When he turns it down

Anonymous wrote:All we ever hear about on this forum is wives who are "low-drive"; what about when your husband never wants it? I've made overtures to DH three times in the last week; nothing. This is kind of typical. And no, I'm not fat and yes, we do have a good relationship, otherwise. I haven't let myself go. We have young kids and both WOH, but we are happy and have a decent amount of down time in the evenings.

What gives?

I am in the same boat.. but I stopped initiating

on dec 27 it will be one year without sex... can't believe we are under 40 and this is happening ...(and no, he is not gay, not cheating, he says he loves me and his T is officially normal)

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12/19/2016 03:37

Subject: When he turns it down

quote

Anonymous

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All we ever hear about on this forum is wives who are "low-drive"; what about when your husband never wants it? I've made overtures to DH three times in the last week; nothing. This is kind of typical. And no, I'm not fat and yes, we do have a good relationship, otherwise. I haven't let myself go. We have young kids and both WOH, but we are happy and have a decent amount of down time in the evenings.

What gives?

I am in the same boat.. but I stopped initiating on dec 27 it will be one year without sex... can't believe we are under 40 and this is happening ...(and no, he is not gay, not cheating, he says he loves me and his T is officially normal)

Find the one of those that's actually accurate.

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12/19/2016 03:40

Subject: When he turns it down

quote

Anonymous

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All we ever hear about on this forum is wives who are "low-drive"; what about when your husband never wants it? I've made overtures to DH three times in the last week; nothing. This is kind of typical. And no, I'm not fat and yes, we do have a good relationship, otherwise. I haven't let myself go. We have young kids and both WOH, but we are happy and have a decent amount of down time in the evenings.

What gives?

I am in the same boat.. but I stopped initiating on dec 27 it will be one year without sex... can't believe we are under 40 and this is happening ...(and no, he is not gay, not cheating, he says he loves me and his T is officially normal)

Find the one of those that's actually accurate.

^^ inaccurate.

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12/19/2016 05:21

Subject: When he turns it down

quote

Anonymous

Anonymous wrote:All we ever hear about on this forum is wives who are "low-drive"; what about when your husband never wants it? I've made overtures to DH three times in the last week; nothing. This is kind of typical. And no, I'm not fat and yes, we do have a good relationship, otherwise. I haven't let myself go. We have young kids and both WOH, but we are happy and have a decent amount of down time in the evenings.

What gives?

The reason you always hear about low-drive wives is that the #1 sexual dysfunction for women is loss of sexual desire, also called hypoactive sexual desire disorder (HSDD), which occurs in up to 40% of women.

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12/19/2016 05:38

Subject: Re:When he turns it down

quote

Anonymous

OP, sorry you haven't gotten a lot of constructive feedback. As a man in your situation, I feel for you.

Just to clarify, have you had any sex recently or is it only rejection?

If this is a temporary blip, and it is just this week or even this month, then I wouldn't worry about it yet. If its becoming a pattern, it's likely one of the following: performance issues from him (ED), too much masturbation which causes #1, boredom in the bedroom, he's cheating or he has low T.

Try scheduling sex. It's not sexy but at least he can mentally prepare for it. If he turns down scheduled sex, then you have a bigger problem.

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12/19/2016 08:36

Subject: When he turns it down

quote

Anonymous

Read five love languages. There is a catalyst somewhere if health isn't an issue. For example- if his language is words of affirmation, if you said something to him that hurts his feelings he will not want to have sex with you. People where is is important rarely forgive or have a hard time getting over verbal transgressions.

Also, how do you look? If you were 120lbs and how your 190 that could also have something to do with it.

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12/19/2016 08:37

Subject: When he turns it down

quote

singledadmclean
Member
Joined: 12/13/2016 13:16
Messages: 28
Offline

Anonymous wrote:Have you tried wearing a black corset, garters, and fishnet stockings?

Don't forget the stilettos!

profile p.m.

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12/19/2016 09:28

Subject: When he turns it down

quote

Anonymous

Anonymous wrote:Have you tried wearing a black corset, garters, and fishnet stockings?

Yeah but DH didn't want to have sex with Tim Curry.

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12/19/2016 09:30

Subject: When he turns it down

quote

Anonymous

Anonymous wrote:Read five love languages. There is a catalyst somewhere if health isn't an issue. For example- if his language is words of affirmation, if you said something to him that hurts his feelings he will not want to have sex with you. People where is is important rarely forgive or have a hard time getting over verbal transgressions.

Also, how do you look? If you were 120lbs and how your 190 that could also have something to do with it.

Eh that love languages shit is for the women. When she gets naked, that's speaking the love language of most men.

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12/19/2016 09:32

Subject: When he turns it down

quote

Anonymous

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Read five love languages. There is a catalyst somewhere if health isn't an issue. For example- if his language is words of affirmation, if you said something to him that hurts his feelings he will not want to have sex with you. People where is is important rarely forgive or have a hard time getting over verbal transgressions.

Also, how do you look? If you were 120lbs and how your 190 that could also have something to do with it.

Eh that love languages shit is for the women. When she gets naked, that's speaking the love language of most men.

That's right. Men can take the quiz and it is (almost) always going to end up being physical touch. The other stuff, the women's love languages, those are important so the men can figure out what it takes to get her naked so she'll touch him.

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12/19/2016 09:33

Subject: When he turns it down

quote

Anonymous

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All we ever hear about on this forum is wives who are "low-drive"; what about when your husband never wants it? I've made overtures to DH three times in the last week; nothing. This is kind of typical. And no, I'm not fat and yes, we do have a good relationship, otherwise. I haven't let myself go. We have young kids and both WOH, but we are happy and have a decent amount of down time in the evenings.

What gives?

The reason you always hear about low-drive wives is that the #1 sexual dysfunction for women is loss of sexual desire, also called hypoactive sexual desire disorder (HSDD), which occurs in up to 40% of women.

Bored With You Disorder (BWYD) affects an even larger percentage of women.

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12/19/2016 09:40

Subject: When he turns it down

quote

Anonymous

So op you can talk to him about role playing /fantasy stuff. Just remember to ID/ask what about the fansty turns him on or interests him. Also it's a two ways street, you his and he does yours.
So just dressing up may or may not do it for him, you have to talk to him about and I depends on how much he trust you.
Also getting away from your routine is nice- a weekend at a local 5 start hotel.

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12/19/2016 11:14

Subject: When he turns it down

quote

Anonymous

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All we ever hear about on this forum is wives who are "low-drive"; what about when your husband never wants it? I've made overtures to DH three times in the last week; nothing. This is kind of typical. And no, I'm not fat and yes, we do have a good relationship, otherwise. I haven't let myself go. We have young kids and both WOH, but we are happy and have a decent amount of down time in the evenings.

What gives?

The reason you always hear about low-drive wives is that the #1 sexual dysfunction for women is loss of sexual desire, also called hypoactive sexual desire disorder (HSDD), which occurs in up to 40% of women.

Bored With You Disorder (BWYD) affects an even larger percentage of women.

+1000
HSDD isn't real, but BWYD certainly is.

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