The oddest birthday party setup/situation that you have encountered

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm from upstate NY and we had parties in the garage too. Most of the houses are pretty old (100+ years), central air is not common, and open floor plans are rare. It's hard to throw a good party in the houses there. The garage (with shade and a level floor) is really the most comfortable place for an uber casual gathering. In DH's hometown, it's very common to use a large screen door for your garage in the summer and use it as an outdoor living space.

Another Upstater-- my parents and many of our friends' families did this, too. It's kind of a diy version of a "Florida Room." Not everyone has a billion dollars for a giant house! This garage-as-extra-room dealio is called (at least in my family's neighborhood) an "Italian Patio."

[Anonymous]

Not cool.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not cool.

You mean me? These are Italians and Italian-Americans calling them that, in case that makes the lack of PC less painful!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DS age 2 was invited to a birthday party for a daycare buddy. The family had a handful of snacks for the (few dozen) kids & parents, and then off to the side there were two buffet-type tables set up with copious amount of food - but there was a clear plastic cover draped over that table. A clown performed in the backyard and people ate a few chips and goldfish. After a little time went by, the cake came out and we ate it in the blazing sun.

We were then all hustled out of there, because birthday boy's relatives had begun to arrive. As DH and I left, birthday boy's mother was removing the clear plastic from the buffet tables and fussing with the copious amounts of food and drink, preparing them for her second round of guests.

Weird.

I've had this happen as well though not at a little kid's party. At a HS graduation party scheduled to start about 6 pm, the guests were fed nothing for the first hr. Then there were some limited appetizers -- samosas and Indian snack food, which I love, but not everyone ate as we grew up in the middle of no where and many of the grad's school friends had never tasted ethnic food. 8 pm rolled around and then 9 - at which point there was still no dinner service. All of us school friends bailed at that point and hit the fast food joints on the way home. As we were leaving, the dinner buffet was starting to be set out. It was clear that the grad's parents viewed this as a party for their friends and family and the "school friends" were token invites; we were supposed to stop in with presents and then leave so the real party could start. Years later it still leaves a bad taste and I don't understand why the 18 yr old grad even invited her friends if that's how she and her family was going to treat them. If you can rent out a ballroom venue for a high school graduation, you can certainly afford to feed everyone.

Yes, you were not "tokens," just ignorant of Indian customs, or African for that matter (which a much the same). Nothing starts on time. If you show up early you are seen as rude. Food is served very, very late (don't arrive hungry) and the party ends late. You left before the party even started.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm from Ohio and have spent time in upstate NY including college. Have never been to a garage party or heard of it until now. Why can't people hang out on the porch/patio and inside the house? The garage is for cars and storing your mower.

I'm the first upstate poster. The parties aren't called "garage parties", it is just that you use your garage for part of the set-up. People do hang out on the porch/patio and inside the house too. It's just that the houses are not conducive to parties because there's no central air and usually small rooms. Plus, in my experience, a small family gathering on the weekend involves 60+ people (the whole family is in the area) and doesn't have a start or end time. I remember parties starting around noon and ending well past midnight. A buffet of food is often set up in the (clean) garage because there are fewer bugs, guaranteed shade, more level ground, and who knows when in this long time frame it might rain. Plus, a lot of the time there's a second refrigerator in the garage stocked with beer, soda, and a place to put the salads that shouldn't be out in the heat. There are usually tables set up for people to eat in the garage, but they also eat on the front porch, patio, picnic tables in the backyard. It is a little trashy but it's also really common and practical. It's not like we're talking about a wedding here.

[Anonymous]

Well, except that the PP had mentioned that she was Indian as well, and very familiar with how such events usually happen. The hosts just sounded rude.

[Anonymous]

Most of the parties we've gone to for friends of DS, or my friends' kids, have involved the kids running around outside (or inside if the weather is bad), plenty of food for everyone (kids and adults), maybe an activity or two, and cake. One had a bouncy castle, another had a small mobile petting zoo. So far none have been supremely over the top. And none have been of the "too little food, no one allowed inside" variety. Thankfully.

[Anonymous]

I went to a 3yo b-day party that started at 12pm and the only food served was popcorn, cake and ice cream. The kids were crabby, starving and hopped up on sugar by the time the party ended.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DD's sister had pretty odd parties for her kids. You had to follow her rules. 1. No shoes in the house 2. You are only allowed to drink water bottles that she provides 3. Her DH will BBQ your hamburger but you can only have one and he will only cook one at a time. You must wait in line for your burger. My favorite rule is 4. You must stick to her child's gift registry for presents. If you don't you will be called out in front of everyone and you will be returning the gift and replacing it. Of course by the time her eldest was 4, people stopped coming to the parties! The most recent one was held at a pizza parlor and was pretty subdued.

Crazy. I have seen people enforce the water bottle rule at teenagers' parties. The hosts will typically buy water bottles of a brand that isn't popular and those are the only bottles allowed in - prevents teens from sneaking in alcohol in a Deer Park bottle bc the parents would know right away, as they didn't buy the DP brand. If this concern is arising at a 4 yr old's party - they need new friends.

I'm going to have to remember this in ten years! Great idea actually!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most bizarre party was one my DD was not invited to. Every other girl in her 4th grade class was (invites are not supposed to be handed out in class, ha!) Anyway, the birthday girl and her 14 friends were picked up at school on a Friday by a white stretch limo. They were given feather boas and fancy masks and bottles of bubbles. I was picking up my DD so I witnessed this scene. DD was not sad she didn't get invited, she couldn't stand the birthday girl, and she wasn't afraid to show it. Most of the girls that were in the limo couldn't stand her either. Next day on facebook all the pictures were posted. Nothing like 9 year old girls drinking apple cider out of champagne flutes and posing like drunk tramps! I mean over the top stuff! Funny thing is this girl ended up moving away a few years later, and her mom threw a going away party for her at school, then posted pictures making it seem as if the school threw her the party!! Then when they got to their new town, she threw her a "welcome" party and again made it seem as if the entire street gave her precious DD an elaborate party. UGG!

I don't think you get to complain about someone else's party when your child behaves poorly and you, apparently, are proud of that fact.

And I don't think you get to claim that the birthday girl's friends couldn't stand her. Sounds like sour grapes to me.

Whatever, the little girl was nasty to everyone. She bullied my daughter all year. That is why she didn't like her. My DD did not behave poorly. I teach my DD not to put up with people who treat her like crap. So, she didn't have a problem giving it right back to this girl. And the reason why I said that the other kids didn't like her is because THEY DIDN'T!! Her mother taught her to be snotty and inconsiderate of others, but the ritzy parties she had were hard to say no too. Sour grapes? Sorry, I wouldn't have let my DD go to the party even if she had been asked. Sounds to me like YOU have participated in this kind of over the top party in the past (including the exclusion of ONE child in the class), and you are a little defensive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Re parties that are held outdoors:

My husband is from the Midwest, and we've attended parties back there where teh entire party is held either in the garage or a garage/driveway/outside combo. I thought it was the saddest thing like maybe the people had just moved in and had not yet had their houses set up to entertain, and wondered why the heck these folks didn't just wait to entertain until they were ready. I admired all the other guests and how they could "pretend" that this was wonderfully fun when, really, it was kind of sad and boring and not really fun to be in a party in someone's garage. I thought everyone was just more loose and flexible and easygoing than I, and reminded myself to just loosen up and enjoy it.

COME TO FIND OUT: per my husband, this is customary. It's basically done all the freaking time, like for Memorial Day picnics, Indy 500 parties, Labor Day, housewarming, BBQs, you name it. I call it a "garage party" but I don't know if they have an official name for it. I don't know WHY the heck they do it. My DH was so used to it he cannot even explain really why, except maybe to prevent everyone from making a mess inside your house? But then I say, then why hold a party at all?? He cannot really explailn it.

So, this is all to say: this is the weirdest type of party I have been too!! A Midwestern "garage" party: a party of any sort which is basically held in the garage! Yuck!

Have lived for 15 years in the Midwest and have never seen this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm from Ohio and have spent time in upstate NY including college. Have never been to a garage party or heard of it until now. Why can't people hang out on the porch/patio and inside the house? The garage is for cars and storing your mower.

I'm the first upstate poster. The parties aren't called "garage parties", it is just that you use your garage for part of the set-up. People do hang out on the porch/patio and inside the house too. It's just that the houses are not conducive to parties because there's no central air and usually small rooms. Plus, in my experience, a small family gathering on the weekend involves 60+ people (the whole family is in the area) and doesn't have a start or end time. I remember parties starting around noon and ending well past midnight. A buffet of food is often set up in the (clean) garage because there are fewer bugs, guaranteed shade, more level ground, and who knows when in this long time frame it might rain. Plus, a lot of the time there's a second refrigerator in the garage stocked with beer, soda, and a place to put the salads that shouldn't be out in the heat. There are usually tables set up for people to eat in the garage, but they also eat on the front porch, patio, picnic tables in the backyard. It is a little trashy but it's also really common and practical. It's not like we're talking about a wedding here.

This is how our parties were in Pennsylvania as well. I never gave it much thought until now. Just thought everyone did this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can cite many examples of ginormous Cleveland Park homes (usually paid for or owned by grandparents since the couple with the kid usually worked for politically perfect ngo's or had cutsie "cool jobs" as documentary producers or some such sh*t) where there were "stations" for the 3-4 yo to shuttle through, an elaborate spongy or felt "craft"and a hay maze in the backyard. In 90º weather, they eccentrically had no air conditioning in the house and I had to beg the hostess for a dusty glass of tepid tap water. Then there was there was the party in the Palisades at a 4 story, Martha Stewart perfect mansion complete with 4 flights of tightly winding stairs (which was awesome to navigate with 3 yo) Of course, there were "station activities" on each floor. The crowning moment was when the hostess stood in front of the group bewildered parents that had been sequestered to the back porch. She forced us to all smoosh in together and say: "cheese" for a photo-op with her GIGANTIC Canon 7D that was so unwieldy that as she went to focus the lens she lost her footing and fell face first down into the porch in front us and actually smashed the camera to the floor. I don't generally laugh at such things but, many snickers were stifled while feigning attempts were made to help her get off the ground. She was physically unhurt but her pride and her 3k+ Canon were totaled. If the hostess is reading this now, just know you will NEVER be forgotten.

Wow, why so full of contempt? Your post is pretty vile. You're the one that sounds full of yourself.

[Anonymous]

The garage parties sound awesome and make me sad that I don't live closer to my family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Most bizarre party was one my DD was not invited to. Every other girl in her 4th grade class was (invites are not supposed to be handed out in class, ha!) Anyway, the birthday girl and her 14 friends were picked up at school on a Friday by a white stretch limo. They were given feather boas and fancy masks and bottles of bubbles. I was picking up my DD so I witnessed this scene. DD was not sad she didn't get invited, she couldn't stand the birthday girl, and she wasn't afraid to show it. Most of the girls that were in the limo couldn't stand her either. Next day on facebook all the pictures were posted. Nothing like 9 year old girls drinking apple cider out of champagne flutes and posing like drunk tramps! I mean over the top stuff! Funny thing is this girl ended up moving away a few years later, and her mom threw a going away party for her at school, then posted pictures making it seem as if the school threw her the party!! Then when they got to their new town, she threw her a "welcome" party and again made it seem as if the entire street gave her precious DD an elaborate party. UGG!

PP. It does sound like this mom was a grasping desperate pia--but you really don't look much better having apparently catalogued in your mind every single social event in this child's life. Why don't you un-friend her on stupid FB and get on with your life and stop following a person whose kid and mom you don't like and who has moved to a different town!