Husband doesn't want to leave our kids much in inheritence

[Anonymous]

The problem with leaving monies with charities is that many times the mission of the charity changes contrary to what the donor's intent was. I've seen this a lot.

As a family we have stopped donating to colleges in the US about 10 years ago.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Luckily, women tend to outlive men, so odds are you can change it when he's gone.

Yeah great plan. Make sure to feed him high fat/high sugar meals to speed up the process.

[Anonymous]

He needs to donate the money now to avoid the debate about the estate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The problem with leaving monies with charities is that many times the mission of the charity changes contrary to what the donor's intent was. I've seen this a lot.

As a family we have stopped donating to colleges in the US about 10 years ago.

Literally the same problem that donating money to children has.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The problem with leaving monies with charities is that many times the mission of the charity changes contrary to what the donor's intent was. I've seen this a lot.

As a family we have stopped donating to colleges in the US about 10 years ago.

As someone who has spent her whole career working for non-profits / charities, this is absolutely true. Do not leave your money to charities if it is a bequest in the millions. They'll go through a 300,000 donation in a year or two, so as long as you are keeping tabs on the organization, it's fine to leave this amount.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why would someone earn all that money if not to leave it to kids? seriously

This is not one of my goals at all.

I suspect it depends on how you were raised. The expectation in my family is that everyone would be fully self sufficient, an adult responsible for enabling whatever life they sought.

I had zero expectations if getting a dime from my parents.

It is my belief that this is a sign if having successfully raised your kids (ie, they are no longer dependent upon you).

But you can raise successful kids who can fully function on their own, and still gift them $$ to ensure they have an even better life. Why wouldn't you want that for your grandkids and their kids? If you we worth $20M+ when your kids are 18-20, can you honestly tell me you wouldn't pay for their college education and gift them money in their 20s to ensure they max out Roth and 401K? that you wouldn't help them purchase a new car, so they can continue to save?
It does not mean they are not independent----they have a good job and can be fully independent. But why make them have roommates and live in a dump.

Yeah keep installing your kids on 3rd base and telling them they hit a triple. That won't give them a demented view of the world at all. They'll be wonderful little libertarian housecats.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The problem with leaving monies with charities is that many times the mission of the charity changes contrary to what the donor's intent was. I've seen this a lot.

As a family we have stopped donating to colleges in the US about 10 years ago.

Literally the same problem that donating money to children has.

Your children are your beloved children until they die. If they have a disability or mental illness or even addiction that makes it hard for them to appropriately manage money, leave the money to a trust and have conditions on it. You know your kids.

I would divorce someone who had this kind of lack of generosity to our children. Then he can do what he wants with his half of your money and you can do what you want with yours. And you don't have to take care of his stingy, elderly ass.

[Anonymous]

This thread is a great reminder of the 99% majority's moral obligation to eat the greedy rich. Get that bag when they grow old and senile but still trying to clutch those $millions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All very alien. It is human nature to support your children however you can.

DH and I each are leaving everything to our kids and nothing to each other (except primary residence). Will help avoid state, possibly federal estate taxes as well.

That's not how taxes work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why would someone earn all that money if not to leave it to kids? seriously

Because the husband also sees the value in leaving some to charity. Sad that you can't understand this motivation.

Question: who earned the money in the estate-to-be?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This thread is a great reminder of the 99% majority's moral obligation to eat the greedy rich. Get that bag when they grow old and senile but still trying to clutch those $millions.

I'm all about taxing the rich. But if my husband doesn't want our kids to have money just because? That's an a$$hole move.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All very alien. It is human nature to support your children however you can.

DH and I each are leaving everything to our kids and nothing to each other (except primary residence). Will help avoid state, possibly federal estate taxes as well.

That's not how taxes work.

Yeah, someone needs to wake up and see the bad idea.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A lot of charities don’t really do anything.

Exactly. Agree with PP who said if we were in $100M range, the answer might be different. We're in the $15M range and will be leaving it all to the kids 50/50. It's already in two trusts, one of which is irrevocable and can be accessed at 18 for a house, further education, etc. We've funded college 100%. Once grandkids arrive, we'll gift a portion to a trust for their benefit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This thread is a great reminder of the 99% majority's moral obligation to eat the greedy rich. Get that bag when they grow old and senile but still trying to clutch those $millions.

This is why we're securing the bag in trusts now - when I'm senile, the kids will already be funded.

[Anonymous]

2m is plenty.