The oddest birthday party setup/situation that you have encountered

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Re Midwestern garage parties:

I'm from Ohio, and it is basically using the garage in place of a tent if it's nice enough to be outside. This is what our family and many friends did for graduation parties, etc. You have a shady place to put the food and sit. A garage open to the driveway provides a bigger overall space than a room inside most houses, and kids can run around outside with adults around. Friends and family can wander in and out of the house. I don't see what's so strange about it.

Yes, and these are usually fun, casual parties: beer, bbq and margarita type events.

People bring their own lawn chairs, everyone just hangs out and has a good time. Guests are welcome in the house, but it is usually more fun outside.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have to say elaborate birthday parties for a 1 year old with more than 10 people are always strike me as inconsiderate to the child and alll about the parents. Overwhelming, loud, sometimes the adults get too drunk. I went to one with a DJ and the kid was crying hysterically. It seems to make more sense to invest a ton of money and planning into a birthday party your child will actually remember!

Politely disagree. Had a joint 1st birthday party for ds and his first cousin with about 250 people at a banquet hall and had a blast. There was games/prizes, a ton of food, etc. No one got drunk because our crowd doesn't drink alcohol. Yeah, it was more of a party for adults (as it usually is for a 1st birthday party), but it was great

[Anonymous]

fun birthday party for kids, but snacks labelled just for the birthday children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:fun birthday party for kids, but snacks labelled just for the birthday children.

what does this mean? only the guest of honor got to eat snacks? or special snacks? or the snacks were only for the kids not their parents?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DS age 2 was invited to a birthday party for a daycare buddy. The family had a handful of snacks for the (few dozen) kids & parents, and then off to the side there were two buffet-type tables set up with copious amount of food - but there was a clear plastic cover draped over that table. A clown performed in the backyard and people ate a few chips and goldfish. After a little time went by, the cake came out and we ate it in the blazing sun.

We were then all hustled out of there, because birthday boy's relatives had begun to arrive. As DH and I left, birthday boy's mother was removing the clear plastic from the buffet tables and fussing with the copious amounts of food and drink, preparing them for her second round of guests.

Weird.

I've had this happen as well though not at a little kid's party. At a HS graduation party scheduled to start about 6 pm, the guests were fed nothing for the first hr. Then there were some limited appetizers -- samosas and Indian snack food, which I love, but not everyone ate as we grew up in the middle of no where and many of the grad's school friends had never tasted ethnic food. 8 pm rolled around and then 9 - at which point there was still no dinner service. All of us school friends bailed at that point and hit the fast food joints on the way home. As we were leaving, the dinner buffet was starting to be set out. It was clear that the grad's parents viewed this as a party for their friends and family and the "school friends" were token invites; we were supposed to stop in with presents and then leave so the real party could start. Years later it still leaves a bad taste and I don't understand why the 18 yr old grad even invited her friends if that's how she and her family was going to treat them. If you can rent out a ballroom venue for a high school graduation, you can certainly afford to feed everyone.

I think you misundstood this one. This is pretty standard in many cultures--you left before hte party started, basicallly. Dinner isoften served very late, and to serve dinner early would be rude, becuase in many cultures you essentially "eat and run"--the end of food signals the end of the party. THey probably thought you did not want to be around them, and were offended. Culture clash. You should probably just have talked to your friend....

Definitely did not misunderstand as I'm Indian too and realize everything starts late. The difference is that when hosts are hospitable there are tons of appetizers and drinks - as the PP said you can easily fill up if you don't realize dinner is next. In this case it was one mini samosa and coke and little else for 3 hrs for a bunch of teens. And the lack of hospitality was also demonstrated by random family members saying in Hindi - who are these kids, why are they still here etc. if you're saying such things above a whisper about your guests, you should make sure no one in the group you're talking about speaks the same language.[/quote


OK, you're right. THey were being jerks. Not clear fromthe first post, but clear now!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Re Midwestern garage parties:

I'm from Ohio, and it is basically using the garage in place of a tent if it's nice enough to be outside. This is what our family and many friends did for graduation parties, etc. You have a shady place to put the food and sit. A garage open to the driveway provides a bigger overall space than a room inside most houses, and kids can run around outside with adults around. Friends and family can wander in and out of the house. I don't see what's so strange about it.

I am also from Ohio, and knew more than one family who had full drop-down screens for their garages. That way, you could hang out in the garage but not worry about the mosquitoes. And parents could see and yell at their kids in the driveway (but not reach them quickly).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Definitely did not misunderstand as I'm Indian too and realize everything starts late. The difference is that when hosts are hospitable there are tons of appetizers and drinks - as the PP said you can easily fill up if you don't realize dinner is next. In this case it was one mini samosa and coke and little else for 3 hrs for a bunch of teens. And the lack of hospitality was also demonstrated by random family members saying in Hindi - who are these kids, why are they still here etc. if you're saying such things above a whisper about your guests, you should make sure no one in the group you're talking about speaks the same language.

They were totally rude. Every Asian party I have been too has an overwhelming amount of food; whether it's appetizers, entrees or whatever, no one is expected to subsist on one snack for 3 hrs. In fact hosts expect you to eat and feel like you're not having a good time or your needs aren't provided for if you're not eating; sometimes you have to convince them that you're having a great time but one 5 course meal is all you can handle!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't know if this qualifies - not odd, just over-the-top. After school (on a weekday) birthday party for 6-yr-old girl. Very small house. 16 kids. Lots of family members plus the party company staff of at least 3 or 4. "Spa" themed party including little pink robes for all the girls; they lay down with cucumbers on their eyes; had their nails painted; full makeup put on; hair done, etc. They were suppoed to bring their princess dresses. Once they were all dolled/dressed up, Princess Belle arrived and everyone had photo ops with her. When the parents were arriving to pick up, closing in on 6:00pm, they were only just getting to the cake. The next week the mom sent everyone the 500+ photos that were taken by the party company to document every moment.

God, what a bitch you are PP. A mom tries to do something fun for her daughter and includes yours and you have to comment on the size of her house. My 6 year-old DD would have loved what you described AND it was a drop-off on a school night? What is your problem--they're 6! They don't have board meetings the next morning!

DING DING....Irony Alert! Who is being nasty?

Welcome internaut! Congratulations on the mastery of the: 'ding, ding, ding' expression and the discovery of irony.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Definitely did not misunderstand as I'm Indian too and realize everything starts late. The difference is that when hosts are hospitable there are tons of appetizers and drinks - as the PP said you can easily fill up if you don't realize dinner is next. In this case it was one mini samosa and coke and little else for 3 hrs for a bunch of teens. And the lack of hospitality was also demonstrated by random family members saying in Hindi - who are these kids, why are they still here etc. if you're saying such things above a whisper about your guests, you should make sure no one in the group you're talking about speaks the same language.

They were totally rude. Every Asian party I have been too has an overwhelming amount of food; whether it's appetizers, entrees or whatever, no one is expected to subsist on one snack for 3 hrs. In fact hosts expect you to eat and feel like you're not having a good time or your needs aren't provided for if you're not eating; sometimes you have to convince them that you're having a great time but one 5 course meal is all you can handle!

Depends. Chronic lateness of getting ethnic food delivered from small home operated caterers is actually pretty typical. SIL is from a culture where you get food for parties from this one person who makes this arcane delicacy --the caterer will do this for extra money and always has some life interruption which prevents them from ever delivering food at the appointed time...I've gotten used to this and it is worth the wait as the food is indescribably delicious and authentic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Re Midwestern garage parties:

I'm from Ohio, and it is basically using the garage in place of a tent if it's nice enough to be outside. This is what our family and many friends did for graduation parties, etc. You have a shady place to put the food and sit. A garage open to the driveway provides a bigger overall space than a room inside most houses, and kids can run around outside with adults around. Friends and family can wander in and out of the house. I don't see what's so strange about it.

Yep. Ohioan here, too, and it is so common, I can't even think why someone might think it weird. But, now that you mention it, I don't think I've been to an outdoor party in the DC metro area that was in a garage. Maybe just because many people here don't have garages?

And for the original "garage party" poster who asked what to call a party held in a garage, it's called "a party".

[Anonymous]

I've been to a 3 yo birthday party where it was called a BBQ Bday party and when we arrived no one had even begun to cook any food. The hostess was anorexically thin and was having a low-scale hissing kind of brawl with her DH the entire time. It was so uncomfortable. The only thing served was chips and liquor and very few mixers. Fortunately I had brought a little cooler of those banana squeezer packs for my kids to eat (they also go nicely with vodka--DH did the driving so...) Their house was open to go into but there was virtually no furniture and the AC made the house freezing. These people lived in DC but actually made everyone come out to their country house an hour away near Paris, VA. So it wasn't as if you could just pop over to KFC. It could have been so nice but these people sadly seemed on the verge of divorce, you could cut the tension with a knife.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DS age 2 was invited to a birthday party for a daycare buddy. The family had a handful of snacks for the (few dozen) kids & parents, and then off to the side there were two buffet-type tables set up with copious amount of food - but there was a clear plastic cover draped over that table. A clown performed in the backyard and people ate a few chips and goldfish. After a little time went by, the cake came out and we ate it in the blazing sun.

We were then all hustled out of there, because birthday boy's relatives had begun to arrive. As DH and I left, birthday boy's mother was removing the clear plastic from the buffet tables and fussing with the copious amounts of food and drink, preparing them for her second round of guests.

Weird.

I've had this happen as well though not at a little kid's party. At a HS graduation party scheduled to start about 6 pm, the guests were fed nothing for the first hr. Then there were some limited appetizers -- samosas and Indian snack food, which I love, but not everyone ate as we grew up in the middle of no where and many of the grad's school friends had never tasted ethnic food. 8 pm rolled around and then 9 - at which point there was still no dinner service. All of us school friends bailed at that point and hit the fast food joints on the way home. As we were leaving, the dinner buffet was starting to be set out. It was clear that the grad's parents viewed this as a party for their friends and family and the "school friends" were token invites; we were supposed to stop in with presents and then leave so the real party could start. Years later it still leaves a bad taste and I don't understand why the 18 yr old grad even invited her friends if that's how she and her family was going to treat them. If you can rent out a ballroom venue for a high school graduation, you can certainly afford to feed everyone.

Okay - just a different perspective - that timing is totally standard for Indian parties. I wouldn't come to the conclusion based on the food alone. In fact, serving dinner too early is seen as pushing your guests out; two rounds of food is meant to be hospitable to people for the whole duration of the party. I am so sorry it came across like that. I bet theirr families thought you didn't like being around their family and left early for that reason. Again, dinner service at 9 or 10 is totally standard for a big Indian party. Also, a party starting at six, guests aren't expected to arrive until 7 at least. Everyone is told to come at the same time. (Indian Standard Time, as we call it). Please don't stew on that - they weren't being rude, it's just that the cultural norms are different than what you're used to. That being said, your friend probably should have warned you. At my mehndi (pre-wedding party) some of my non-Indian guests didn't realize dinner was coming (at 9) and loaded up on appetizers. For the wedding the next day, word was out that there was going to be dinner served later, so people paced themselves appropriately.

First PP here. What you describe is not what we experienced.

Snacks for first round of guests: Chips & salsa, goldfish, cheese & crackers. Birthday cake.

We were then told the party was over. We were, literally, hustled out of there. We were clearly not invited to/included in the second round.

Food for second round of guests (family & adult friends from what I could tell): deli sandwiches, fruit platter, pasta salad, dips, crudites, and the like.

There were definitely two parties happening, and one was a lot more hospitable than the other.

I don't understand why they happened on the same day or in the same time frame, made no sense to me. As hostess I would have felt humiliated to have a plastic-covered table with off-limits food visible to round 1 guests.

Oh, the hosts of YOUR party were crazy. The next PP's hosts weren't being rude, though. What you experienced was bonkers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Every birthday party our son has been invited to has been wonderful in its own way, and we are grateful for every invitation. And I'm not saying that in an ironic or snarky way.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DS age 2 was invited to a birthday party for a daycare buddy. The family had a handful of snacks for the (few dozen) kids & parents, and then off to the side there were two buffet-type tables set up with copious amount of food - but there was a clear plastic cover draped over that table. A clown performed in the backyard and people ate a few chips and goldfish. After a little time went by, the cake came out and we ate it in the blazing sun.

We were then all hustled out of there, because birthday boy's relatives had begun to arrive. As DH and I left, birthday boy's mother was removing the clear plastic from the buffet tables and fussing with the copious amounts of food and drink, preparing them for her second round of guests.

Weird.

I've had this happen as well though not at a little kid's party. At a HS graduation party scheduled to start about 6 pm, the guests were fed nothing for the first hr. Then there were some limited appetizers -- samosas and Indian snack food, which I love, but not everyone ate as we grew up in the middle of no where and many of the grad's school friends had never tasted ethnic food. 8 pm rolled around and then 9 - at which point there was still no dinner service. All of us school friends bailed at that point and hit the fast food joints on the way home. As we were leaving, the dinner buffet was starting to be set out. It was clear that the grad's parents viewed this as a party for their friends and family and the "school friends" were token invites; we were supposed to stop in with presents and then leave so the real party could start. Years later it still leaves a bad taste and I don't understand why the 18 yr old grad even invited her friends if that's how she and her family was going to treat them. If you can rent out a ballroom venue for a high school graduation, you can certainly afford to feed everyone.

I think you misundstood this one. This is pretty standard in many cultures--you left before hte party started, basicallly. Dinner isoften served very late, and to serve dinner early would be rude, becuase in many cultures you essentially "eat and run"--the end of food signals the end of the party. THey probably thought you did not want to be around them, and were offended. Culture clash. You should probably just have talked to your friend....

Definitely did not misunderstand as I'm Indian too and realize everything starts late. The difference is that when hosts are hospitable there are tons of appetizers and drinks - as the PP said you can easily fill up if you don't realize dinner is next. In this case it was one mini samosa and coke and little else for 3 hrs for a bunch of teens. And the lack of hospitality was also demonstrated by random family members saying in Hindi - who are these kids, why are they still here etc. if you're saying such things above a whisper about your guests, you should make sure no one in the group you're talking about speaks the same language.[/quote


OK, you're right. THey were being jerks. Not clear fromthe first post, but clear now!

Yeah, I agree. But the way you described it surprises me - certainly you knew that it was the custom to have dinner late? A couple of nasty aunties complaining about the non-Indian friends doesn't mean that it was intentional...I hope. And "samosas and Indian snack food"...I think chaat, pakoras, samosas, etc...not one mini-samosa.

[Anonymous]

Most bizarre party was one my DD was not invited to. Every other girl in her 4th grade class was (invites are not supposed to be handed out in class, ha!) Anyway, the birthday girl and her 14 friends were picked up at school on a Friday by a white stretch limo. They were given feather boas and fancy masks and bottles of bubbles. I was picking up my DD so I witnessed this scene. DD was not sad she didn't get invited, she couldn't stand the birthday girl, and she wasn't afraid to show it. Most of the girls that were in the limo couldn't stand her either. Next day on facebook all the pictures were posted. Nothing like 9 year old girls drinking apple cider out of champagne flutes and posing like drunk tramps! I mean over the top stuff! Funny thing is this girl ended up moving away a few years later, and her mom threw a going away party for her at school, then posted pictures making it seem as if the school threw her the party!! Then when they got to their new town, she threw her a "welcome" party and again made it seem as if the entire street gave her precious DD an elaborate party. UGG!