Test results came back positive

[Anonymous]

TV can also live in mouth and on hands.

[Anonymous]

Just completely stop having sex with him.

[Anonymous]

Also immediately change your will and make sure you tell him he doesn't get your life insurance etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Also immediately change your will and make sure you tell him he doesn't get your life insurance etc.

Actually change your beneficiary which trumps a will.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would first consult with a divorce attorney and set everything up before dropping the bomb. Put yourself in the best position possible.

+1

And ensure you have a stable income yourself and a place to go if need be.

I’m so sorry. What a selfish coward your DH is. You deserve better.

[Anonymous]

Oh, yes, and change your beneficiary on your retirement accounts and life insurance policies to your child. You can do this via a living trust with a trusted adult (I hope you have one in your life) as trustee until your child is grown.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here- already talked with my doctor. Talking to another doctor later this week. Only real probability was a recent partner. I don't know why the type of std matters.

It matters because HPV can be in your system for years and then reactivate.

The first outbreak is always the most noticeable. If OP noticed enough symptoms to get tested, it is a primary infection. That’s how viruses work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I asked that question but the nurse (it wasn't a doc) said the chances of that are just really, really slim. I think that theory is pretty close to just false hope. But appreciate the optimism?

Is he bad about sharing towels at the gym or around family members etc?

Definitely get a second opinion about how it can spread. I'm reading it can spread through sex toys. In that case, could it spread via towels etc/

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here- already talked with my doctor. Talking to another doctor later this week. Only real probability was a recent partner. I don't know why the type of std matters.

It matters because HPV can be in your system for years and then reactivate.

Not really. Usually your body completely clears an hpv infection or you will continue to test positive for it. By “laying dormant,” it means the hpv infection isn’t causing any precancerous cells, not that it’s undetectable. If someone tests negative for hpv and then tests positive, it almost always means they have a new infection.

That is completely wrong.

No, it’s not. As long as the hpv is in your system, even if you have no symptoms of infection and no cellular changes, you will test positive for it. For most people, hpv clears itself COMPLETELY in about two years, but in some people it can last decades. If you tested negative and then test positive a few years later, you have a new infection. FACTS.

Wrong!

Men are not tested for HPV

https://www.cancer.org.au/cervicalscreening/i-am-over-25/what-does-my-test-result-mean/what-about-my-partner#

https://www.canada.ca/en/public-health/services/infectious-diseases/sexual-health-sexually-transmitted-infections/hpv-men-questions-answers.html#

Men cannot get tested for hpv, sure, but hpv almost always clears up faster in men, especially circumcised men, than in women, much faster actually. Persistent hpv infection is extremely rare in men. The only visible sign on HPV in men are warts and those always clear up after two years, usually much earlier., 5.9 months being the median. There is no way a woman could be with a man for ten years and then suddenly pick up warts from him.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4254924/#:~:text=Genital%20HPV%20infections%20may%20be,infections%20clearing%20within%2012%20months.

Yikes. This article says that HPV can be vertically transmitted from mother to child during birth and then it can cause aggressive HPV in the throat of the child. Who knew?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would first consult with a divorce attorney and set everything up before dropping the bomb. Put yourself in the best position possible.

This! Simultaneously address your health and secretly plan your way out. Don't drop the bomb ahead of time. I say this as someone whose XH went crazy after he got a new girlfriend so I'd be very careful and protect all your assets. I wish I'd done that first.

I'm so sorry OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Honestly raising a child in this area is so expensive and time consuming and the amount of men available that you'd want around you with a 5 year old are so small. Some woman was just killed meeting up with someone on OLD this week. I would just stay married and not sleep with him anymore. Raise your daughter and just have a platonic relationship. There doesn't seem to be a reason to divorce other than this idea that you could remarry and it's just not worth it with a kid that young. When they are driving age maybe.

Worst advice EVER

[Anonymous]

Take care of yourself. Don’t tell him. Get your affairs in order. See an attorney. Then plan without his knowledge. Don’t sleep with him again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I asked that question but the nurse (it wasn't a doc) said the chances of that are just really, really slim. I think that theory is pretty close to just false hope. But appreciate the optimism?

Is he bad about sharing towels at the gym or around family members etc?

Definitely get a second opinion about how it can spread. I'm reading it can spread through sex toys. In that case, could it spread via towels etc/

Yes, we should definitely go with the towel sharing hypothesis 🙄

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm embarrassed not to know this -- but I thought this doesn't always mean what we think it means?

for this reason, I'd put this in the health forum

It belongs here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Take care of yourself. Don’t tell him. Get your affairs in order. See an attorney. Then plan without his knowledge. Don’t sleep with him again.

Poor choice of words, pp.