I just can't get excited or even positive yet

[Anonymous]

I just had my retrieval today and we had 5 good eggs and the doctor seemed very pleased according to my husband. I didn't see him because I was out (from the anesthesia, I'm really sensitive) before he got into the room. Tomorrow we find out how many fertilized and when we will come back in for transfer. (more than likely Thursday)

I was pregnant naturally at almost 40 and had to terminate at 11 wks due to a fatal fetal anomaly. We TTC on our own again and did a couple of rounds of Bravelle with TI. I had one cancelled IVF cycle due to poor response and now this is the first one that made it to retrieval. It just feels like there will be many false starts before I will actually become pregnant again.

I can't tell if this is a defense mechanism or what. I'm 41 and really want to have a baby. We don't have any children and were absolutely devastated when we found out the awful news about our prior pregnancy.

The doctor said that we have a 40% shot of conceiving this round, which I think is pretty good, but I'm still just not feeling it. Could it be all the drugs. I've had to stop exercising and feel like a blimp in addition to all the wacky hormones. I'm just feeling like this will be another disappointment.

Any words of wisdom out there for me? Thanks.

[Anonymous]

personally I preferred to keep my hopes in check just try to take it day by day.

Best of luck to you! Sounds like your cycle is going well.

[Anonymous]

Like the PP, I took it day by day too. After some hard losses, I just felt too bruised to get really excited. We did get pregnant last try and now have a wonderful DD. But I did stay relatively sober about the whole pregnancy, just wanting to take in the experience of each day and not get ahead of myself with too many plans. But as much as I tried to temper excitement, I also really tried to temper or ignore self-doubt as well.

Best wishes to you and do try to do one thing to be nice to yourself every day.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Unfortunately my predictions have become true. I just got the report that none of the eggs fertilized. They are going to do rescue ICSI today to see if that works to save some of the eggs. I am so discouraged right now.

We had no indication of any issues with my husband's sperm. His report was completely normal and he has impregnated me naturally in the past.

It feels like I will never get pregnant.

[Anonymous]

OP -- I am so sorry. Praying for a positive outcome for you.

[Anonymous]

23:03 here. Very sorry to hear your news. ICSI did work for us and I'm glad that you're REs are being proactive for you.

[Anonymous]

OP here. I'm beginning to wonder if the universe is telling us that we weren't meant to be parents.


I know that ICSI works well for lots of people but the rescue ICSI has lower pregnancy rates. If we do another fresh cycle we will definitely do ICSI. On the positive side, if we want to do another cycle immediately, my new insurance will cover us. We were going to have to wait for the 2 years of trying. I got pregnant in May of 2008 with an anencephalic pregnancy. I think I need a break though.

My husband will have to undergo testing. It makes me wonder how I got pregnant the first time. All this time we were thinking that it was my age when there could have been some undiagnosed sperm issue. At this point we have no idea.

[Anonymous]

So sorry OP. That really sucks and you have been through so much already.

I find it kind of surprising that you did IVF but your husband had no testing beforehand. I also find it odd at your age that the clinic did not do ICSI to start with.

I was a patient at shady grove and definitely before doing anything my husband and I were both tested. They also immediately did ICSI since they said there is higher success for my age.

I was 39/40 for my IVFs.

You might want to think about another clinic.

[Anonymous]

OP here. My husband did get tested. The SA came back perfectly normal. In addition, the anencephalic pregnancy was without medical intervention. There was no indication that there were any issues with him.

Right now I'm just waiting to hear if the rescue ICSI worked and that we may have some embryos to transfer Friday. I'm just so sad, scared and nervous about this.

[Anonymous]

OP here again. I should have said that my husband will have to undergo further testing. He did get the SA done with my initial workup.

The doctor said that the poor sample could be a freak thing or it could be the result of stress. We don't know anything now.

[Anonymous]

OP here. A little ray of hope. The RE's office just called and said that we have 2 embryos from the rescue ICSI. Hopefully, they will continue dividing so that we can do the transfer on Friday.

[Anonymous]

I'm pulling for your OP. I had a similar experience in that I was told the day after retrieval that there were no signs of fertilization. The next day, they said that I had a great looking embryo, and on day 3 we transferred an A+ perfect 8 cell embryo. (Didn't take, but given we only had one egg to work with my chances weren't great . . .).

[Anonymous]

Praying for you OP. Keep us posted.

[Anonymous]

It only takes one! Don't loose the hope!

[Anonymous]

Please keep us posted...fingers crossed for you and your husband. Take care.