Would you sign a prenup?

[Anonymous]

Here is the problem with the no prenup arguement.

There is a prenup, even if you don't create your own.

The prenup was created by the government. The government does not know your particular situation so it is wishy washy and basically lame.

Divorce laws are very lame.

All a prenup shows is that both parties are mature and that they do not leave it up to the government to decide how their assets will be divided in the off chance there is a divorce.

I also have a Power of Attorney (even though I most likely will be able to make all decisions before I die), I have a Power of Medical Attorney (even though I may never need anybody to make these decisions for me. I sure as hell don't want the government making these decisions) hence I have a Living Will (even though I may never be on life support). I also have named guardians for my kids because I don't want the government deciding that either.

Grow up and take the future in your own hands.

It is not "true love" to let the government laws determine your future.

[Anonymous]

"The prenup might actually protect her in the end."

I agree with this. Granted the parents are not doing this the right way but I were the "bride" I would get a lawyer and present a proposal for a prenup. There are so many "ifs" involved here that I may do her well to know the expectation going in. If they get divorced, it will be a little bit less messy and if not not harm no fowl.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He could also take all their savings and buy his mistress an apartment. Um! Yes. They need a prenup so that all parties agree before marriage what is a fair way to deal with assets.

The prenup might actually protect her in the end.

I won't even get into she needs her own money and way to support herself.


My point, though, is that if there is so much distrust/concern, don't get married.

What makes you assume the bride cannot support herself?

Because she can't wait to get her greedy hands on somebody else's company that she did not build. It is not hers. Sign the prenup and worry about your own career.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

I dont think the bride really wants anything to do with working at the company.

I didn't think I did either, but my husband needed my help, and I wound up liking the work more than I thought I would. The point is, I would be reluctant to close myself out, since you don't know what is going to happen. Perhaps if there was a provision included that said something along the lines of "provided that she did not hold a position above the level of X for X number of years with the company."

But how were you any different than any other employee. Why not just give you a salary and call it a day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Here is the problem with the no prenup arguement.

There is a prenup, even if you don't create your own.

The prenup was created by the government. The government does not know your particular situation so it is wishy washy and basically lame.

Divorce laws are very lame.

All a prenup shows is that both parties are mature and that they do not leave it up to the government to decide how their assets will be divided in the off chance there is a divorce.

I also have a Power of Attorney (even though I most likely will be able to make all decisions before I die), I have a Power of Medical Attorney (even though I may never need anybody to make these decisions for me. I sure as hell don't want the government making these decisions) hence I have a Living Will (even though I may never be on life support). I also have named guardians for my kids because I don't want the government deciding that either.

Grow up and take the future in your own hands.

It is not "true love" to let the government laws determine your future.

Forget about the government, think about all the family members that will be involved in that divorce case. More than likely that only "winners" in that case would be the lawyers.

[Anonymous]

Couldn't they get one drawn up to shut the parents up? then after the wedding have an agreement drawn up that basically negates.it. that would screw the parents up quite well.

[Anonymous]

Given the tensions that have already developed between bride to be and her future in-laws, I'd say the outlook for marital bliss is slim to none especially if her future husband is close to his family.

If the prenup - or rather the lack of one - is that important to her, I'd suggest that she move on. Otherwise, I have no doubt that she or someone on behalf will be posting on this forum about how her marriage has turned out to be a disaster and what should she do about it.

[Anonymous]

Maybe the family should have the husband sign a pre-nup with them. Maybe some sort of business agreement. Take it off the bride, put it on the husband.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe the family should have the husband sign a pre-nup with them. Maybe some sort of business agreement. Take it off the bride, put it on the husband.

I meant groom instead of husband.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Given the tensions that have already developed between bride to be and her future in-laws, I'd say the outlook for marital bliss is slim to none especially if her future husband is close to his family.

If the prenup - or rather the lack of one - is that important to her, I'd suggest that she move on. Otherwise, I have no doubt that she or someone on behalf will be posting on this forum about how her marriage has turned out to be a disaster and what should she do about it.

That's nonsense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would. I did not marry so I can be somehow into my husbands work life. Why would I care what happened at his work. I have a job and I support myself plus a few others.

His job is not my job. I could no imagine my H showing up at my work just because he is married to me.

Bizarre, what does the bride want to be CEO or vice president or something.

Doesn't she have a job already?

You don't understand how small family businesses work.

There is a very good possibility over the life of their marriage, the spouse will work many, many hours, often for free, and make many, many sacrifices in order to keep the business profitable and solvent.

That is the nature of the beast of small family businesses.

They are very different from an outside career where you work for someone else. If the business is successful, and they stay married for any amount of time, very likely the spouse will have done quite a bit to contribute to that success.

[Anonymous]

OP here.
The grooms brother got married in January. They didn't ask his fiancé, now wife to sign.
I don't know why. But this would REALLY REALLY cheese me off.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here.
The grooms brother got married in January. They didn't ask his fiancé, now wife to sign.
I don't know why. But this would REALLY REALLY cheese me off.

How much is your fiancé willing to sever ties with his family if this type of interference continues throughout the life of your marriage?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here.
The grooms brother got married in January. They didn't ask his fiancé, now wife to sign.
I don't know why. But this would REALLY REALLY cheese me off.

How much is your fiancé willing to sever ties with his family if this type of interference continues throughout the life of your marriage?

I do believe the groom would sever ties if he had to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here.
The grooms brother got married in January. They didn't ask his fiancé, now wife to sign.
I don't know why. But this would REALLY REALLY cheese me off.

As I suspected, they are trying to drive a wedge in the relationship. It is more than just "protecting the family business". If I was the bride, I would take this as a really, really bad sign. There is something about her they do not trust or like. Why the double standard? Why were they content with the other brother marrying without a prenup? If they were really serious about protecting the family business, they would look at options of restructuring the family business.

I also agree with the PP that inlaws can wreck havoc on a marriage. The bride should reconsider what she is getting herself into.