Is your life turning out like you planned?

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[Post New]09/25/2014 14:16
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I was supposed to marry a wealthy Jew and shop at Saks., host dinner parties, volunteer for a select non-profit. This did not happen.

I am disappointed that I am still buying clothes for myself at Old Navy in my 40's and driving a 13 year old car. I know these are just trappings, but I feel as if I have let my ancestors down not only by failing to continue to step up the socioeconomic ladder, but by falling down several rungs.



Someone that marries a wealthy jew is probably not posting on DCUM on Rosh Hashanah.


I did and I'm posting. No, I am not Jewish. I also married him when he was poor.


Mark Zuckerberg's wife?


No, I married a nice man.
[Post New]09/25/2014 14:47
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Not at all.

In my 20s I ended up in an abusive relationship and workplace. Both situations set me back 5 years in my career and personal life.

On the positive, it drove me to a lucrative and family-friendly career that financed both leaving the abuse and resolving the career issues.

Now I'm starting a new page in life and hope to finally find a good partner and build a better future together.


I'm rooting for you!
[Post New]09/25/2014 14:50
quote
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I was supposed to marry a wealthy Jew and shop at Saks., host dinner parties, volunteer for a select non-profit. This did not happen.

I am disappointed that I am still buying clothes for myself at Old Navy in my 40's and driving a 13 year old car. I know these are just trappings, but I feel as if I have let my ancestors down not only by failing to continue to step up the socioeconomic ladder, but by falling down several rungs.



Someone that marries a wealthy jew is probably not posting on DCUM on Rosh Hashanah.


I did and I'm posting. No, I am not Jewish. I also married him when he was poor.


Mark Zuckerberg's wife?


No, I married a nice man.


MZ has a rep as a jerk? Have heard some SV companies are very sexist though.
[Post New]09/25/2014 14:54
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:No it did not, but in a good way. My childhood was fairly screwy, very unhappy parents who lacked life skills. As a result my plans were based on avoiding their fate. I planned to be an artist and intellectual, move to NYC or similar destination, and be single, childless and cool forever, plus lots of travel, and write interesting books.

However my personality is completely different from those plans, which came as a huge surprise to me as I actually began to drive toward those goals and experienced - unhappiness and discomfort with it.

Instead of all that, I am - and I love and relish being - a wife and mom who works in an office. I love being productive, private, noisy and busy, entering into my kids interests with them, the structure and pick up/put down nature of my job, doing charitable activities and supporting community efforts, trying new recipes, getting together with coworkers or other parents - just regular stuff. Just being a regular jane turned out to be so great, I have to laugh at my younger self.

But those earlier dreams were born out of the idea that a regular life wasn't possible for me, and I am happy to be wrong and relish the day to day.


Are you me? Wish we knew each other.
[Post New]09/25/2014 14:54
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:No. Incredibly better

Details please!


I came from a low class family and somehow snagged a GS 3 government job at 18. My only plan was to not be poor and get out of house. I had no expectation of marriage but only wanted a job. Worked my way up to a GS7 and urged by a supervisor to take college courses. Finished night school, then a master's program which led to a private sector job where I met my husband. Now have two great children and a good husband and live in a modest but nice house with average area incomes. My mother cried the first time she saw our home. This unplanned life has allowed me to help many people and I am grateful to have it
[Post New]09/25/2014 15:03
quote
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:No. Incredibly better

Details please!


I came from a low class family and somehow snagged a GS 3 government job at 18. My only plan was to not be poor and get out of house. I had no expectation of marriage but only wanted a job. Worked my way up to a GS7 and urged by a supervisor to take college courses. Finished night school, then a master's program which led to a private sector job where I met my husband. Now have two great children and a good husband and live in a modest but nice house with average area incomes. My mother cried the first time she saw our home. This unplanned life has allowed me to help many people and I am grateful to have it


LOVE this!
[Post New]09/25/2014 15:05
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Anonymous
No, because when I was younger I stupidly thought everything would just happen to me with no effort on my part...I planned for a husband, a big house, and four kids. I wanted to be taken care of.

After several bad, codependent relationships I met my DH. He was self-made and independent and encouraged me to be the same. I finished my degree, got a great job, bought my own place, and eventually my DH moved in with me and we got married. We have a fantastic kid and are hoping for another. Life is busy and sometimes stressful, but we make it work and it's on our own terms. I think I'm a late bloomer - I probably could have had the life I'd planned for if I'd stayed with one of the controlling guys I was with in my 20s, but ultimately I don't think I would have been happy. This life is better.
[Post New]09/25/2014 16:07
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Anonymous
No, but I wanted it all. Came from an abusive and dysfunctional family, low socio economic status. Estranged from my family (but that's not a surprise and for the best).

On the plus side, motherhood has been extremely fulfilling. My education was amazing--great college and grad school that resulted in good friends, professional connections, rewarding career financially and intellectually.

Deeply unhappy in my marriage and that's the major thing that turned out not as hoped. I'm really not sure what to do.

[Post New]09/25/2014 16:44
quote
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:No. Incredibly better

Details please!


I came from a low class family and somehow snagged a GS 3 government job at 18. My only plan was to not be poor and get out of house. I had no expectation of marriage but only wanted a job. Worked my way up to a GS7 and urged by a supervisor to take college courses. Finished night school, then a master's program which led to a private sector job where I met my husband. Now have two great children and a good husband and live in a modest but nice house with average area incomes. My mother cried the first time she saw our home. This unplanned life has allowed me to help many people and I am grateful to have it


This warms my heart. Thanks for posting this. You sound like a wonderful person.
[Post New]09/25/2014 16:45
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Mine is not, I wish things were different.
My parents died.
My son has issues. I worry for him.
My marriage is mediocre at best.
I no longer speak to my sister due to her mental issues.
I had higher hopes.

What about you?


OP, I could have written your post exactly word for word with the exception that I do speak with my sister but we are not close. Almost brings tears to my eyes.

Hugs to you.
[Post New]09/25/2014 17:25
quote
ChuckMurphy
Member Offline
No, it has not
[Post New]09/25/2014 17:35
quote
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:No. Incredibly better

Details please!


I came from a low class family and somehow snagged a GS 3 government job at 18. My only plan was to not be poor and get out of house. I had no expectation of marriage but only wanted a job. Worked my way up to a GS7 and urged by a supervisor to take college courses. Finished night school, then a master's program which led to a private sector job where I met my husband. Now have two great children and a good husband and live in a modest but nice house with average area incomes. My mother cried the first time she saw our home. This unplanned life has allowed me to help many people and I am grateful to have it


This warms my heart. Thanks for posting this. You sound like a wonderful person.


+ 1
[Post New]09/25/2014 17:36
quote
Anonymous
I had such a crazy ride to where I am today that I am in shock that I made it here!
[Post New]09/25/2014 17:47
quote
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:No. Incredibly better

Details please!


I came from a low class family and somehow snagged a GS 3 government job at 18. My only plan was to not be poor and get out of house. I had no expectation of marriage but only wanted a job. Worked my way up to a GS7 and urged by a supervisor to take college courses. Finished night school, then a master's program which led to a private sector job where I met my husband. Now have two great children and a good husband and live in a modest but nice house with average area incomes. My mother cried the first time she saw our home. This unplanned life has allowed me to help many people and I am grateful to have it


This warms my heart. Thanks for posting this. You sound like a wonderful person.


I got tears in my eyes thinking of your mother's joy.
[Post New]09/25/2014 18:06
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Anonymous
I had no plan. My life has turned out way better than I could have ever dreamed. I have no complaints and would not trade a single thing with anyone. I'm especially grateful for my good marriage that still has passion. Not many people I know are still in love.
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