Would you keep grinding or retire early?

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I roll my eyes when women claim they need to stay at home for their teenage kids. If you need to stay at home and not work for two teens, you are doing something wrong.

Keep looking for another job but be a little picky if you want. Try to consult and do part time.

Do NOT leave the workforce entirely.

What about college? Is that fully funded in 529s?

or leave the workforce and never look back. She doesn't need to work. Enjoy the freedom of never answering to anybody.

She could work and DH can stay home too. Why is it always woman who gets to stay home??

Because in my experiences, it's the women who actually have the desire to work part time/give up their job completely in return for adding in more "work for the family". Have not met many men who actually want to stop working in their 40s/early 50s, especially if the trade off was they had to instead spend 5-6 hours a day doing housework/cooking/cleaning/errands/driving the kids to activities/sitting attentively at the kids activities/etc. Who does it is up to the family themselves.
In our house, the wife became the SAHP when first was born. We were both happy with that decision---it was mine to make---I could stay home or send the kid to daycare/hire a nanny. I chose staying home with my kids, with full support of my spouse. While they Joke about it, they never would have actually wanted to quit their job and stay home---would have driven them crazy---they wouldn't have wanted to do all the work associated with staying home with the kids and would have missed interaction with adults and doing their job. While I made over 100K at age 28 when I quit, they still made much more and had the drive/determination to make even more, so it made sense for them to work and me to stay home.

Giving up $250k income so you can stay home and clean during the day? Hire a house manager for $80k, but do make time to pickup and go to those kids games.

And what will she keep exactly after paying taxes on her 250K if she even can keep making this much, and then dealing with an employee and their drama, their sick days, their vacations, their maternity leaves, etc.? Or will you screen and hire only post-menopausal women? Then you don't get free time, have to deal with deadlines and work drama to save a whooping 50K a year? If you hire a domestic employee you pay them with your after-tax money unlike corporations.

Pro tip: hire good people with good references, be a good person, pay people market or more, take care of them = no drama. We’ve had an amazing nanny for four years. We have three kids. There is no drama. People who have drama with employees don’t hire well or are cheap and look for drama.

A nanny for little kids is a necessity, childcare. A "nanny" for teenagers (who could be working as babysitters themselves) is a glorified driver and maybe a light housekeeper. Complete waste of money. 80K a year for this? "manager" to do what? Manage OP's "staff" and homes like she is living an episode of "Succession"?

She really just needs a driver (or better: figure out carpool) and a weekly house-cleaner. You can order all sorts of food anywhere and don't need to cook these days. OP obviously wants to "retire" to not have to juggle anything, have cushier life, and mainly actually spend time and getting involved with her kids, which "nanny" won't help with. Not because she is a CEO making big bucks and needs a household "manager"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Work is "grinding" when DW is working, work is just "work" when DH is working... Weird.

I think it reduces to who makes more money, right? In her case DH has a better career and higher compensation. And let's not fool ourselves pretending that husbands would do equally good job managing home, organization, cleaning, outsourcing, and kids. Kid stuff often has an element of social interaction with other parents, which means volunteering, being involved. I've been there and was super frustrated how very little SAHDs were expected to do compared to moms who were working full time.

[Anonymous]

They hear me grindin’ they hating…