Spilled Milk

[Anonymous]

new mom here to a newborn, it takes forever to pump just 1 oz of milk--literally 45mins to get 1 oz. A few days ago i pumped at 2AM and 4AM for a total of 2 ounces of breastmilk. the next morning i took the milk out of the fridge and put it on the counter to get ready for baby. DH asked me (in front of my mom) whether he should put the milk in the fridge and i responded no leave it on the counter im going to use it soon. approximately 15 mins later, my mom, who decided to be helpful went to the kitchen to wash dishes and she asked "do you need this bottle of milk or should i thwow it out?" to which i responded "leave it there i need it" and she proceeded to dump out the milk down the sink. once i find out i freaked out at her, yelling and screaming and cursing - i dont know if its the hormones or stress or mix of other things but i just lost it. i worked soooo hard to pump that milk, 2 45 min session in the middle of the night just to get 2 ounces for baby to drink in 5 minutes and i specifically said dont fckn touch it and she still threw it away. Once i was upset she proceeded to say she's sorry and she didnt hear me, but i still kept yelling making the point that she didnt need to wash the one fckn bottle on the counter. she then used this moment to turn the topic around to be about how she can't believe shes being cursed at, and no one has ever spoken to her that way and blah blah blah. i just want to vent here and i feel like she thinks the world revolves around her. she kept saying "ITS JUST MILK, YOU CAN PUMP MORE, BUT IM YOUR MOTHER, I CANT BELIEVE YOU WOULD YELL AT ME AND CURSE AT ME" whcih made me want to punch a wall even more. she never breastfed or pumped milk so she has no clue what it takes and basically didnt care about the work it took and only cared about herelf. sorry, but just wanted to vent here. thanks for listening.

[Anonymous]

You’re excessively hormonal and sleep deprived, OP. I’ve been there. You need to breathe and sleep. Tomorrow you can apologize.

One day you and your mom will laugh about this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You’re excessively hormonal and sleep deprived, OP. I’ve been there. You need to breathe and sleep. Tomorrow you can apologize.

One day you and your mom will laugh about this.

i doubt it.

[Anonymous]

I had something like this happen with my father when I had a newborn. It was infuriating. I'm sorry.

[Anonymous]

Op I’m so sorry. I know how you feel. You need to see a lactation consultant. Why are you pumping so early and in the middle of the night?

If you can’t breastfeed, just knock that out and get some formula and formula feed. No one should be up in the middle of the night pumping.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had something like this happen with my father when I had a newborn. It was infuriating. I'm sorry.

thank you for understanding.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You’re excessively hormonal and sleep deprived, OP. I’ve been there. You need to breathe and sleep. Tomorrow you can apologize.

One day you and your mom will laugh about this.

Apologize for what?

[Anonymous]

Hugs, op. Totally get it. I’d have the same reaction. Mommas call it liquid gold for a reason.

[Anonymous]

On the bright side, she probably won’t make that same mistake again!!

[Anonymous]

I can empathize having been there recently - especially at the middle of the night pumping stage any amount wasted feels like a punch in the gut. One thing I will say.... It feels impossible to do one additional thing but experiment with flange size. It changed the amount I got from a pumping session a lot. Bemybreastfriend is a good Instagram account to follow who talks about this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You’re excessively hormonal and sleep deprived, OP. I’ve been there. You need to breathe and sleep. Tomorrow you can apologize.

One day you and your mom will laugh about this.

Apologize for what?

Maybe for the poor decision to have her mom come “help.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You’re excessively hormonal and sleep deprived, OP. I’ve been there. You need to breathe and sleep. Tomorrow you can apologize.

One day you and your mom will laugh about this.

Apologize for what?

Did you read the OP? Apologize for yellowing screaming and cursing at your mother. She made an honest mistake whole trying to be helpful.

Newborn hormones are real though so I get it. But honestly this much work for 2 oz? I would reconsider, get more sleep and stop pumping.

[Anonymous]

I’m sorry op, people don’t understand. When I was ending maternity leave I had about 8 oz in the freezer. My mom came to babysit for only an hour or two. She didn’t even ask, she just immediately preemptively defrosted ALL of it, before we even left. I couldn’t believe it, the baby wasn’t even hungry or upset, and even if she got hungry, she didn’t drink 8 oz! It just wiped out the entire supply I had worked so hard for. It’s frustrating but people just don’t get it

[Anonymous]

Pumping 45 min isn't a good idea, nor is that short window. You're going to give yourself mastitis. Are you working with a lactation consultant? What's up with the pumping?

[Anonymous]

Yep hormones. I get it. That really sucks that she dumped it out I’m so sorry. Pumped milk is like liquid gold at that stage. I do think you need to apologize to her when you calm down, and yes, you will laugh about it one day.