with the kids. There is no excuse to leave it for Mondays when I come back to work and expect me to either clean it up for them, or have to work around the mess which gets in my way. Besides, a lot of the stuff parents say they don't want to do because they want to spend time with their kids, doesn't take long to do. It is like 5 minutes here and there, or if left until the end of the weekend, it might take an hour. If you clean as you go, it takes less time out of your day (or at least you don't notice it taking so much time). Parents can also do things when the kids go to bed. I am sure not all parents go to sleep at the same time their kids do. Take some initiative and do a few things after they are in bed, then you can rest and relax some more. Get your kids to do regular chores, they can help clean their own mess as well as other things around the house. It gives you time with your kids, teaches them how to be productive and more independent, and it will take less time to get things done with more people doing it. |
Oh here we go.. Woe is me, I'm a SAHM. Everyone pity me because I made the choice of having children and taking care of them.. ![]() |
You have got your family trained wrong! As a parent you want to train your kids and husband to pick up after themselves - if you don't you are creating a rod of your own back. |
SAHM here. Though my DH and DCs are “trained” to help and do so, I am responsible for both childcare responsibilities and household duties. Although I will have taken 20 years off my career as an attorney, when all is said and done the work I have done by staying “at home” will never be valued by society generally or for social security purposes (issue for another posting). It is clearly difficult work – as neither nannies nor MBs or DBs seem interested in the day-to-day difficulties of both caring for the children and managing the household duties. As PPs note, however, this is the path I chose, and I am by-and-large comfortable with it.
However, and here is my point, as a former student of Economics (and no, not Home Economics), I recognize that the value of all work is quantifiable, and that the work that I do (childcare duties + household responsibilities) can and will be done by someone else -- given enough money. In Latin America, the truly wealthy will hire someone separate for every task (cook, chauffeur, nanny, laundress, and housekeeper). The merely wealthy might hire only a manejadora (nanny) and housekeeper. Latin American manejadoras are really jacks-of-all-trades -- they cook the meals, clean the house, do the laundry, and take care of the children. Go to a public park in Key Biscayne, Florida today, and you will see that these “manejadoras” or nannies, even wear formal uniforms (which I find truly shocking!). I am simply saying that although some nannies may not want to fill the role of SAHP, responsible for both all the childcare and household work (and I do not fault you, because who does?), there are other nannies who are happy -- or at least willing – to contract to do ALL the stay-at-home work of the family. Any variation of nanny work is fine, so long as both the nanny and the employer carefully discuss at the outset what they expect from the other, and the nanny is fairly compensated for the amount of work done. |