Post your DCs names and we'll tell you what we assume about you. Snark is obviously expected!

[Anonymous]

Leah and Gemma. Mom, you love these twin girls but can't help yourself from still being bitter about having to do IVF and getting 2 (!) girls when you see your post baby body in the mirrors of Athleta as you struggle into a tankini. Helloooooo stretchmarks! It's even worse at the pool when Piper's mom struts her stuff in her trendy maillot style suit, even though you snicker silently how it is sooo last season. Anywho, the girls are a delight-no matchy matchy for you, just subtle things that "go together", you can't explain quite how you do it, but it's like porn, you know it when you see it. You secretly hope they'll be best friends but say things like "I just want them to be their own person" at your job. Oh the job. You are plotting a way to either work from home (damn you Marisa Meyers, don't screw me now), flex schedule, part time. You haven't figured it out yet. Your husband keeps hinting around about going back to law school (in THIS economy?) and you keep trying to fluff his ego with surprise car sex after work (detached garage) and getting lunch sent to his corporate office. You have suspected a few affairs from time to time, but he was really just spending time online perfecting his Avatar. You would have been happier if he had been getting some on the side, as long as it wasn't an emotional affair and strictly a craigslist kind of thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:One daughter - Ivy

You went to Hampshire and DH went to MIT. Ivy will likely be an only child - you were 38 when you had her and you and DH both have pretty intensive careers. You wear a lot of black and purple and never where heels. You don't quite know what to make of being parents - you're a bit too cerebral, but in a hippie sort of way. You live in the city and Ivy will go to private school - specifically, Capital Hill Day School.

Wow, you're good! I was a little shocked when I read this. I bolded the parts that you guessed correctly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mary Ellen
Molly
Katherine (Katie)

You obviously did not realize that Mollly is a nickname for Mary...so you essentially gave your first two children the same name. You are a youngish Irish Catholic SAHM. You plan to have more children.

Molly is actually a nickname for Margaret. (BTW)

[Anonymous]

Ronan
Ciara

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hailey
Paige
Brooke

The mother of these three girls was popular in high school and went to a very middling college and majored in communications. She met her husband at a Friday night happy hour a couple of years after she graduated. Hubby is a former jock who played on a sports team in college. He now has a run of the mill business job - prob in sales. Mom is a striver and wants the best for her girls. She stays at home but is trying to make money from blogging. The girls, who are all adorable, are enrolled in a lot of activities. There is a lot pink in their house. Mom enjoys reading romance novels and watching reality tv. Dad watches sports all weekend.

This one sounds spot on! I hope the parent responds...

[Anonymous]

Leah and Gemma

Mother is an Anglophile and claims to be British, and pronounces leah "Lay-ah," but in reality, only great-great GM was born and lived in England. The mother paints this as "oh, we'er descended from duke somethig or the other - i can barely remember. royalty is so silly..." Still, she's watching the royal baby bump with increasing interest and plans to throw a party in celebration of the baby. She also threw a viewing party for kate's wedding, whcih was very well receievd in her circle of friends. She loves to cook, does elaborate brunches, and works in management. She works in management and her husband works in the govt. he's slightly goofy and she wishes he were more european.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sabine. An only for the moment.

bump

[Anonymous]

Rita
Joan

[Anonymous]

I want the psychic poster to tell me about myself, so reposting:

Ian
Noel

(both boys)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Carter & Isabelle

bump

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sabine. An only for the moment.

bump

You are a native of France. You studied at Columbia and ar working in the U.S. for the World Bank. you are 5'3 and people think you look like Audry Hepburn. Your DH is a Brit. He's a former rugby player, good looking except for his teeth (I know, such a stereotype!) and when he laughs with his mouth full. He works for a British company and spends at least 3 of every 4 weeks in England, which is actually just fine with you.

You speak only French to Sabine and her nanny speaks only Spanish. At four years old, she is trilingual and thriving! You're planning to send her to Maret or Holton Arms. Every couple of months you go to the Round Robin Bar and wind up having sex with one of the traveling businessmen you flirt with.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Max
Henry

These are your dogs. You are a single professional woman who has lived in DC since grad. school 25 years ago. You are now in your late 40s and never expected to still be single. However, you love your life and have lots of friends and can afford to travel. You have been dating less and less as the years go by...but your dogs keep you company. You are devoted to them and take walks with them every morning and every evening with your best friend - the gay neighbor.

Best one ever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Rita
Joan

Rita and Joan were born to Jewish parents in Brooklyn in the 50's. Their grandma lived downstairs, and aunt& uncle lived down the block. They were best friends with two sisters who lived across the street, Barb and Carole, and often when the parents yelled out the window that it was dinnertime, the wrong little girls came in from playing in the street. Rita went to college and became a (non-sex) phone operator. She married Joel, and they had two children, Jill and Glen. Joan moved out to Jersey, married Steve, and they also had two chidlren - Robert and Audrey. Rita & Joan's mom moved in with Rita's family after her husband died, which Rita's husband did not like.

[Anonymous]

DD: Hope

[Anonymous]

DS Kyler
DS Ryan