I am a legally married gay mother of 2. Ask me anything
![[Post New]](/jforum/templates/default/images/icon_minipost_new.gif){kind=icon}
NotSoAnonymous
Member Offline
Member Offline
| In an effort to try to educate I am making myself available for questions. I will not answer purient questions about my relationship, but will be willing to answer other questions you might have. I am only one person and can only speak from my experiences, but maybe they would be valuable to help clear up some misconceptions. Ask me anything. |
Anonymous
| Broadly speaking, how do you find you are received among hetero couples with kids (not like really close friends, but when you are forming acquaintances)? |
Anonymous
| Have I been redirected to Reddit? |
Anonymous
| 9:16 again. Sort of in the same vein as my previous question, what are some of the dumbest things you've heard from people when you are out with or introduce your spouse and kids? How much of it do you think comes from ignorance and how much out of malice? |
Anonymous
| Thanks! Does it bother when people ask what your kids call you and your wife? Like to know if you are mom and mommy or whatever else? |
Anonymous
|
What did you have for dinner last night?
And, do you put the toilet paper on the roll so that it feeds OVER or UNDER? |
NotSoAnonymous
Member Offline
Member Offline
|
Question:Broadly speaking, how do you find you are received among hetero couples with kids (not like really close friends, but when you are forming acquaintances)?
Answer: Generally pretty well, especially among people my age (35) or younger. I have a lot in common with moms of toddlers, people who have moved here from the Midwest, and so many other things. If people are uncomfortable they tend to go quiet and disengage- that's their right. |
NotSoAnonymous
Member Offline
Member Offline
|
Question: Have I been redirected to Reddit?
Answer: The Narwhal Bacons At Midnight |
NotSoAnonymous
Member Offline
Member Offline
|
Q: 9:16 again. Sort of in the same vein as my previous question, what are some of the dumbest things you've heard from people when you are out with or introduce your spouse and kids? How much of it do you think comes from ignorance and how much out of malice?
A: "but you're not really married" "who is the real mom?" Those are the most common and most hurtful. My relationship to my spouse and children is a legitimate one. I understand the "who is the real mom" question to be mostly one of genetics (my ped even asked it in those words) but I am their real mom as much as any adoptive parent. (though I am unable to adopt due to VA laws I am on their DC birth certificates). A better way to ask if you just MUST know is "who is their birth mom or who carried?" |
NotSoAnonymous
Member Offline
Member Offline
|
Q: Thanks! Does it bother when people ask what your kids call you and your wife? Like to know if you are mom and mommy or whatever else?
A: Not in the least. For the record I am mama and she is mommy. |
NotSoAnonymous
Member Offline
Member Offline
|
Q: What did you have for dinner last night?
And, do you put the toilet paper on the roll so that it feeds OVER or UNDER? A: The sales were so good on fish that we had tilapia and homemade Mac and cheese with mixed veggies. And over. I put it over because my wife has trained me for the last 9 years that it is over or nothing. I do admit to being that asshole who forgets to replace when I use the last. I am sure I will eventually be broken of that habit too |
Anonymous
| Do you have to field questions from your kids' friends about being gay and what it all means? |
Anonymous
| who wears the engagement ring and who proposed to who? |
NotSoAnonymous
Member Offline
Member Offline
|
Q: Do you have to field questions from your kids' friends about being gay and what it all means?
A: My kids' friends are still pretty little, but all the daycare kids know. The one time a little one seemed upset was because HE wanted two mommies instead if just one. For the most part it doesn't phase them at all. Some kids there have single parents, one is raised by a grandparent. So, for now all is well. I am prepared to answer questions if they arise. |
NotSoAnonymous
Member Offline
Member Offline
| She brought the idea up, but I bought a ring and proposed. I have never been so nervous. Until we were married we both wore engagement rings. Now we both wear bands. |