What’s involved in moving to another with our nanny.

[Anonymous]

We have a really great nanny of 1.5 years. She is currently live-out and has a 12 yr old daughter (single mom). Because of covid, we have gotten very close and very attached to both our nanny and her child. When we first learned we’d be moving, we asked her to come with us. My son is so attached to her and I’m pregnant with my second baby. We’re moving to a town with great public schools - better than where we are now - and nanny wants that for her daughter.

We’ve just closed on a house that has a separate pool house set as a full apartment. Our nanny and her daughter are both excited to move with us and love the pics of the guest house.

So our nanny goes from a live out to a live in. She’ll be rent and utilities free. We already agreed on her salary (going from $26 to $20) with an increase of $2 more an hour when the new baby comes. Of course the same contribution to her healthcare coverage. We’ll pay all moving and relocating costs.

Is there anything we’re overlooking? Anything regarding homeowners insurance? Any foreseeable problem we may not have thought of?

[Anonymous]

That seems like a high hourly wage for someone getting rent and utilities free, OP. It’s a full apartment, right?

[Anonymous]

The biggest questions to me are:

How long are you willing to commit to this set-up? In four years, when the little one is in preK, will you will want a live-in nanny or will she need to move with her HS junior to a place where they can afford to live?

[Anonymous]

What are the boundaries as to what nanny can and can’t do in your house? Can she use your pool? Can she have people over in her pool house?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The biggest questions to me are:

How long are you willing to commit to this set-up? In four years, when the little one is in preK, will you will want a live-in nanny or will she need to move with her HS junior to a place where they can afford to live?

OP here. We hope to keep nanny when our baby (yikes!) starts preschool. Interesting question tho. We should talk with her and set a plan if the pool house doesn’t work out for her. Thanks!!

[Anonymous]

It's little logistics you have to think about. For instance, the 12 year old inviting friends to swim in the pool. What happens on a Saturday when the teen wants 3 friends to hang out and you want a quiet day with the kids? I think drawing up a type of lease that outlines rules and common spaces is important. It's awesome you have such a great relationship with her. But lines can get blurred when you're close and that can lead to resentment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What are the boundaries as to what nanny can and can’t do in your house? Can she use your pool? Can she have people over in her pool house?

Yes and yes. The way the house is situated the pool is closer to her house than the main house and gated from our (main house) side. The laundry room in the main house and of course she can use it whenever. The rest is pretty much what we have now: she arrives at 8 and leaves at 5, Monday thru Friday.

[Anonymous]

Thats a huge pay cut.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's little logistics you have to think about. For instance, the 12 year old inviting friends to swim in the pool. What happens on a Saturday when the teen wants 3 friends to hang out and you want a quiet day with the kids? I think drawing up a type of lease that outlines rules and common spaces is important. It's awesome you have such a great relationship with her. But lines can get blurred when you're close and that can lead to resentment.

Good point and thanks! This girl really is such a great, smart, sweet kid that I doubt I’d care but you’re right. It should be hashed out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What are the boundaries as to what nanny can and can’t do in your house? Can she use your pool? Can she have people over in her pool house?

Yes and yes. The way the house is situated the pool is closer to her house than the main house and gated from our (main house) side. The laundry room in the main house and of course she can use it whenever. The rest is pretty much what we have now: she arrives at 8 and leaves at 5, Monday thru Friday.

This can easily lead to problems. Who gets final say when the 12 year old has some friends over to use the pool and you wanted to use the pool with your kids? I know you don't think this will be a problem, but it can quickly cause issues. Btdt as a live in nanny

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Thats a huge pay cut.

She doesn't have to pay rent or utilities.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Thats a huge pay cut.

Not really when you consider she’ll have no rent and no utility bills.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The biggest questions to me are:

How long are you willing to commit to this set-up? In four years, when the little one is in preK, will you will want a live-in nanny or will she need to move with her HS junior to a place where they can afford to live?

This would be my concern. Your nanny is leaving a support system where she currently lives, right? She’s essentially signing on to be utterly dependent on a continued employment in your household. What happens if there’s a breakdown in the good relationship with you. What happens if you and your spouse divorce and the money for a nanny evaporates?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What are the boundaries as to what nanny can and can’t do in your house? Can she use your pool? Can she have people over in her pool house?

Yes and yes. The way the house is situated the pool is closer to her house than the main house and gated from our (main house) side. The laundry room in the main house and of course she can use it whenever. The rest is pretty much what we have now: she arrives at 8 and leaves at 5, Monday thru Friday.

This can easily lead to problems. Who gets final say when the 12 year old has some friends over to use the pool and you wanted to use the pool with your kids? I know you don't think this will be a problem, but it can quickly cause issues. Btdt as a live in nanny

Thanks. We’ll work it out ahead of time with a schedule if needed. Luckily neither DH nor I are big pool or sunbathing people.

[Anonymous]

This was an Adam Sandler movie that was not bad! I liked it.