Live in vs. live out nanny

[Anonymous]

We have always had a live out nanny but are moving and need to find someone new, so I am debating whether we should be considering a live in instead. We do have the space (nice basement bedroom and bathroom) but I don’t know if I love the idea of having someone in our house and space 24/7. However, the few people I know who do have a live in absolutely love it.

Right now DH and I work from home full time, but our offices are reopening this summer and we will need to go in 3 days per week each. If there is a day we both have to commute we will need childcare from 7:30am to 6/6:30pm, but on days at least one of us works from home we would only need help from 9-5. So assuming we both commute on the same days one, or maybe two, days per week max does it make sense having a live in for those hours?

Can anyone who has a live in share pros and cons? Does your live in only help with child related duties, and if so what do they do in their off hours? Do they eat dinner with you or do their own thing? Open to any insights people can share!

[Anonymous]

Can the basement have a kitchen? Separate entrance?
9-5 is not "only". You have to find somebody who likes their off time and won't be hanging out with family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Can the basement have a kitchen? Separate entrance?
9-5 is not "only". You have to find somebody who likes their off time and won't be hanging out with family.

Unfortunately no kitchen in the basement or separate entrance is possible.

[Anonymous]

Do you pay live in nannies less because you give them room and board?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you pay live in nannies less because you give them room and board?

Room and board shouldn't be a considerable factor in pay. For example, if you would pay a live-out nanny $20/hour, paying less than $15 to a live-in wouldn't be worth it to me (I'm a nanny.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you pay live in nannies less because you give them room and board?

Room and board shouldn't be a considerable factor in pay. For example, if you would pay a live-out nanny $20/hour, paying less than $15 to a live-in wouldn't be worth it to me (I'm a nanny.)

Why would anyone have a live-in nanny if you are paying almost full price? I am considering this, but I make $1500 renting my basement. I would want to pay at least $1000 less a nanny that lives with us and does not have to pay rent somewhere else.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you pay live in nannies less because you give them room and board?

Room and board shouldn't be a considerable factor in pay. For example, if you would pay a live-out nanny $20/hour, paying less than $15 to a live-in wouldn't be worth it to me (I'm a nanny.)

Why would anyone have a live-in nanny if you are paying almost full price? I am considering this, but I make $1500 renting my basement. I would want to pay at least $1000 less a nanny that lives with us and does not have to pay rent somewhere else.

I just did the math and $5 saving per hour is $200 saving a week for 40 hours... almost$1000 per month

[Anonymous]

Live In nannies should have defined work hours. They are not available 24/7 unless you are paying them 24/7.

According to federal law, you cannot charge room and board if YOU make living in a job requirement. Many LI nannies now charge what a live out nanny charges, because being a LI is an additional job stressor.

A nanny takes care of your children. LI or LO, her job description should prioritize the children and household tasks directly related to the children. It’s unlikely that a LI nanny will be eager to work additional hours doing cooking or cleaning unless you are paying a very high hourly rate. $40/hour might convince someone to work additional hours beyond the 52 or so you may need to cover your work hours to clean your house or cook your meals. So if you can afford to pay ultra top end hourly wages, you might find someone to work 60+ hours a week doing everything. You’d be looking at paying around $120,000 a year though.

You don’t sound like a family that’s excited to add an adult to your home. The friends who love having live in nannies - what are they paying per hour? Are they having their nanny do childcare/housekeeping/cooking/family laundry? Why do they love having a live in?

[Anonymous]

We had two different live in nannies when our children were young. As others have said you cannot expect much of a price break although a little. For us it meant that we had a close relationship with the nanny and had maximum flexibility. She was always on time etc. Our live ins mostly had dinner with us and we have stayed close for many years after. It is great when it works out for both parties.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Live In nannies should have defined work hours. They are not available 24/7 unless you are paying them 24/7.

According to federal law, you cannot charge room and board if YOU make living in a job requirement. Many LI nannies now charge what a live out nanny charges, because being a LI is an additional job stressor.

A nanny takes care of your children. LI or LO, her job description should prioritize the children and household tasks directly related to the children. It’s unlikely that a LI nanny will be eager to work additional hours doing cooking or cleaning unless you are paying a very high hourly rate. $40/hour might convince someone to work additional hours beyond the 52 or so you may need to cover your work hours to clean your house or cook your meals. So if you can afford to pay ultra top end hourly wages, you might find someone to work 60+ hours a week doing everything. You’d be looking at paying around $120,000 a year though.

You don’t sound like a family that’s excited to add an adult to your home. The friends who love having live in nannies - what are they paying per hour? Are they having their nanny do childcare/housekeeping/cooking/family laundry? Why do they love having a live in?

I am sure this is not how it works or why would anyone have a live in nanny? I make less than 120,000 and I have a PhD (working 50 hours a week and paying for my room and board)... maybe I should be a live in nanny instead

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Live In nannies should have defined work hours. They are not available 24/7 unless you are paying them 24/7.

According to federal law, you cannot charge room and board if YOU make living in a job requirement. Many LI nannies now charge what a live out nanny charges, because being a LI is an additional job stressor.

A nanny takes care of your children. LI or LO, her job description should prioritize the children and household tasks directly related to the children. It’s unlikely that a LI nanny will be eager to work additional hours doing cooking or cleaning unless you are paying a very high hourly rate. $40/hour might convince someone to work additional hours beyond the 52 or so you may need to cover your work hours to clean your house or cook your meals. So if you can afford to pay ultra top end hourly wages, you might find someone to work 60+ hours a week doing everything. You’d be looking at paying around $120,000 a year though.

You don’t sound like a family that’s excited to add an adult to your home. The friends who love having live in nannies - what are they paying per hour? Are they having their nanny do childcare/housekeeping/cooking/family laundry? Why do they love having a live in?

I am sure this is not how it works or why would anyone have a live in nanny? I make less than 120,000 and I have a PhD (working 50 hours a week and paying for my room and board)... maybe I should be a live in nanny instead

Yes, you should be a live-in nanny then. Or a plumber because they make more than you do too. Or a mechanic. Or countless other profession that bring in more than 120k a year.

[Anonymous]

I have been both. The main advantage for you with a live in is that the cost is less. The advantage for me is not having to worry about rent, mortgage, bills etc. it’s also a good way for young women to see a different part of the country for a couple of years without committing to and paying for housing. I’m English but I had a bunch of American nanny friends from the Midwest. I don’t think the hours you need should be a factor. My last live out nanny job I worked at 630am 5 days a week, I’m a morning person. If you do a live in I would find out as much as you can in the interview about how social they are and how much they are likely to be home realistically.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have been both. The main advantage for you with a live in is that the cost is less. The advantage for me is not having to worry about rent, mortgage, bills etc. it’s also a good way for young women to see a different part of the country for a couple of years without committing to and paying for housing. I’m English but I had a bunch of American nanny friends from the Midwest. I don’t think the hours you need should be a factor. My last live out nanny job I worked at 630am 5 days a week, I’m a morning person. If you do a live in I would find out as much as you can in the interview about how social they are and how much they are likely to be home realistically.

Could you please share how much less? What was your hourly rate?
TIA

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you pay live in nannies less because you give them room and board?

Room and board shouldn't be a considerable factor in pay. For example, if you would pay a live-out nanny $20/hour, paying less than $15 to a live-in wouldn't be worth it to me (I'm a nanny.)

Why would anyone have a live-in nanny if you are paying almost full price? I am considering this, but I make $1500 renting my basement. I would want to pay at least $1000 less a nanny that lives with us and does not have to pay rent somewhere else.

PP you're responding to. Then rent your basement. Parents often think nannies would pay rent close to or above what they feel their space would go in a rental market. I live with my sister and pay $700. If I'm going to be a live-in nanny, I will always still have expenses beyond rent and utilities. I still have to pay for health insurance, car insurance, life insurance, gas for my car, cell phone, a credit card, groceries, incidentals, and a monthly amount towards my savings.

[Anonymous]

Thank everyone, this is the OP. I am less interested in the cost logistics (paying more or less) than I am in understanding what people love about having a live in and what the added value is (beyond not being late for work). Assuming I only need childcare from 9am to 5pm two or three days per week and recognizing that this person wouldn’t be expected to work beyond those hours, does it even make sense cost aside?

Do many parents who have live ins stagger their hours when the kids are in school so say they work 7-9am and then are off until pick up through bedtime? Just trying to understand.