Potty training too soon?

[Anonymous]

Is potty training too soon a thing? If your kid is ready at 18 months should you still wait and hold off until 2?

[Anonymous]

Some people do elimination communication starting at infancy. But there is a difference between being totally able to do the steps of potty training and using the potty because parent puts me there.

Much younger than 18-20 months, kids can't really pull up and down pants and have trouble with feeling stable on the potty ring / big potty.

My 2nd wanted to be like her sister so trained early and quickly. But she was 2. I think 18 months would be the youngest I would try but that is me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Some people do elimination communication starting at infancy. But there is a difference between being totally able to do the steps of potty training and using the potty because parent puts me there.

Much younger than 18-20 months, kids can't really pull up and down pants and have trouble with feeling stable on the potty ring / big potty.

My 2nd wanted to be like her sister so trained early and quickly. But she was 2. I think 18 months would be the youngest I would try but that is me.

My LO is 18 mo and initiated this by trying to go on the potty unprompted. He crawls up to the toilet on his own and sits down and he had a couple of successful times. Just wondering if we will regret this when it comes to poop... I’ve read a lot about constipation and kids holding it in when potty trained too early.

[Anonymous]

I feel like you need to choose between the hassle of diapers or the hassle of helping a 1 year old go to the bathroom. For me, diapers seemed easier. With a really young kid, you're dealing with (like pp said), helping them pull up and down pants, wiping, and also more accidents for a longer period of time (they take longer to train).

[Anonymous]

I potty trained my daughter really, really early because her poops were like clockwork- 11 am every single day. I would just stick her on the potty at 11 am and she pooped. Then I would wipe her- no poopy diaper or rash! It was wonderful and it got her used to going potty before 1 year old.

My son was a totally different story and I can't really think of a way to efficiently teach a very small baby unless, like my daughter, they have a very predictable schedule.

[Anonymous]

That’s common in many cultures. My kids were trained by 18 months. However I think the difference is between what you would consider trained at that age and at age 5. I just mean they were in underwear, not that they could wipe themselves.

At that age the goal is mainly to get them out of diapers and aware with some control. You have to set reasonable expectations of how often they’ll go, how much warning they will give, and setbacks. For me it was totally worth it to see their confidence and not be dealing with the psychological difficulties of training at 3 when a kid is attached to their diaper and runs to poop under a table. But you can just give it a try and see if it works for you and the kid. Check out How We Montessori or similar for the Montessori guides, some of that might be helpful.

[Anonymous]

I think, if the child is self initiating or otherwise showing readiness, it is fine to train. Most will not be ready at 18 months, but it is possible for some.

I think the ones that have issues with constipation and holding, are the ones whose parents who want them trained NOW and are forcing it, because Oh Crap said so!!! regardless of whether their particular child is ready or not.

[Anonymous]

I mean, if you look it up, the stats say some kids potty trained too soon will take longer to potty train. Now that has no accompanying evidence on methods of child readiness. You read some posts by parents where they're clearly pushing a kid who isn't ready, though. I think people get too rigid about it a lot. Most people I know did Oh Crap to get started but they still had to keep working at it for a while.

[Anonymous]

Everyone on this forum worships having 3 year olds soiling themselves but I potty trained starting at 18 months and do not regret it. There is a huge advantage in that they do not have the wilfulness of the "terrible twos". You will not get into psychological games and defiance, or run into a 2 or 3 year old who can toilet but chooses not to holding poo and making themselves constipated

It will take longer than "Train your toddler in only three days!!!!" and of course you will have more accidents and have to help them pull down their pants (or let them go naked).

They either need the motor skills to put themselves on the potty or social skills to tell you they need to go.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: I think, if the child is self initiating or otherwise showing readiness, it is fine to train. Most will not be ready at 18 months, but it is possible for some.

I think the ones that have issues with constipation and holding, are the ones whose parents who want them trained NOW and are forcing it, because Oh Crap said so!!! regardless of whether their particular child is ready or not.

You mean the parents who need to put their kid in daycare potty trained and realize they only have X amount of months left? Who waited until they have a defiant 2 or 3 year old?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Some people do elimination communication starting at infancy. But there is a difference between being totally able to do the steps of potty training and using the potty because parent puts me there.

Much younger than 18-20 months, kids can't really pull up and down pants and have trouble with feeling stable on the potty ring / big potty.

My 2nd wanted to be like her sister so trained early and quickly. But she was 2. I think 18 months would be the youngest I would try but that is me.

My LO is 18 mo and initiated this by trying to go on the potty unprompted. He crawls up to the toilet on his own and sits down and he had a couple of successful times. Just wondering if we will regret this when it comes to poop... I’ve read a lot about constipation and kids holding it in when potty trained too early.

Constipation comes from them getting in trouble for having accidents in their underwear. Next time they have to go they have the choice of stopping their fun game or holding it. I let mine have accidents on the floor (he was naked) and he never held stool. He saw me cleaning poo off the floor and felt bad and worked harder to get it into the toilet. Kids have a natural instinct not to soil their home. It took a long time to translate into underwear but I think that was because he's my first and I was doing it with no help or advice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I mean, if you look it up, the stats say some kids potty trained too soon will take longer to potty train. Now that has no accompanying evidence on methods of child readiness. You read some posts by parents where they're clearly pushing a kid who isn't ready, though. I think people get too rigid about it a lot. Most people I know did Oh Crap to get started but they still had to keep working at it for a while.

18 month old takes 6 months to be accident free = fully trained at 2 years and 0 months
3 year old takes 3 days to be accident free = fully trained at 3 years

Who took longer to train? Who was sitting in their own feces a year longer than necessary?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I feel like you need to choose between the hassle of diapers or the hassle of helping a 1 year old go to the bathroom. For me, diapers seemed easier. With a really young kid, you're dealing with (like pp said), helping them pull up and down pants, wiping, and also more accidents for a longer period of time (they take longer to train).

Wiping is 100x easier if they didn't sit in their poo and smear it all over their bottom (and it is 100x more sanitary).

Even cleaning a turd off the floor is easier than cleaning an adult texture turd off a squirming 3 year old.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That’s common in many cultures. My kids were trained by 18 months. However I think the difference is between what you would consider trained at that age and at age 5. I just mean they were in underwear, not that they could wipe themselves.

At that age the goal is mainly to get them out of diapers and aware with some control. You have to set reasonable expectations of how often they’ll go, how much warning they will give, and setbacks. For me it was totally worth it to see their confidence and not be dealing with the psychological difficulties of training at 3 when a kid is attached to their diaper and runs to poop under a table. But you can just give it a try and see if it works for you and the kid. Check out How We Montessori or similar for the Montessori guides, some of that might be helpful.

I agree that the definition of potty trained varies by age. A 2 year old doesn't have the motor skills to wipe and wash their hands. A 7 year old who is leaving skid marks because they are too lazy to wipe properly is not fully trained.

[Anonymous]

Potty training can't come too soon. Kids in other parts of the world do it at 1.