Met Somebody in Another Country

post reply Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)
[Post New]02/25/2018 05:56
quote
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Don’t listen to all the bitter ignorant people on this chat. We can all be taken advantage of in the US and abroad,m; it’s part of being vulnerable and falling in love.
As a foreigner, I am offended by all these comments.

I moved to the US after meeting an American guys when we were both very young. It didn’t work out, but never did I consider marrying him for a visa. I am wealthier and much better educated than all the American man I have dated (I did date an uber wealthy Colombian back in the day). I ended up marrying a non-American in the US... if I wanted I would have had my pick of American man.

If you really like her, try it out and see where it goes. Argentina is a beautiful country and you may prefer to live there in the future


I'm sure you married an investment banker, which is just as bad as marrying someone for their citizenship.

If you married a guy who works at Taco Bell or McDondalds drive-thru, my apologies
[Post New]02/25/2018 06:31
quote
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Not everyone wants to live in the US. Why does everyone assume this?


Because a hell of a lot of people do want to live in the US and those of us who have traveled extensively in places like - for me, China, Vietnam, Thailand, India - getting hit up for visas left, right, and center leaves us a bit, ughh, jaded.

Can someone please tell me what a visa sponsorship letter is and if that is something that we do in the US. When I lived in China people were forever asking me to write them a visa sponsorship letter that they would then take to the consulate. Does that mean anything to the consular officers? Did people think I was going to put myself on the hook financially/legally to get them to the US or ensure they returned to China? I never figured that one out.


Exactly. I am a US citizen but family is from south america. I refuse to take any relationship abroad seriously because I know the need for visa is strong. I got a proposal from a prosecutor, a dentist, and a surgeon abroad but i would only do it if i were desperate.
[Post New]02/25/2018 06:37
quote
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Do you speak Spanish? Does she speak English? And I don’t mean basic skills but full fluency. I’ve spent significant time living in Argentina and have visited every country in Latin America through a combination of tourism and business travel. In no country did I get more male attention than Argentina. I also regularly had people ask me to write visa sponsorship letters for my country which is not the US.


OP Here -- Yes she speaks English very well. I'm very well traveled and have met lots of nice foreigners, but this is the first one that has made me consider anything more than a fling. We've been texting since I've been back and sharing pictures from the trip. Mostly small talk with some talk about possibly meeting up again. The consensus here seems to be that I'm about to get scammed and lose a kidney.


Why travel abroad to find a woman or man? There are a lot of foreigners and south americans in the US! Many are permanent residents or citizens.
[Post New]02/25/2018 08:43
quote
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:What country? 12 hrs is either South America, Africa or the Middle East


What???? 12 hours from DC is South East Asia. Think Thailand.


You don't travel much...12 hrs is Japan at best. Thailand is 20+ hours.
[Post New]02/25/2018 08:46
quote
Anonymous
OP I have friends that met abroad and lived / dated there for a year. Then did long distance then she moved here. She gorgeous and nice. Now they are married. She hates her life in the US. Very high maintenance woman. Our friend made a not great choice and is stuck with it until she leaves him (probably once she had a green card and he loses his hair).
[Post New]02/25/2018 09:24
quote
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Don’t listen to all the bitter ignorant people on this chat. We can all be taken advantage of in the US and abroad,m; it’s part of being vulnerable and falling in love.
As a foreigner, I am offended by all these comments.

I moved to the US after meeting an American guys when we were both very young. It didn’t work out, but never did I consider marrying him for a visa. I am wealthier and much better educated than all the American man I have dated (I did date an uber wealthy Colombian back in the day). I ended up marrying a non-American in the US... if I wanted I would have had my pick of American man.

If you really like her, try it out and see where it goes. Argentina is a beautiful country and you may prefer to live there in the future


I'm sure you married an investment banker, which is just as bad as marrying someone for their citizenship.

If you married a guy who works at Taco Bell or McDondalds drive-thru, my apologies


Ahaha this is funny. Did not marry either, though I was engaged to an American investment banker before marrying my current husband who is from Latin America and works for an international organization. I am the last person who would marry for money or citizenship... I married him for the sex!

OP go for it!!!
[Post New]02/25/2018 14:09
quote
Anonymous
OP, your relationship may work out in the sense that one can't fully rule out a Martian spaceship landing in your backyard. But the laws of probability are against you.

Not because of the visa or money matters, but because long-distance relationships are usually built on fantasy, not reality. You don't have enough day-to-day interaction to fuel a realistic connection. What you have is a fantasy of what it would be like. It rarely can compete with reality, even if it does happen.
[Post New]02/25/2018 17:27
quote
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Do you speak Spanish? Does she speak English? And I don’t mean basic skills but full fluency. I’ve spent significant time living in Argentina and have visited every country in Latin America through a combination of tourism and business travel. In no country did I get more male attention than Argentina. I also regularly had people ask me to write visa sponsorship letters for my country which is not the US.


OP Here -- Yes she speaks English very well. I'm very well traveled and have met lots of nice foreigners, but this is the first one that has made me consider anything more than a fling. We've been texting since I've been back and sharing pictures from the trip. Mostly small talk with some talk about possibly meeting up again. The consensus here seems to be that I'm about to get scammed and lose a kidney.


Why travel abroad to find a woman or man? There are a lot of foreigners and south americans in the US! Many are permanent residents or citizens.


Most of those living in the US for a while are fat.
[Post New]02/25/2018 21:04
quote
TwistdMike
Member Offline
Anonymous wrote:
TwistdMike wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Do you speak Spanish? Does she speak English? And I don’t mean basic skills but full fluency. I’ve spent significant time living in Argentina and have visited every country in Latin America through a combination of tourism and business travel. In no country did I get more male attention than Argentina. I also regularly had people ask me to write visa sponsorship letters for my country which is not the US.


OP Here -- Yes she speaks English very well. I'm very well traveled and have met lots of nice foreigners, but this is the first one that has made me consider anything more than a fling. We've been texting since I've been back and sharing pictures from the trip. Mostly small talk with some talk about possibly meeting up again. The consensus here seems to be that I'm about to get scammed and lose a kidney.


If you were going to lose a kidney, it would have already happened while you were there.

I’ve had relationships abroad, ended up marrying one of them, going on double digits in happy years. Not everyone is out to get you or use you for your nationality. My wife has said many times, the land of the free is not free at all. Meaning the taxes, laws, conservative views are much more restrictive than her native country.

Just go into the relationship with a little caution, not giving more than you’re willing to lose, until you get to know her, her family, culture, and what will be expected of you.

Learning a new culture, experiences, foods, etc. can be a great and happy journey.

Go for it and enjoy!


OP Here - Thanks -- how did you build the relationship over long distance? Honestly, I want to move out of the US if the circumstances were right. A lot of other countries are awesome.


Expat life is not for everyone, but if you’re built for it and open minded, it’s great. I’ve had a good ride and don’t see an end to it anytime soon. Depending on your career choice, it may be easier to achieve than you think, even teachers can get jobs abroad for english skills.

I frequently traveled to her country, so we were able to spend time together quite often, maybe 5 months out of the year. Social apps such as WhatsApp, Facebook, FaceTime, etc. filled in the gaps with online camera time. We did this for a year or so before making the larger commitment. Even today, we still are separated from time to time, depending upon life, activities with family and friends, we probably spend 3 months out of the year apart. I think it makes us appreciate each other more.

Long distance relationships are like expat life, some are built for it while others are not. You will never truly know unless you try it.

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