DD failing all her classes not sure what type of help to get

[Anonymous]

DD age 14, currently has F’s in four of her five classes. She is very smart. It’s not an issue of comprehension, she just doesn’t do her assignments on time and gets very far behind. This has always been an issue, but her grades have never been this bad.
I want to get help for her someone who can work with her on time management skills, and overcoming procrastination, but who does this? She doesn’t need a tutor and this really doesn’t seem like the kind of thing a therapist does. Who if anyone provides the kind of help we are looking for?

[Anonymous]

Executive functioning coach.

But if it has always been an issue, it sounds like undiagnosed ADHD.

[Anonymous]

I would start with a tutor and therapist if she is willing.

Therapist to figure out what's going on.

Tutor to get her and keep her on track. If you can afford it I would to it at least three times a week.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Executive functioning coach.

But if it has always been an issue, it sounds like undiagnosed ADHD.

+1

[Anonymous]

I say this gently. It is May 31. What just happened that you are asking NOW?

The answer will really shape what type of help your family needs.

If she’s been failing all year long, but you wanted to give her a chance to figure things out that’s a different need than if she’s somehow managed to conceal all year that she was failing. And both of those are a different need than if she was fine at interims in early May and suddenly failing.

[Anonymous]

My daughter goes to the Hub at Linder 3x a week. It’s been a life saver.

It’s located near the Lee Harrison shopping center.

[Anonymous]

We are in a similar situation. Up until this year my DD age 15, has been top of her class. She is smart and she is very capable, but this year has been bizarre. Efficiency is dismal. We have a messed up combination of what seems like procrastination/time management/day dreaming and perfectionism going on. For years I've been certain she has OCD, but it seemed very manageable. The pandemic has brought the OCD to a whole new level. The only way she has gotten stuff done this year is by sitting with her at the kitchen table, and reeling her back in when she starts checking out. Stuff that should take an hour, is taking 9- 10 hours to get it right by her standards. Crazy as I've never been involved in her getting work done before. Watching her work is concerning. Can one have both OCD and ADHD? Not sure what help to seek either, when anything she manages to get in is 90% or higher. Just we have a crap load of zeros too for the stuff she ran out of time on, 3/4 done but won't submit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Executive functioning coach.

But if it has always been an issue, it sounds like undiagnosed ADHD.

Is an executive functioning coach a therapist?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We are in a similar situation. Up until this year my DD age 15, has been top of her class. She is smart and she is very capable, but this year has been bizarre. Efficiency is dismal. We have a messed up combination of what seems like procrastination/time management/day dreaming and perfectionism going on. For years I've been certain she has OCD, but it seemed very manageable. The pandemic has brought the OCD to a whole new level. The only way she has gotten stuff done this year is by sitting with her at the kitchen table, and reeling her back in when she starts checking out. Stuff that should take an hour, is taking 9- 10 hours to get it right by her standards. Crazy as I've never been involved in her getting work done before. Watching her work is concerning. Can one have both OCD and ADHD? Not sure what help to seek either, when anything she manages to get in is 90% or higher. Just we have a crap load of zeros too for the stuff she ran out of time on, 3/4 done but won't submit.

Yes you can have both OCD and ADHD. OCD at its root is an anxiety disorder and anxiety is very commonly comorbid with ADHD.

[Anonymous]

1. Make a neuropsychological appointment ASAP at a reputable psychologist's. Stixrud is the best. There's probably a waitlist, the best you can hope for is to be seen before the end of the summer, but maybe not. The report will therefore not come in before the beginning of the next school year.

2. Contact the school, ask for an IEP meeting. IEP meetings can be scheduled year-round. At the meeting, explain the situation, the symptoms, their severity, the daily impact on the student's academics. Ask for the maximum amount of extra time they are willing to give pending the result of the neuropsychological eval, ask for a lightened work load, ask for a resource class where a resource teacher can help her with organization. They will want to do their own eval in house, which will be extremely low quality (which is why you need your own). Without a diagnosis, it's going to be difficult to get what she needs, but you're very late and you need to start all the balls rolling at once.

3. Talk to her pediatrician, ask for a psychiatrist referral. A ped cannot diagnose and treat ADHD, OCD, etc. Consult the psychiatrist. If applicable, start stimulants for ADHD, or meds for anxiety (or both).

[Anonymous]

Perhaps she just doesn't take school seriously, or remote learning has cratered her interest in learning. We've expected our children to function as remote employees, essentially.

What would make her want to learn again? What would help her get motivated to learn again? A new school year is on the horizon. If she is going back to in-person school, then see how that goes.

Talk to her as her parent, ask her what she needs to make things better. Wipe the slate clean for this year, let her enjoy her summer having good downtime. She needs to reboot her mental hard drive.

[Anonymous]

A tutor. You need to take charge. You need to make sure she gets to each class and participates and monitor the homework/due date and sit with her if necessary to get it done. She needs support. Also, try therapy in case its depression.

Do not wipe the slate clean and pretend nothing is happening.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We are in a similar situation. Up until this year my DD age 15, has been top of her class. She is smart and she is very capable, but this year has been bizarre. Efficiency is dismal. We have a messed up combination of what seems like procrastination/time management/day dreaming and perfectionism going on. For years I've been certain she has OCD, but it seemed very manageable. The pandemic has brought the OCD to a whole new level. The only way she has gotten stuff done this year is by sitting with her at the kitchen table, and reeling her back in when she starts checking out. Stuff that should take an hour, is taking 9- 10 hours to get it right by her standards. Crazy as I've never been involved in her getting work done before. Watching her work is concerning. Can one have both OCD and ADHD? Not sure what help to seek either, when anything she manages to get in is 90% or higher. Just we have a crap load of zeros too for the stuff she ran out of time on, 3/4 done but won't submit.

Inattentive ADHD.
Very low processing speed.
A little OCD.


She sounds exactly like my son, whose had an IEP since K, has a processing speed in the 4th percentile and needs 20mg of Adderall to not fall off the wagon (and even then, here I am today trying not lose my mind over his Digital Arts project).

[Anonymous]

I only have time for a quick response but yes, one can have ADHD and OCD. The hallmark treatment approach is often CBT from a therapist and then executive function work from someone who specializes in ADHD and understands the interplay of executive function and anxiety.

Just focusing on one but not the other is not effective long term.

[Anonymous]

I am a teacher. At her age, even if she does not do much of her Classwork or homework, but still rocks out on the test, then she would not be getting an F. You need to figure out what is going on. This requires a meeting with each of her teachers. Are you monitoring her work at all? Half of the work these days are participation grades...