How to decline the Christmas Day zoom without sounding like an asshole
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Anonymous
| Various relatives have been texting today asking to zoom with 4 year old DD and me for Christmas. Neither of us want to. We both hate zooms in general. I do them all week for work and want a break. She refuses to do them for school. Also I want to spend the day just with her, watching the clock and logging into the computer at various times. We will do one zoom with my parents and siblings, and I want to say no to the rest but I can’t think of how to say it that doesn’t sound jerky. These are all folks I care about who, as far as they are concerned, are merely asking for a half hour of my time on a holiday. I can’t think of what to say that won’t offend. |
Anonymous
| You cannot. |
Anonymous
| *not watching the clock |
Anonymous
| “We’re taking a Zoom break, but I can call you on Saturday. What time works?” |
Anonymous
| Zoom calls for work calls or schools are different than Zoom calls for family members you apparently care for on a holiday in 2020 when a lot of the people are missing some form of normalcy. So, you are being a lil assholey, so don't worry about sounding like one. |
Anonymous
| DD and I are totally zoomed out! We've agreed to not to not do any more zooms except for required work ones until January, sorry! |
Anonymous
| How many different calls are you talking about, OP? |
Anonymous
Nope, not doing something you don’t want to do does not make you an asshole. Expecting others to do what you want without regarding their own wants and needs makes YOU the asshole. |
Anonymous
+1. I had another thread about not wanting to Zoom on Christmas. We will do one with grandparents but I'm limiting the time. I do feel like a jerk. They are sad about it. But it is intrusive and people don't realize (or like to consider) that they are one of many people making demands on your day and if you said yes to all you'd have no time remaining. |
Anonymous
|
You really can't decline without sounding like an a-hole. If you're okay with that then just say you guys are taking a zoom break.
I 100% get it. I'm completely zoomed out, I'm an introvert and after about 15 minutes or so I'm ready for it to end. My SIL just sent a group family text yesterday asking if everyone can zoom tomorrow at 6pm for about an hour. Everyone in the group has responded "yes" so of course I'm going to suck it up and do it. It's annoying but it's only 1 hour in my day. |
Anonymous
| Just say you all have been dealing with eye strain from screentime and the doctor said to avoid it except for school and work. Then offer a day and time to call on the phone that works for you. |
Anonymous
| Limit the time and pour yourself a glass of wine. 20 minutes won’t hurt you. If you are hard time getting off the zoom, have somebody ring your phone and say it’s a pre-arranged call. |
Anonymous
|
If they are people who are elderly or alone, I would prioritize their needs and say yes.
If it is a healthy and happy household of five, I would decline and explain zoom fatigue. |
Anonymous
This. |
Anonymous
| No advice but I can’t stand video chatting and I completely understand. The pressure to constantly zoom/FaceTime with everyone has been worse than any amount of isolation throughout this whole pandemic. It is torture. I also find the quality of zoom meetings to be horrific every time. What is this, 2006? Count me out. |