When to tell nanny we are moving?

[Anonymous]

We have decided to move this summer to be closer to family. We are only going about an hour away, but will need to part ways with our nanny since she doesn’t drive and that will be a must in the suburbs. We have only had our nanny for one year but want to give her plenty of notice to ensure she can find a new job when we do leave (of course we will give some severance).

When should we tell her we are moving? Don’t want to do it too soon as we will need her for the next few months and don’t want her to start looking prematurely.

[Anonymous]

I would tell her ASAP and maybe even bump her pay if she agrees not to bail early. Or offer a bonus to stay on through May and if she does she gets $x. I think she would be hurt if you held on to the info for awhile.

[Anonymous]

OP, we went through the same thing with a nanny we really appreciated, and ended up telling her about two months before we moved. I dreaded having to tell her, and she took it hard.

I ended up posting recommendations for her here and on neighborhood listervs, and helped her find her next gig. I'm sure people here will think we're nuts, but we paid her in full until her next job started, several months after we moved. She was off weekdays (her first real break in years), but came out to our place on weekends to watch the kids while we either unpacked and did work in the new house, or went out on dates.

FWIW, we still talk and see her regularly.

[Anonymous]

Please let her know now.

[Anonymous]

I don't think telling her now is wise. I think I would tell her two months before you are leaving, and plan on giving her a full month's severance. That gives her (essentially) three months to find another job. I would also do my best to try and help her - we got our nanny from one of those "we're not going to need our nanny anymore, she's amazing, who wants to snap her up?" posts on this site, so I think those are very effective.

As soon as you tell her, she'll start looking - telling her now is very risky.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We have decided to move this summer to be closer to family. We are only going about an hour away, but will need to part ways with our nanny since she doesn’t drive and that will be a must in the suburbs. We have only had our nanny for one year but want to give her plenty of notice to ensure she can find a new job when we do leave (of course we will give some severance).

When should we tell her we are moving? Don’t want to do it too soon as we will need her for the next few months and don’t want her to start looking prematurely.

Immediately, so she can start looking for a new job. If you want her to stay until you leave then you discuss what bonus you are planning to give her, e.g.,2 to 3 months pay.

[Anonymous]

Two months before.

[Anonymous]

Now, don’t be crappy about it.

[Anonymous]

I accepted a new job 6 months before we had to move. I’m in medicine, so transitions take a while due to licensing. We had the same nanny since our first was born (about 10 years).

We told our nanny the next day, and we both cried. She suspected it was coming because I was going on interviews. (My department got a new chairman who started pushing the mid-career docs out in order to replace us with cheaper more junior docs, and my division director warned me that my head would be on the chopping block soon). Honestly, your nanny will likely figure out that you are moving when you starting fixing up your house for sale, etc. It will be hard to hide.

Our nanny actually lined up a job within a few weeks for a baby being born in 4 months, but insisted to her new employers that she stay with us until the last day. We gave her 1 months pay as a bonus even though she started her new job immediately. My parents gave her some money, too, but I don’t know how much.

[Anonymous]

Tell her now. With covid, a lot of people are avoiding having help or just don't need it because they're staying home or have been laid off. She's going to need the time. Give her a bonus if she stays with you until a set date.

[Anonymous]

Two months is plenty.

[Anonymous]

My nanny has requested two months notice should we ever move or switch to daycare.

[Anonymous]

Now. You want to tell her before she hears it from someone else or figures it out. I mean, she’s in your home - she’s going to overhear something.

[Anonymous]

How old are your kids?

Two years ago we were in your position and our then five-year-old told nanny that we were looking at houses near my parents (hour and a half away). She was very hurt and I don’t blame her - I totally was in the wrong.

Tell your nanny now.

[Anonymous]

Unless you are going to sell your home “as is”, and your children are all non-verbal, your nanny will figure out what’s happening.

Tell her now. Make her an offer she can’t refuse to get her to stay until you move. As in, if she doesn’t quit she’ll get 8-12 weeks severance pay when you move, plus you’ll post that your nanny is looking for work, plus you’ll give her the best possible reference letter based on her job performance.