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Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)
husband and football draft...
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Anonymous
So according to your rule - if you are a SAHM, you can't have a girls trip? |
Anonymous
Perhaps they are members of very financially responsible households. The kind where they don't have to chose between a honeymoon and a mancation? The kind of household where both partners can go on vacations, and then go on a vacation together - a mutually respected relationship. One based on "his, hers and ours" - vs ME! ME! ME! |
Anonymous
Maybe they are, but the OP isn't, and this thread is about her situation. Why answer about another situation when the question is about OP's? Who would want to take separate vacations with their friends when they are a newlywed who hasn't even had a honeymoon yet? That is ludicrous. She wants to go somewhere with her husband before he goes off with his friends. That is not abnormal. |
aprilmayjune
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Wow... so because I think that her husband should be allowed to spend time with his friends travelling and doing something he's done yearly for years BEFORE they were married I must be financially irresponsible and a slave to my husband? I'm sorry but you're very wrong, and I think you are making pretty drastic assumptions.
That's a good point, and thank you. I can honestly say I've been called racist, and apparently the things I've mentioned above, but this is the first time I've heard that on here lol 
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Anonymous
| No matter whether her husband is right or wrong to want to continue an annual tradition, OP is in for either a long, hard marriage or a short one, threatening divorce over something so simple. Marriage can be hard. An attitude like will certainly make it harder. |
aprilmayjune
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This is absolutely right! |
Anonymous
To beautiful Mount Airy Lodge? Where all you have to bring is your love of everything? (And sit in the champagne-flure hot tub?) |
Anonymous
You just had me spit my morning coffee all over my desk. HA! Love it! |
Anonymous
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OP here...
The draft was last week and he didn't go to LA. When I talked to him before, saying about the divorce, I didn't mean it because of the draft but I was just trying to say that this attitude would show future attitudes regard to our marriage and these things could lead us to a divorce. Your priorities MUST change you get married, when you have children...if you don't want to change, just keep your fucking single life and do not reproduce! that is it! When we got married, the only money he had in his account was $400 from the unemployment weekly stipend ! We paid less than $100 to the court house and then, we went to celebrate it in some place around with 2 orders of bbq wings! honeymoon? in our bed later...did he meet my parents? well...not even through skype...and now, just because he got a new job he thinks he can put all his bullshit in FRONT of everything???? NOWAY! This is not gonna happen...with me. |
Anonymous
OP I don't think there's anything wrong with the way you were married or your celebration. Sounds simple, easy, and within your budget. Your attitude, however, sucks. I know of quite a few men that USED to be married to women like you. You're getting so worked up by a situation that just requires some compromise and communication that you're forgetting what's important. Also, getting married doesn't make you a different person. Of course things may change over time but it's different for every person and every couple. But then again, my husband and I do things separately with our friends all the time. We believe it's contributed to a healthy, happy relationship. Besides he doesn't like to do all the things I'm interested in and vice versa. If I hate hockey, why shouldn't he be able to hit a game every now and then with a buddy? And me going to movie night at a friends doesn't interest him either. It's all compromise and communication. That and you losing that horrible attitude. Good luck to you. |
aprilmayjune
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| I agree with what the PP said about changing over time. It sounds like you expected him to change as a person and to change his priorities the second he put the ring on your finger. It also sounds like you expected that you were going to magically have this whole different life once you got married and it simply doesn't work that way. You failed to mention what you had in the bank when you got married, what money you had to contribute to the wedding, and life afterwards.. In fact, you haven't mentioned your financial contribution in this post at all I don't believe. I personally don't see any problem in him wanting to celebrate the fact that he has a job now. It's definitely worth celebrating, and like I said numerous times before, I can't believe that you expected him to cancel something he's done for years before you were married. I hope he was allowed to enjoy the draft at least from home. And that yo uease up on him a little bit. You haven't been married nearly long enough to be the nagging PITA wife yet. |
Anonymous
Wow. So why again did you marry this guy? It doesn't even sound like you like him? It sounds like you are only interested in the money he has. To be honest - I hope he dumps YOU. Poor guy - you expect to get married and he suddenly changes like magic? He's the same guy you married, sounds like you just turned into a nagging annoying wench. |
Anonymous
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to the retarded PP,
Yeah right...I got married because of his money (ROFLMAO)...specially when I was making even more money than him (well...he was making 400/week by then). I didn't mind about ring, honey moon, wedding ceremony since we were and ARE very tight with our financial like. He went to his friend's house for the draft and had a blast I guess, since he came back home only 7am on Sunday. Just to give an idea, when he brought the LA bullshit up, we were without health insurance because my employer doesn't provide for me so I was always dependent on his insurance. And now...you guys come here to tell me that I am the worse wife in this world because I think the TRAVELLING for the draft is not right. Honestly...the draft is a bullshit for me but if he likes it...well whatever! I don't care! I just think that it is not responsible to spend so much money travelling to LA while the bills are on the table...waiting to be paid! anyways...this topic is old! I asked him not to go and he said I was right! So...at the end I WON!!! kisses for you all, specially for those in a dream marriage, full of money to spend with friends, travelling all over the world. |
aprilmayjune
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Why do I get the feeling that this whole argument was about that more than anything really.. Winning.. well congratulations to you. And we didn't come here to tell you anything! You asked. If you don't want to see what people thing how they feel etc.. you shouldn't have asked. But congrats on your great victory. You're well on your way to having a whipped husband. WTG |
Anonymous
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Exactly how old are you? If winning is all that matters I look forward to your next post "how do I find a cheap divorce lawyer". If you think that any marriage doesn't take work and compromise and partnership (no matter how much money you have) better stop watching movies for awhile and join the real world.
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