Do you regret having kids at a young age?

[Anonymous]

I am approaching 30, have never married, and don’t have kids.

While I’m content with life, I have friends who are happily married and rounding out the bases 3-4 kids before 30.

I’ve accomplished a lot in my 20s (masters degree, several promotions) make a decent salary by DC standards, and own a small townhouse in Bethesda.

But there’s still a small part of that wonders, what could’ve been.

It also doesn’t help that I haven’t met a decent man in over year either. Maybe I need to check out Virginia.

[Anonymous]

I would focus a bit less about what could've been and instead on practical steps to build the future you want.

I did a *lot* better by actively working at it, instead of just wishing and hoping.

[Anonymous]

Quite the opposite, I'm very thankful!

[Anonymous]

No. You have dodged a bullet.

[Anonymous]

I had children at 25 (oops) and 35. I traveled the world, got a PhD, many career achievements and awards after having my first child. Met the right man at 31 and married at 32. So you can do both. I had an incredible time showing my child the world. We had fantasy storylines to entertain ourselves through Istanbul, Rome, Paris, and Venice. We now own multiple properties and slowly are building our future.

[Anonymous]

No way!

[Anonymous]

It’s very unusual in this area to have kids before 30, let alone 3-4. Are your friends super religious?

[Anonymous]

I have a Master's degree and had two kids before I was 30. No regrets.

[Anonymous]

No, I don’t regret a thing. But if I did, that would be pretty sad. I don’t think you’ll regret a thing in the end either. There are so so so many paths to happiness.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would focus a bit less about what could've been and instead on practical steps to build the future you want.

I did a *lot* better by actively working at it, instead of just wishing and hoping.

This. Unless you've managed to build a time machine mulling over what could of been and hoping your friends with 4 kids at 29 are secretly hating their lives is pointless.


You are just 30, if you want marriage and kids within the next few years stop the woulda should, coulda, and get to taking action now. Revamp your dating.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s very unusual in this area to have kids before 30, let alone 3-4. Are your friends super religious?

No it's not. The average age to have first child in DC is 28.9. MoCo is 29.2. FFX is 29.4.

[Anonymous]

I had my kids while earning my PhD, at age 26 and 28. It worked very well for us - would not do it differently.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s very unusual in this area to have kids before 30, let alone 3-4. Are your friends super religious?

This. I had my first at 33 and I swear I was the youngest in the waiting room at my DC-based OB. A majority were pushing 40 or older.

I started dating my husband at 20 and we still waited to have kids until our 30s. It was the right time for us. No regrets.

[Anonymous]

I could not have handled having children in my 20s. I am so glad that I waited. Each person is different OP, and just because you have friends who settled down in their 20s doesn't mean you won't have a family someday *if that is what you want*.

I hadn't even met my husband at 29!

[Anonymous]

I married at 30 and had my kid at 34. I can't imagine having been (emotionally or financially) ready earlier.