H’s DD diagnosed. I’m kinda freaking out.

[Anonymous]

My H has an adult DD from a previous marriage. I’m not very close with her (lives far away), but I know she’s had a lot of struggles with mental health.

She was just diagnosed as schizophrenic. H also told me he has a sister who is schizophrenic, which I did not know about.

I’m currently pregnant with our first child together and I’m freaking out a little. My family has its issues too, but schizophrenia seems like a pretty big deal. Honestly, had I know about this, I wouldn’t have gotten pregnant.

I’d like to ask my OB about it, but he comes to my appointments and I’m worried he’ll be offended if I bring it up.

I’m not totally sure what to do. There’s really nothing I can do, I suppose, but I’m terrified that my child will inherit this.

[Anonymous]

What’s done is done. Focus on having a healthy pregnancy and taking care of yourself. Schizophrenia has a genetic component but that’s doesn’t mean your baby will inherit it.

[Anonymous]

You can still ask your OB about it, and ask for a meeting with a genetic counselor to find out percentages and possibilities. DH doesn't get to be offended when he's been keeping family health history a secret. At the appointment you can also ask about whatever family stuff is on your side, and what to expect with such old sperm in the mix.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You can still ask your OB about it, and ask for a meeting with a genetic counselor to find out percentages and possibilities. DH doesn't get to be offended when he's been keeping family health history a secret. At the appointment you can also ask about whatever family stuff is on your side, and what to expect with such old sperm in the mix.

But she’s already pregnant. And more knowledge may be helpful for anxiety but maybe not and it’s definitely not useful once you’re already pregnant with no plans to terminate. The time for genetic counseling is before you’re pregnant.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can still ask your OB about it, and ask for a meeting with a genetic counselor to find out percentages and possibilities. DH doesn't get to be offended when he's been keeping family health history a secret. At the appointment you can also ask about whatever family stuff is on your side, and what to expect with such old sperm in the mix.

But she’s already pregnant. And more knowledge may be helpful for anxiety but maybe not and it’s definitely not useful once you’re already pregnant with no plans to terminate. The time for genetic counseling is before you’re pregnant.

More knowledge is always better than less knowledge. She's going to be WebMD'ing the hell out of this either way, she might as well get the information from someone who can contextualize it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You can still ask your OB about it, and ask for a meeting with a genetic counselor to find out percentages and possibilities. DH doesn't get to be offended when he's been keeping family health history a secret. At the appointment you can also ask about whatever family stuff is on your side, and what to expect with such old sperm in the mix.

How do you know his sperm is old? He could be 35 and had his 20-year-old daughter at 15. Or he could be 42 and had her at 22.

[Anonymous]

I think your distress now won't help the baby. Do everything you can to be stress free right now!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can still ask your OB about it, and ask for a meeting with a genetic counselor to find out percentages and possibilities. DH doesn't get to be offended when he's been keeping family health history a secret. At the appointment you can also ask about whatever family stuff is on your side, and what to expect with such old sperm in the mix.

How do you know his sperm is old? He could be 35 and had his 20-year-old daughter at 15. Or he could be 42 and had her at 22.

I'm sure you're right and he had his daughter from a previous marriage at 15. Good guess.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can still ask your OB about it, and ask for a meeting with a genetic counselor to find out percentages and possibilities. DH doesn't get to be offended when he's been keeping family health history a secret. At the appointment you can also ask about whatever family stuff is on your side, and what to expect with such old sperm in the mix.

How do you know his sperm is old? He could be 35 and had his 20-year-old daughter at 15. Or he could be 42 and had her at 22.

I'm sure you're right and he had his daughter from a previous marriage at 15. Good guess.

[Anonymous]

I saw online, gave no citation, chances of having it is 3-4% if a child's aunt, uncle, or grandparent has it. 13% if a parent has it.

[Anonymous]

I just wanted to sympathize. I had an aunt who was schizophrenic and I do worry about my children. I’m not sure that it’s something they can genetically test for so I don’t think there’s much you can do. just hope for the best I know what signs to look out for at what ages.

[Anonymous]

here's one http://schizophrenia.com/prev1.htm

So, 96-97% chance your child won't have it

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:here's one http://schizophrenia.com/prev1.htm

So, 96-97% chance your child won't have it

By that same token there was a 96-97% chance his older daughter wouldn't have it too. And yet.

I'd be concerned that it's more rampant in the family than just his sister and daughter. What about his parents, aunts, uncles, etc? If he was hiding a sibling with schizophrenia from his new wife, I would assume that he's pretty comfortable treating the unwell people in his family tree as dirty secrets that don't get mentioned. That's a pretty major thing not to ever come up in conversation.

[Anonymous]

My bestie had a schizophrenic mother but neither she nor her sister got it. The mom was a real nut job, though. My friend and her sister were removed from their home a couple of times for neglect and abuse. My friend decided on no kids, and her sister decided to have just one.

OP are you too far along to consider termination?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I just wanted to sympathize. I had an aunt who was schizophrenic and I do worry about my children. I’m not sure that it’s something they can genetically test for so I don’t think there’s much you can do. just hope for the best I know what signs to look out for at what ages.

+1 my uncle has it and I take the same approach. I come from a large family and he is the only one in his generation who has it. The next 2 generations, no one has it. The youngest generation is 6-20 years old.