Tell me about being poor

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[Post New]08/01/2012 21:26
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Anonymous
There are lots of different "poor"

There are the Applachia-type poor where the whole community lives in the same type of poverty and no one knows anything different.

There's poor who are too proud to accept handouts and struggle quietly to hide that they lack things

There's poor who expect handouts and live completely expecting the system to take care of them forever (big arguments in a major city now about food stamp money (whatever it's called now) that can be used for manicures, tattoos and alcohol. Seriously?)

There are elderly poor who have reached the end of their savings and don't know what's next.

There's "poor" who think they are doing without a lot and actually have no idea how much more the "real" poor are doing without

And on and on . . .
[Post New]08/01/2012 21:44
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Anonymous
The media is forever saying it's poor people shopping at WalMart and eating fast food. Yet almost none of the responders do either. So who the hell is purchasing those products?


My very wealthy southern in-laws seem to go there to buy something pretty much every day, even after allegedy getting screwed over by Wal-Mart in some sort of business deal a few years ago. They don't buy clothing there, but they do buy groceries and houehold items etc.
[Post New]08/01/2012 22:34
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Are you fascinated enough to help? There are many poor families right in our backyards who would welcome a hand up rather than a handout. Put your curiousity to good use.


We donate quite a bit. There is no way to explain my fascination without sounding horrible and I apologize for that. Remember in Sociology 101 when you learned about people who lived differently from you? Amish, Eskimos, etc.? That's how I view the poor.

This was quite educational. The media is forever saying it's poor people shopping at WalMart and eating fast food. Yet almost none of the responders do either. So who the hell is purchasing those products?
Back in the day when I had no money I would not buy anything from walmart. I was so aware of their bad labor practices, so I shopped elsewhere.
Even now I rarely go there. Too much like a junk yard, with low quality stuff all over the place, and it is not all as cheap as you think
[Post New]08/02/2012 01:32
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:The people shopping at Walmart and eating fast food are probably not the poorest or the poor, they at least have $ to spend, I'm pretty sure if you are truly poor you would forgo the q-tips so you can buy food
I have family that is poor, they get a lot of food from a church near them (they wont accept it form us) and they get their clothes at the salvation army
One thing I have noticed is that they do NOT drink water, ever. Which confuses me since it's almost free, but the entire family will only drink soda


That is so odd. We are poor and we ONLY drink water, orange juice or milk. I drink coffee at work once a week, but it's free. DD is allowed to have juice at birthday parties she's invited to, and root beer on HER birthday but I would never waste the money on soda, especially because that to me, also means spending more money at the dentist.
[Post New]08/02/2012 01:37
quote
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:The people shopping at Walmart and eating fast food are probably not the poorest or the poor, they at least have $ to spend, I'm pretty sure if you are truly poor you would forgo the q-tips so you can buy food
I have family that is poor, they get a lot of food from a church near them (they wont accept it form us) and they get their clothes at the salvation army
One thing I have noticed is that they do NOT drink water, ever. Which confuses me since it's almost free, but the entire family will only drink soda


That is so odd. We are poor and we ONLY drink water, orange juice or milk. I drink coffee at work once a week, but it's free. DD is allowed to have juice at birthday parties she's invited to, and root beer on HER birthday but I would never waste the money on soda, especially because that to me, also means spending more money at the dentist.


Do they have Mountain Dew mouth? I heard that many poor mountain kids in WVa have what dentists call MDM--lots of cavities from drinking too much MD.
[Post New]08/02/2012 02:19
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Anonymous
DCUM snobs would call me poor. We have a HHI of 70k and are very blessed. I grew up in a home with a similar HHI and I had 3 siblings. We went without luxuries and didn't get what we wanted, when we wanted, unlike many of your kids But we went on a yearly vacation and never went without.

You know those beggars you ignore at the stop lights? They're poor. They have no where to go at night, no health care, they don't get to take vacations or buy new clothes for fun. OP, why don't you volunteer at a homeless shelter or a soup kitchen and learn about what it's like to be poor?
[Post New]08/02/2012 02:40
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Anonymous
Okay guys, I posted and just want to reiterate that there are people that are not poor who shop at Wal-Mart. I shop at Wal-Mart and pretty get everything I need there, and yes I guess I am low income, BUT many people I know who make six figures and more shop at Wal-Mart as well.

I do have to add that I am not in the D.C. area, so maybe that is a factor?
[Post New]08/02/2012 02:40
quote
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:DCUM snobs would call me poor. We have a HHI of 70k and are very blessed. I grew up in a home with a similar HHI and I had 3 siblings. We went without luxuries and didn't get what we wanted, when we wanted, unlike many of your kids But we went on a yearly vacation and never went without.

You know those beggars you ignore at the stop lights? They're poor. They have no where to go at night, no health care, they don't get to take vacations or buy new clothes for fun. OP, why don't you volunteer at a homeless shelter or a soup kitchen and learn about what it's like to be poor?

Not OP, but this is just one side of being poor.
[Post New]08/02/2012 06:49
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I grew up very poor. My father was a janitor. He was home from work every day by 4:00 and we went bike riding or went swimming at the lake. We all sat at the dinner table at 6:00 and ate a home cooked meal together. My mom always took me to the library and did crafts with me. I understand the value of hard work and taking nothing for granted.

I'm extremely well off financially now. However, my husband gets home at 8:00 every night just as my children are going to bed. I have a high stress job and feel overextended much of the time. We sit for a meal as a family only once a week. The only real quality time we have as a family is on the weekends. I worry that my kids don't have nearly as special a childhood as I did.


I think about situations like this often and wonderingiflowincome is so bad that passing on family time and memories makes up for i.
[Post New]08/02/2012 08:34
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Anonymous
Begging on the side of the street or being homeless - that is being destitute
Poor is when your income is not enough to meet your basic need. Sometimes that means you qualify for public assistance and get it, othertimes it means you qualify for it but do not get it.
Living off welfare is really difficult and I do not know of anyone that has been able to do so.
Seems like the welfare queen is a myth.
[Post New]08/02/2012 09:06
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Anonymous
Growing up we had a HHI of just under 12k for single mom with 3 kids from the time I was 6 until my freshman year in high school. After that the HHI bumped up to about 45 k when my mom landed a more professional job (after graduating from university, which she had to do part time! with loans! did I mention she also had three kids at the time!!) She is still paying off the 85k house she bought when we were younger (refuses to let us contribute to it!), which had 3 bedrooms; we ended up shutting the garage and adding insulation, new walls and flooring to make it into a room (it was my high school project; I saved for it and learned how to install wooden floors! My drafting teacher and classmates in high school helped), and turned the laundry room into a mini office (senior year project). I can't recall shopping at Wal-Mart regularly; sometimes we would go for school supplies if the annual summer drive for kids didn't give out everything we needed (it was put on by the local radio station and was open to all kids, no income restrictions). We only ate out for special occasions, and that includes chain/fast foods (anyone remember Fazoli's?). REALLY special dinner was Carabbas or Olive Garden back then. We received hand me down clothes from family and church donations; shopped for furniture items exclusively at garage sales or Ross. My mom cooked a lot - which saves money. I learned how to make small meals from a very early age, and was baking on my own by age 9 (adult supervision of course). It was genius on the part of my mom because it meant I was fed AND entertained. She was BIG on coupons for anything free. I loved spending time at the library, and at the time they had this campaign with Pizza Hut where if you read something like 10 books and your teacher signed off on it, you got a free personal pizza! We did that frequently throughout the school year. We also grew up loving music, so my brother and I would fashion instruments out of anything, and then when we received hand me downs started playing together at home. Again, free entertainment. Local parks and playgrounds are free; city pool was free, walking around the mall window shopping was free. I knew we were poor in comparison to friends who got new clothes every school year and had all the latest gadgets, but I didn't ever show up to school in anything tattered, and definitely never dirty. My mom was meticulous about that - and still is to this day. Everything is relative, so I get that some people on here are saying they are poor at an HHI of 70k. But the deepest poverty is poverty of spirit. h - almost forgot the question about vacations. We grew up in central florida. I remember going to the beach and to Disney (schools gave away free tickets annually), and as we made friends in middle school we would go together with other families on fishing trips. My mom also threw fun sleepovers (tea party themed, baking themed), and let my brother and I stay with very close family friends, which always felt like mini vacations. I remember that my mom did several surprise trips when we were kids. She woke us up at 4 am, had already packed our bags, and we drove to Miami or Ft. Lauderdale or wherever it was, and did a special overnight trip. Those were really rare, but it was so wonderful to have our mom to ourselves, since usually she was spread thin and so busy. Our biggest family vacation was a road trip to Washington DC that we planned for like 2 years. To this day my mom loves to tell me about how I promised her I would find a job and move to DC one day; technically I'm in Alexandria, so not quite DC, mom! Anyway, in comparison to how I lived then, I feel we are less active as a family now. It's just myself, my spouse, and our baby boy. We have a much higher HHI than either of us had growing up, and find that now we indulge in fast foods when we are in a bind. Still don't shop at wal-mart regularly.

Separate question for OP - I am fascinated by how people maintain family wealth. Do you guys invest a lot (in properties or stock), or just do serious savings? Funny but fun thread you started
[Post New]08/02/2012 09:19
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trollol
Member Offline
Anonymous wrote:My family has been lucky to always be well off, and this is one of those things I could never ever bring up with anyone I know, but am secretly fascinated by poor people and wonder about so many aspects of their lives.

Do you shop at WalMart?
Do you eat fast food all the time?
How big is your home?
What do you DO on weekends?
Where do you go on vacations?
Do you have very few clothes? Shoes?
If you're too poor to go out, what do you do to get together with friends?
Do you have any friends who are well off?
What do you do for fun?
What do you think is the qualifier that makes a person poor?
Do your kids know you're poor?
What do they do after school?
Do they get teased in school?

I always watch movies about really poor people and this whole lifestyle just fascinates me.


Hey, OP, if you're so secretly fascinated by poor people, you could come work for me. I'll pay you a salary of 220k a year to cook and clean at my two homes in NW DC and my condo in Arlington. My chef just left to start a restaurant in Chicago... so having to fend for myself really stinks :\ The cleaner had to return to London for a year, so I'm forced to use the local maid services.
[Post New]08/02/2012 09:23
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Anonymous
From NPR: How the poor, middle class, and rich spend their money (via business insider). http://www.businessinsider.com/how-the-rich-and-the-poor-spend-money-2012-8
[Post New]08/02/2012 10:10
quote
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:The people shopping at Walmart and eating fast food are probably not the poorest or the poor, they at least have $ to spend, I'm pretty sure if you are truly poor you would forgo the q-tips so you can buy food
I have family that is poor, they get a lot of food from a church near them (they wont accept it form us) and they get their clothes at the salvation army
One thing I have noticed is that they do NOT drink water, ever. Which confuses me since it's almost free, but the entire family will only drink soda


So I grew up poor and was one of the original responders and this is right on.

Here's another little humiliation from my poor youth. We only had one soap in the tub. Maybe it was dial, maybe it was shampoo but it was never both. and no conditioner, ever. Since I"m assuming most of us are female, imagine that when you are a teen girl.

I too have some of those characteristics of PTSD but agree that no, we don't need therapy. For ex, I purchased a very nice dress for work and then proceeded to not wear it for a year. Weird. I food hoard too.

[Post New]08/02/2012 10:14
quote
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:The people shopping at Walmart and eating fast food are probably not the poorest or the poor, they at least have $ to spend, I'm pretty sure if you are truly poor you would forgo the q-tips so you can buy food
I have family that is poor, they get a lot of food from a church near them (they wont accept it form us) and they get their clothes at the salvation army
One thing I have noticed is that they do NOT drink water, ever. Which confuses me since it's almost free, but the entire family will only drink soda


That is so odd. We are poor and we ONLY drink water, orange juice or milk. I drink coffee at work once a week, but it's free. DD is allowed to have juice at birthday parties she's invited to, and root beer on HER birthday but I would never waste the money on soda, especially because that to me, also means spending more money at the dentist.


Do they have Mountain Dew mouth? I heard that many poor mountain kids in WVa have what dentists call MDM--lots of cavities from drinking too much MD.


I hazard a guess on this. When we were at our poorest, my mom would buy 1 pound of hydrox for 99cents on Friday night and that would be our treat for the weekend. I think it might be because that's the only luxury we could afford. Maybe it's the same with cokes.
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