Moving out at 18

[Anonymous]

Any one’s kid do this or be asked to?

[Anonymous]

Lots of kids leave at 18, or even earlier. Why are you asking?

[Anonymous]

My brother moved out at 19...a little older than 18 but this was because he was red-shirted for kindergarten and didn't graduate high school until 19. But he did fine. He was working full-time (he wasn't the school type) and could afford an apartment with a friend.

It was his decision, no rancor or issues with our single-parent mom, he was just very independent and wanted to leave the nest. My mom understood that, having left her parents' home at 17, again not the school type and just wanted to move to the DC area for work and to get out of her little town.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Any one’s kid do this or be asked to?

During a pandemic? You need to give more details but, unless they were planning to murder me I wouldn't kick my 18 year old out now.

[Anonymous]

College?

[Anonymous]

My daughter moved halfway across the country from us when she was 17 and a half. She moved in with her older brother and sister-in-law, finished school and graduated, and has never asked us for any money. She moved out of their house when she turned 18.
I raise my kids to be independent. When my youngest turns 18 in 2 and a half years, I am moving out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Any one’s kid do this or be asked to?

I know plenty who have, but the circumstances may make a difference. When you say "asked to", that makes be wonder if your 18 has the ability to? Are there problems leading to possibly being asked to move out? Does he/she have the ability to pay for it? Does he/she have a substance abuse problem?

[Anonymous]

Plenty of people move out at 18. If my kid wasn't ready to move out at 18, it would take something extraordinary for me to kick him out at that age. By about early 20's, though, it's time to develop a concrete plane for them to move if they haven't done it themselves (unless there's a legitimate reason that this isn't possible for this kid).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My daughter moved halfway across the country from us when she was 17 and a half. She moved in with her older brother and sister-in-law, finished school and graduated, and has never asked us for any money. She moved out of their house when she turned 18.
I raise my kids to be independent. When my youngest turns 18 in 2 and a half years, I am moving out.

I wonder what your dd would say. Seems that there is more to the story you arent telling since moving in with brother and his wife pretty dramatic.

Life in your family must have been awful but keep spinning "teaching independrnce" since she was dependent on her brother and not you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Plenty of people move out at 18. If my kid wasn't ready to move out at 18, it would take something extraordinary for me to kick him out at that age. By about early 20's, though, it's time to develop a concrete plane for them to move if they haven't done it themselves (unless there's a legitimate reason that this isn't possible for this kid).

+1. I'm not looking forward to being an empty nester but DH and I definitely want to move elsewhere once the kids leave for college. But, we are forcing ourselves to stay put for two years after the youngest leaves. We want to be a fall back for them, if they need it.

Obviously, we'll be there for them wherever we are but I think it would be more comforting for them to think of us in our family home.

[Anonymous]

Moved out at 17 for college to a different country, different continent!

[Anonymous]

I must be really old. I remember when this was the norm, and it was unusual NOT to move out at 18.

OP, are you specifically talking about an 18yo who is still in high school, moving out partway through their senior year? That's the only situation that I can think of this as slightly unusual.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My daughter moved halfway across the country from us when she was 17 and a half. She moved in with her older brother and sister-in-law, finished school and graduated, and has never asked us for any money. She moved out of their house when she turned 18.
I raise my kids to be independent. When my youngest turns 18 in 2 and a half years, I am moving out.

I wonder what your dd would say. Seems that there is more to the story you arent telling since moving in with brother and his wife pretty dramatic.

Life in your family must have been awful but keep spinning "teaching independrnce" since she was dependent on her brother and not you.

+1 You said it. Poor kid.

[Anonymous]

I’m not sure what you’re talking about. I’m 34 and haven’t lived at home since I started college.

I’ve gone back to visit of course, but isn’t it normal to move out then?

[Anonymous]

Yep. And I never finished college in a large part for it. Crappy unskilled jobs don’t pay the bills easily enough to be fully available for higher learning.