Which DCPS elementary has the highest number of affluent AAs?

[Anonymous]

I felt like my kid was exposed to a lot of negativity at Shepherd last year--not in a poor kids vs rich kids way--more like, it is a socially conservative school, and kids who are different seem to be teased for it.

That may be due to its demographics, or not. I just know that as welcoming as everyone was to our family (and they were), my kid had a lot of trouble with the other children.

[Anonymous]

So it seems there are a handful of schools--Eaton, Hearst, Shepherd, Cleveland--with significant numbers of AA kids from educated (but not necessarily affluent) backgrounds. I think we need a new acronym.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I felt like my kid was exposed to a lot of negativity at Shepherd last year--not in a poor kids vs rich kids way--more like, it is a socially conservative school, and kids who are different seem to be teased for it.

That may be due to its demographics, or not. I just know that as welcoming as everyone was to our family (and they were), my kid had a lot of trouble with the other children.

huh. that's interesting. we are an IB family who is at private but was considering Shepherd for our young kids. we are a white family and not at all socially conservative. we wondered what the social aspect of school would be like for our kids. if you could elaborate on your experience i would greatly appreciate it!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I felt like my kid was exposed to a lot of negativity at Shepherd last year--not in a poor kids vs rich kids way--more like, it is a socially conservative school, and kids who are different seem to be teased for it.

That may be due to its demographics, or not. I just know that as welcoming as everyone was to our family (and they were), my kid had a lot of trouble with the other children.

I'm sorry about your child's experiences at Shepherd, whatever they were. My child at Shepherd is young and this was our first year, but judging from the families we've met and socialized with in her class along with other ECE families in different classes, I wouldn't characterize most of them as socially conservative. In fact, I'd say most of them are pretty liberal, like us. There are lots of different family configurations and backgrounds that I've encountered. Of course, this is not to negate your child's experience with other kids--kids can be cruel, and I wish teasing/bullying could always be nipped in the bid when it occurs.

Out of curiosity, did you address it with your child's teacher or the principal? And do you plan on staying next year? To the extent that DC really is in many ways culturally still the South, not sure if any other DCPS schools have a less "socially conservative" feel than Shepherd. However, Lowell may have what you're looking for--they explicitly espouse acceptance of kids from various underrepresented backgrounds, gender identities, they are LGBT-friendly, etc. Of course, my experience is limited to Shepherd, but I remember being impressed with this about Lowell on a tour a couple years ago.

Good luck to you.

[Anonymous]

Maybe your child was the difficult one. Students are so resilient and their issues are really adult driven. As for the AA community being affluent is so subjective because the riches and or the wealth can be viewed in so many different ways. I have seen elaborate play dates, birthday parties and other familiar type activites. Such as Mocha Moms, Jack and Jill, Black Sororities Debutantes and other social-activities geared to AA families. They were attended by many who salaries ranged from barely affordable to affluent and as they say in the community the struggle is real and it ain't always the money. Just ask 50-cent LOL!!! #bankruptcy

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe your child was the difficult one. Students are so resilient and their issues are really adult driven. As for the AA community being affluent is so subjective because the riches and or the wealth can be viewed in so many different ways. I have seen elaborate play dates, birthday parties and other familiar type activites. Such as Mocha Moms, Jack and Jill, Black Sororities Debutantes and other social-activities geared to AA families. They were attended by many who salaries ranged from barely affordable to affluent and as they say in the community the struggle is real and it ain't always the money. Just ask 50-cent LOL!!! #bankruptcy

I think everyone's definition of "affluent" is different, just like the long string a few weeks ago about the definition of High SES. It's subjective. However, I assumed what the OP was looking for is what public schools do educated AA's who are financially "comfortable" (also subjective ) and who have high(er) achieving children send their kids. As you noted, college educated folk can have salaries that cover a very wide range so income shouldn't be the primary determining factor here, at least in my opinion. Besides, as previously noted, most AA's in DC with real wealth (and certainly those with some degree of power) do not send their kids to public schools.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe your child was the difficult one. Students are so resilient and their issues are really adult driven. As for the AA community being affluent is so subjective because the riches and or the wealth can be viewed in so many different ways. I have seen elaborate play dates, birthday parties and other familiar type activites. Such as Mocha Moms, Jack and Jill, Black Sororities Debutantes and other social-activities geared to AA families. They were attended by many who salaries ranged from barely affordable to affluent and as they say in the community the struggle is real and it ain't always the money. Just ask 50-cent LOL!!! #bankruptcy

Wow. Blaming the child for having a difficult year? That's rich. These are young children! Maybe the child comes from a two parent single sex household and got teased for that.

[Anonymous]

My child, like all children, has moments, but no--in this case, I don't think it was my child's issue. The previous school we attended for several years in another state has surface demographics similar to Shepherd. No issue there. The day camp my child attends this summer has the same demographics--again, no issues. Maybe we were just unlucky. Maybe it's the age where a few mean kids can really impact everything. I don't know. I've agonized over this a great deal, but finally concluded--whatever happened (and it's very hard to know for sure, as a great deal of it was unwitnessed by any adults), it's not a problem when we aren't at Shepherd.

I did bring up concerns with Ms. MIles and the teachers. I thought everyone was amazingly responsive. If my child could have the same teacher next year, if ms miles was staying.... those are things that might have made us stay. However, going into this again with an unknown principal, and a completely unresponsive parent cohort (I did attempt to work things out with the parents of the other children--responses varied from none to accusing my child of being the problem--and thanks, again, other Shepherd parent for reminding me of how great it is to hear that again....) -- we've decided to cut our losses and find a better fit.

I continue to think Shepherd is a fantastic school. But our experience was not fantastic. And again, not an ses thing. If anything, the opposite.

[Anonymous]

I have to add, because I don't want to misrepresent--We are not a.same.sex couple, and our child is not gender fluid, (apologies if not the correct term). I'm talking about more basic kid stuff, like a girl who doesn't like dolls or a boy who doesn't like sports. That is what I mean buy the kids being socially conservative.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My child, like all children, has moments, but no--in this case, I don't think it was my child's issue. The previous school we attended for several years in another state has surface demographics similar to Shepherd. No issue there. The day camp my child attends this summer has the same demographics--again, no issues. Maybe we were just unlucky. Maybe it's the age where a few mean kids can really impact everything. I don't know. I've agonized over this a great deal, but finally concluded--whatever happened (and it's very hard to know for sure, as a great deal of it was unwitnessed by any adults), it's not a problem when we aren't at Shepherd.

I did bring up concerns with Ms. MIles and the teachers. I thought everyone was amazingly responsive. If my child could have the same teacher next year, if ms miles was staying.... those are things that might have made us stay. However, going into this again with an unknown principal, and a completely unresponsive parent cohort (I did attempt to work things out with the parents of the other children--responses varied from none to accusing my child of being the problem--and thanks, again, other Shepherd parent for reminding me of how great it is to hear that again....) -- we've decided to cut our losses and find a better fit.

I continue to think Shepherd is a fantastic school. But our experience was not fantastic. And again, not an ses thing. If anything, the opposite.

Sorry you had that experience. I'm not a Shepherd parent but I am a mom of three who has gone through quite a few schools over the years and what I can tell you is that the classroom mix of kids (and families) can make all the difference in your child's school experience. You could be at a great school but your kid could be in a class where the personality mix is a little toxic. The wonderful thing about DC is that you have school choice so you're not stuck with one option. Good luck to you!

[Anonymous]

Apologies for typos in the above. Phone typing.

[Anonymous]

You could be at a great school but your kid could be in a class where the personality mix is a little toxic. The wonderful thing about DC is that you have school choice so you're not stuck with one option. Good luck to you!

True enough, but I don't find it wonderful, honestly. School choice also means uprooting your kid whenever something doesn't work... which I don't think is always the right thing to do. I would have rather stayed and worked things out. But administrators and teachers can only do so much. And sometimes the Mocha Mamas might as well be the Larchmont Junior League, for all of their inclusiveness and tolerance. (As seen by the other poster.)

Sorry, still sensitive on this topic, probably more than I should be.

[Anonymous]

I'm not sure that other poster was a Shepherd parent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

You could be at a great school but your kid could be in a class where the personality mix is a little toxic. The wonderful thing about DC is that you have school choice so you're not stuck with one option. Good luck to you!

True enough, but I don't find it wonderful, honestly. School choice also means uprooting your kid whenever something doesn't work... which I don't think is always the right thing to do. I would have rather stayed and worked things out. But administrators and teachers can only do so much. And sometimes the Mocha Mamas might as well be the Larchmont Junior League, for all of their inclusiveness and tolerance. (As seen by the other poster.)

Sorry, still sensitive on this topic, probably more than I should be.

I moved my kids three times before we found the right fit (and I was dealing with three distinctly different personalities trying to find one school that would work for all). The moves were harder on me than on them , but absolutely worth it in the end. Kids are hardier than you think. Our final move was made mid-September with the oldest kicking and screaming. After the first month she never looked back. It did however, take another year to get a "thank you" out of her .

[Anonymous]

Thanks. That's good to hear. And apologies for all my own negativity on this topic. I am also not trying to diss Mocha Mamas. Like any clique, it's easy from the inside to not realize there are people on the outside.