I am DONE cooking for my family

[Anonymous]

OP, are you a gay couple?

[Anonymous]

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I'm shallow and vain. I'd rather exist on half a dozen boring snacks/meals that require little effort than be the type of person who slaves over a lasagna pan and has a tire around their waist. To each her own.

Those are the two options? Eat cold canned soup and be thin, or cook good-tasting food and be fat?

To each their own, yes, but if you think of food as something you have to consume as little as possible of, with as little enjoyment as possible, lest you get fat, that's a sign of an eating disorder.

I am a very black and white thinker. It works for me. I'd live on soylent if it didn't cost more than what I already spend on food. Cooking elaborate meals is wasteful, inefficient and fattening. I just can't make sense of it.

It's not wasteful, inefficient and fattening. It's just not something you want to do. Your black and white thinking, paired with insults, can't be winning you a lot of friends.

Dude, don't be so harsh on PP. She's pretty much admitted she has an eating disorder. Telling her no one likes her really isn't very nice.

But it's likely very true. Having an eating disorder is not an excuse to be rude to those of us who don't.

Where was I rude?

NP, and you weren't. You were direct about how you think and why. I didn't see any intent or desire to insult others in your posts. The interpretation that can come from the kind of blunt statements you made, though, is that you are making judgement on the character of those who find enjoyment in cooking and eating food.

FWIW, I find your take interesting, because it's so different from how I operate. I love to cook and bake, especially for others. I suck at it, so it's REALLY inefficient from your perspective, but I enjoy it a lot. It's one of the ways I show people I love them, and I find it relaxing and soothing. I used to have a tire (or three) around my midsection, but that was from eating too much crappy food. I'm not remotely fat now, and if anything I cook and bake a lot more than I used to.

[Anonymous]

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I'm shallow and vain. I'd rather exist on half a dozen boring snacks/meals that require little effort than be the type of person who slaves over a lasagna pan and has a tire around their waist. To each her own.

Those are the two options? Eat cold canned soup and be thin, or cook good-tasting food and be fat?

To each their own, yes, but if you think of food as something you have to consume as little as possible of, with as little enjoyment as possible, lest you get fat, that's a sign of an eating disorder.

I am a very black and white thinker. It works for me. I'd live on soylent if it didn't cost more than what I already spend on food. Cooking elaborate meals is wasteful, inefficient and fattening. I just can't make sense of it.

What do you do with all the free time you save by not cooking? Am I right to guess "exercise compulsively"?

I don't really have the energy for that. Increasing my intake so I could spend time on a treadmill is even more of a wasteful wash.

So describe your life. What do you consider a meaningful use of your time?

Anything that involves helping others. Outside of those moments, my life is devoid of meaning. What a depressing question.

PP, I have thought something like the way you do. But I want to mention something. YOUR life has value and meaning intrinsically. You are part of the beautiful system that is life on this planet. (I was going to say this beautiful creation, but that would make it sound like I believe in a creator, which I don't.) It doesn't DO anything, but is worthwhile just for how incredible it is. Take a basic biology course if you need a refresher in wonder.

Why is it meaningful to help others? You help them because you don't want them to suffer. Likewise, you shouldn't suffer. Please value yourself as much as anyone else, and allow yourself things that bring you pleasure. Don't look too hard for meaning. You are a biological wonder. Enjoying our planet and taking care of it (whichever part you want to care for) is meaning enough. Some care for other people, some care for animals, some care for the planet itself. Some just work on understanding natural systems so others can be better caretakers. Some make things of beauty. Some do their best just by avoiding harm to others, and avoiding harm to the planet to the extent they can.

PP, try to allow others help you as you would like to help others.

Thank you so much for this.