Would you have a one night stand if your spouse wouldn't find out?

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[Post New]06/20/2012 04:12
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Anonymous
Nope. The foundation of our relationship is trust. If I betray that and then willingly hold onto that information, the foundation begins to crumble.
[Post New]06/20/2012 08:59
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I've learned that life is one long series of disappointment and interruption and regret. So yes, I would. Do it. Use all available protection and no last names.


I am another woman but I think I love you. So sick of the Pollyannas who pretend that life after marriage is worthwhile.
[Post New]06/20/2012 09:02
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Anonymous
Montana wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Yes. But the guilt would plague me to the grave. I'd still do it though--with the right person, I'd have a full blown affair. And I know that my DH would forgive me because he knows I am deeply unhappy with him sexually. And he wants me to be happy.


DO you just not have sex? is he a cripple? Tell us more.


Yes, we have it very, very infrequently, missionary position. He just is not and never has been into sex that much and he's very squeamish about experimentation. We have talked about it ad nauseam. He knows he has let me down, big time. But he is incapable of doing anything about it. In my marriage, sex is passable, occasionally really good even, but exceedingly rare.


Wow, I feel for you....did you post about this previously? You sort of had to know this pre-marriage, no?


I am in the same boat. No, she didn't know before "I do" because he wittingly or unwittingly concealed his low-libido condition just like my DH. Otherwise these guys could have never locked up 8s like us.
[Post New]06/20/2012 09:09
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FBO
Member Location: NoVA
Offline
Anonymous wrote:
Montana wrote:
I am in the same boat. No, she didn't know before "I do" because he wittingly or unwittingly concealed his low-libido condition just like my DH. Otherwise these guys could have never locked up 8s like us.


So it was a low libido before you? Ive always wondered about this because it is stated so much. Could something have happened in the marriage, or work, or anything else that would have changed his libido from pre-marriage to post-marriage?

How did he 'hide' no libido... I just cant imagine having to do that.
[Post New]06/20/2012 09:32
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Zero desire to stray. Sexually my husband is skilled, generous, and always willing. Why would I indulge with someone else? Perhaps some flirtation and intellectual conversation over dinner, but that's it.


I feel exactly the same. Why mess with a winning formula? I'm luck to also have a ready, willing, and able DH!
[Post New]06/20/2012 09:37
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Anonymous
FBO wrote:My girl and I have had this discussion. Sex is sex until you make it something more.



So you have a "girl?" You give the impression that you are looking for someone.
[Post New]06/20/2012 10:36
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Anonymous
I think when I was younger and newly married, I probably wouldn't have considered a one night stand. However, life experiences have changed both me and my husband. Now that I am 40, my perseption of the pleasure and value of sex has also changed as well as the relationship I have with my husband.

I do think I could enjoy sex with another man then go back to my monotinous, routine life. It would be like going on a luxurious vacation. No attachments, just a brief fling for fun.
[Post New]06/20/2012 11:00
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ThatSmileyFaceGuy
Member Offline
Probably, anyone can yield to temptation once. It's one of those circumstances things. Suppose you had a huge arguement just before you left for the airport, and some very attractive person is making eyes at you from accross the room. Or you are feeling very lonely and you start chatting with the POOS that sat down next to you, one thing leads to another .
[Post New]06/20/2012 11:33
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I've learned that life is one long series of disappointment and interruption and regret. So yes, I would. Do it. Use all available protection and no last names.


I am another woman but I think I love you. So sick of the Pollyannas who pretend that life after marriage is worthwhile.


For some, married life is good...why is that hard to believe?
[Post New]06/20/2012 11:51
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Anonymous
Yes! And I have. The sex was amazing and I was really happy I did it. DH didn't find out and I don't feel guilty.
[Post New]06/20/2012 11:53
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Anonymous
Yes but only if it was with:

Daniel Craig
Adam Levine
Chris Hemsworth

Separate or together.
[Post New]06/20/2012 12:17
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FBO
Member Location: NoVA
Offline
Anonymous wrote:
FBO wrote:My girl and I have had this discussion. Sex is sex until you make it something more.



So you have a "girl?" You give the impression that you are looking for someone.


It may be your assessment that I am 'looking for someone' but you wont find me saying anything like that in any of my posts. Someone may find me, but I dont make it a point to go 'looking'. (At least I didnt think so)

Also, you really should read my statement again.

[Post New]06/20/2012 14:55
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Anonymous
No. I would know. That is enough. Sex in my marriage is not bad. In fact, after years of struggling, it is getting pretty damned good. Even when it was bad (shitty and infrequent), I still did not. My own sense of honor demands that I remain faithful to all my committments.

None of that however causes me to judge people who are not in my situation. I don't know yours. Your spouse may be a dick/bitch. Your spouse may not give a shit about your needs. I can't judge you either way. Nobody got married so they would be eternally unsatisfied, yet I see so many marriages where one spouse holds out on the other. Pussy is pussy though. My wife's is as good as any I've had, and there are no extra points for conquest that cannot be gained through persistence and solving your problems in your own house.
[Post New]06/20/2012 15:00
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:No. I would know. That is enough. Sex in my marriage is not bad. In fact, after years of struggling, it is getting pretty damned good. Even when it was bad (shitty and infrequent), I still did not. My own sense of honor demands that I remain faithful to all my committments.

None of that however causes me to judge people who are not in my situation. I don't know yours. Your spouse may be a dick/bitch. Your spouse may not give a shit about your needs. I can't judge you either way. Nobody got married so they would be eternally unsatisfied, yet I see so many marriages where one spouse holds out on the other. Pussy is pussy though. My wife's is as good as any I've had, and there are no extra points for conquest that cannot be gained through persistence and solving your problems in your own house.


Well said, and I agree.
[Post New]06/20/2012 16:13
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I've learned that life is one long series of disappointment and interruption and regret. So yes, I would. Do it. Use all available protection and no last names.


I am another woman but I think I love you. So sick of the Pollyannas who pretend that life after marriage is worthwhile.


For some, married life is good...why is that hard to believe?


+1
Your own miserable marriage doesn't speak for everyone's.
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