Blonde, Blue-Eyed White Women

[Anonymous]

I am in my late fifties, so, I grew up surrounded by media: print, ads, tv, etc. presenting the ideal woman as a blonde like Christie Brinkley or Farrah Fawcett. Articles in all types of magazines would always mention blondes as the de facto vision of a beautiful woman. Children were described as tow-headed in a beatific angels sort of way. Specifically, I am talking about white women with fine, Nordic features. I realize anyone can have highlighted hair, but I am referencing women that look like they may have been blonde as a child.

I am white, but as an Italian brunette that looks Mediterranean, I have never really felt that I fit in with the US standards of beauty. There are obviously more inclusive and diverse representations of beauty now, but I wonder if blondes feel something like backlash? If you’re a blonde woman, do you ever feel sort of targeted and stereotyped as an entitled UMC athleisure- clad woman, mean-girl cheerleader, or Fox News anchor? Do you feel like women of color dislike you or feel uncomfortable in your presence? Do you feel like you need to signal that you’re an ally and wonder if it appears awkward?

Slightly off-topic, but I think the Kardashians are popular because of young women who look a little like me in my 20s. For all their plasticine parts and appropriating AA beauty, it is still an aspirational look that is at least partially achievable by a lot of Latina, biracial, etc., women. They have zero chance of looking like Rosie Huntington-Whiteley.

Doesn’t it seem like every thread on how to look like a wealthy wasp is just code for white blonde coveting? I am also curious to hear from non-white women about your own internalized messages. I hate the fact that I secretly hope my daughter marries someone less “ethnic” looking than myself.

[Anonymous]

I don’t much care about inherited features.

[Anonymous]

I’m 36 and feel that the fetishization of Nordic natural blondes pre-dated me. I definitely don’t interpret wealthy WASP fashion stuff as somehow related to that. I mean Nordics aren’t even WASPs. I’m a WASP and I’m brunette.

My husband is south Asian and my children are dark. I think they look very “on trend”: ethnically ambiguous.

[Anonymous]

I kind of think the days of fetishizing blonde women are over tbh. Not that there aren’t still plenty of beautiful blonde women who get fawned over, but beauty standards have evolved to be more inclusive. I agree that there’s a blonde female WASP stereotype that’s still floating around out there though. I’m blonde and blue eyed and I’m sure I’m stereotyped but I don’t really care that much.

[Anonymous]

Another 50 year old of Mediterranean descent. Those women are washing out and we’re coming in to our own. I am always astonished at how washed out and dried out most natural blondes get in their 40s. Darker hair and oilier skin mean that we look much better in our 40s and 50s.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m 36 and feel that the fetishization of Nordic natural blondes pre-dated me. I definitely don’t interpret wealthy WASP fashion stuff as somehow related to that. I mean Nordics aren’t even WASPs. I’m a WASP and I’m brunette.

My husband is south Asian and my children are dark. I think they look very “on trend”: ethnically ambiguous.

Same here and I’ve just turned 42. I never though that look was particularly attractive. I think more Southern European looks are a lot more attractive than the blonde/blue-eyed thing, personally. I’m black/brown biracial, fwiw.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I kind of think the days of fetishizing blonde women are over tbh. Not that there aren’t still plenty of beautiful blonde women who get fawned over, but beauty standards have evolved to be more inclusive. I agree that there’s a blonde female WASP stereotype that’s still floating around out there though. I’m blonde and blue eyed and I’m sure I’m stereotyped but I don’t really care that much.

+1 to all of this.

[Anonymous]

I love these threads that pop up every few months. We get it, you’re jealous. It’s okay. Call us washed out, who cares. Work on yourself. Why make a thread about this??

- Swede

[Anonymous]

I will just say I had both blonde and darker hair and the difference in attention/treatment is astonishing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I love these threads that pop up every few months. We get it, you’re jealous. It’s okay. Call us washed out, who cares. Work on yourself. Why make a thread about this??

- Swede

Seriously, people. Get a life.

[Anonymous]

OP, I totally feel you. I'm a dark-skinned Middle Easterner and kept hoping I would turn into a real-life Barbie doll. In fact, in my young brain I thought that the tall, skinny blonde was the only way to go, beauty-wise.

Say what you want about the Kardashians and their Armenian look, but I do think they helped to change the narrative on what beauty looks like in America.

White was always beautiful. And, to me, I would always see beautiful black women on TV and in magazines. But I never saw my shade of brown.

[Anonymous]

I'm not blonde or blue-eyed, but I think it's kind of silly for a white woman to say "oh, these other white women were considered beautiful and I wasn't." Mediterranean looks have been considered beautiful for a long time. Yes, there was a kind of Grace Kelly ideal, but there have been so many women with dark hair or eyes or both, and darker skin on white women has been popular ever since the Kennedies made tans look "healthy" in the 60s. For every Hitchcock blonde you had a Sofia Loren. Audrey Hepburn. Elizabeth Taylor. When I was in high school and college, in the 80s/early 90s, the ideal was someone who tanned easily and had curves, regardless of hair or eye color. Cindy Crawford. Linda Evangelista. During that era, its seemed more rare for a "classic" blond like Claudia Schiffer to be celebrated. Obviously people still loved it, but most of the super models of the era were brunettes and many had dark eyes and skin.

It's taken much longer for women of color to be celebrated for their looks, and in particular to be celebrated for the ways in which they look distinctly non-Western European. It is only in the last few years that black women have really been celebrated for having dark skin or classically African features (with the rare historical exceptions like Grace Jones). Alternatively, women of color have been truly fetishized, treated as sexy and desirable but not necessarily beautiful or respectable. You still see it now, though there is more awareness.

In any case, I think if you are white, you've already had women who look like you celebrated your entire life, regardless of your hair color.

[Anonymous]

I’m brunette and olive skin, though I have blue eyes. Also part Italian

I have never felt this at all. But, Brooke Shields and Cindy Crawford and Phoebe Cates and Linda Evangelista and Christy Turlington and Andie McDowell and Catherine Zeta Jones and Courtney Cox and Jennifer Connolly and Helena Christensen were all very popular so I do not feel like it was a blonde thing... and that was the 80s.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m brunette and olive skin, though I have blue eyes. Also part Italian

I have never felt this at all. But, Brooke Shields and Cindy Crawford and Phoebe Cates and Linda Evangelista and Christy Turlington and Andie McDowell and Catherine Zeta Jones and Courtney Cox and Jennifer Connolly and Helena Christensen were all very popular so I do not feel like it was a blonde thing... and that was the 80s.

As a dark brunette with blue eyes, I always was told I was pretty and I was homecoming Queen in a high school with tons of blondes (bottled and real).

[Anonymous]

Naturally blonde and blue eyed in 40s. I have noticed that if I wear glasses, people treat me differently (like I might not be an idiot). Other than that, I haven’t noticed much about it.