I just want love (in bed) from DH

[Anonymous]

Without being too explicit, I feel so lonely sexually in my marriage. I cry while or after we DTD because I just feel like any whore or girl. I just want love and I want my emotional needs met. I just want him to show he loves me. It sucks.

[Anonymous]

If you’re crying during sex and he continues, that is a problem.

[Anonymous]

Whats missing? What donyou need in order to feel loved?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you’re crying during sex and he continues, that is a problem.

+1 That is seriously crazy. I cannot imagine my DH ignoring me crying during sex and continuing. No wonder you don't feel loved.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you’re crying during sex and he continues, that is a problem.

+1000000

[Anonymous]

why do you cry?

[Anonymous]

OP you sound very needy. That could be pushing him away, I know it would for me.

A man should not be a woman's "Everything", yet many women all walks of life never get it.

[Anonymous]

Did he get fat?

[Anonymous]

Have you checked your thyroid?

[Anonymous]

You might want to get some therapy. You have to understand these feelings.

[Anonymous]

My late husband and I went through a phase of this. It was just very impersonal sex - sometimes rough, sometimes not, but very clearly felt like being used for his enjoyment and nothing else. There was only enough foreplay to make it feasible and at no point did I feel like he cared about me.

It was hard to change. I had to make a bigger effort to drag him into the bedroom and spend time just kissing and cuddling before trying to get things going. I had to be more direct in what I said I wanted during the sex. It took a lot of time, but we got there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My late husband and I went through a phase of this. It was just very impersonal sex - sometimes rough, sometimes not, but very clearly felt like being used for his enjoyment and nothing else. There was only enough foreplay to make it feasible and at no point did I feel like he cared about me.

It was hard to change. I had to make a bigger effort to drag him into the bedroom and spend time just kissing and cuddling before trying to get things going. I had to be more direct in what I said I wanted during the sex. It took a lot of time, but we got there.

OP here. This is exactly what I feel we're going through. To the other PPs, he didn't know I was crying. He wouldn't continue if he knew. Part of me just kept it going so he would be "finished" but the above really sums up how I feel...enough foreplay to make it feasible and the positions he likes makes me feel like he doesn't care about me. I know we can't make love every time, but sometimes I just have a need to feel loved, cherished, and desired in that way. Hope that makes sense!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Whats missing? What donyou need in order to feel loved?

OP here. I think I just want compassion. Hugs and kisses throughout the day (and while we DTD), caressing, gentleness, intimacy. It just feels like we're getting a business deal done or something.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My late husband and I went through a phase of this. It was just very impersonal sex - sometimes rough, sometimes not, but very clearly felt like being used for his enjoyment and nothing else. There was only enough foreplay to make it feasible and at no point did I feel like he cared about me.

It was hard to change. I had to make a bigger effort to drag him into the bedroom and spend time just kissing and cuddling before trying to get things going. I had to be more direct in what I said I wanted during the sex. It took a lot of time, but we got there.

OP here. This is exactly what I feel we're going through. To the other PPs, he didn't know I was crying. He wouldn't continue if he knew. Part of me just kept it going so he would be "finished" but the above really sums up how I feel...enough foreplay to make it feasible and the positions he likes makes me feel like he doesn't care about me. I know we can't make love every time, but sometimes I just have a need to feel loved, cherished, and desired in that way. Hope that makes sense!

OP again...I think I just want him to want to desire me that way on his own. I know I can't force someone else to want what I want in any given moment (and I suppose that does sound needy).

[Anonymous]

So use your words. It is so weird to be crying during sex