If you made $1MM annually, would you send your kids to private?

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:No. And we make multiples of that. But public school is an important value to us.

Similar here. Our HHI will be > 5mm this year, and we send our kids to MoCo public schools. While we aren't leading the PTO, we are regular volunteers at the school (one spouse with part time work far more than the other). It's the right community for our family, and we wouldn't change it.

While we make a lot now, one of us grew up poor/lower middle class, the other middle-middle class. MoCo public schools suit us well. Yes, not everything is absolutely "perfect." In our view, that is sort of the point--we think our kids learn a bit more resilience when not everything is always perfect.

I will admit though that one high-earning spouse's income provides an advantage that helps make public schools work for us: The spouse who works part-time is *super* involved with kids' homework, enrichment, etc. We joke that our kids have 100% of MoCo public plus 50% home school on top.

We have a $2.5m HHI and also send our kids to public. DH and I both grew up in middle class families so we also valued sending our kids to public. Now that our kids are getting older, I’m wondering if we should switch our kids to private for a better educational experience.

I wonder if my poor background has clouded my judgment on what is best for our kids. I drive myself and DH crazy thinking about where to send our 3 kids.

I was similar but, we switched out kids this year. I’m telling you to switch. Break out of your upbringing and give your kids the leg up.

If PP’s kids are settled and happy in their public then there is no reason to switch

- Parent of K-12 lifers

+1000

Not sure it's really the leg up that the PP thinks it is. My kids got excellent educations at our local Public schools. One thru college and excelling at adulting. The other in college and thriving at a T30 school. Academically motivated and smart kid---private HS would not have done anything more than ensure they were at school with rich kids and kids who don't live in our neighborhood (ie they'd have to drive 30-45 mins to see friends, so isolated from their friends).

You don’t know what you don’t know.

I’ve never been to public school ..prek through college in privates.. but my wife was public her whole life.

The career trajectory of my friends is exponentially better than her friends. Sure there are outliers but like minds attract. People that drop 45k+ a year on 3rd grade will raise kids to be successful (financially or academically). I don’t know a single kid from my graduating private that isn’t doing something fairly impressive.

By 30, most have made the leap to VP, Sr. Manager, entrepreneur, director, attorney, dr, etc.

Born on home plate and staying there. So?

+1

Same people who likely think attending an "elite" college gives their kid a huge advantage as well. All while not realizing it's the home environment and the attitudes instilled by the family that provide this drive, connections, etc. Their kid will do well no matter where they attend K-12 or undergrad.

[Anonymous]

OP, I had considered private for our kids and we are "only" at $650K compared to your $1M. In my head, $1M was the minimum benchmark to consider sending three kids to private given the costs - and because it is such a luxury item.

That said, there are other factors. Our public schools are great. Our kids are happy. They have friends in the neighborhood and walk to their own activities/functions. They walk to school. These factors minimize the time and effort required from me to shuttle them to activities. DH and I work a ton of hours and it is hard to maintain our salaries and work life with the kids sports, school and activities.

All this is to say that private school is not only a financial commitment but a huge time commitment for those families that do not live nearby, which are most. Because of the demanding hours required of our jobs, I still do not know that private school would be a suitable lifestyle for us - or a way to maintain my current income level.

If that is an issue, it is also something to consider. And I'm not worried about college prospects. Our neighbor and dear friend had a number of elite college acceptances. It is doable from public, too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There are no “very good public school districts” in the DC metro area.

+1
....and post covid this can be extrapolated to the rest of the country too.

There are no good public schools. Period.

If I couldn't afford the best, I'd still do a good neighborhood catholic or try for financial aid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Assume mortgage is paid off and you have three kids. Annual income is appx. $1MM, and outlook with current jobs looks good, but you never know for sure when one spouse could lose a job. Assume you live in a very good public school district and kids are middle school age. Would you switch to private for high school assuming it has the potential to accelerate your kids’ growth to a new level? Costs for each kid would be $50k/annually, but you also have to save aggressively for college, grad school, and you want to make a plan to pay for educations of future grandkids too.

What do financial advisers usually say about investing in private school? For any of you who have sent your kids to private, do you regret it as a financial decision? Felt it was a bad investment?

PS - I’m asking for primarily financial advice here, not trying to trigger the public v private debate that would be more appropriate in the education forum.

The obvious financial advice at that income level is move to a state that doesn't soak 10% or more of your annual income.

Do that and school fees become a minor issue.

[Anonymous]

No brainer to send your kids to private schools even if you make less than 1m. I live in a wealthy neighborhood, most of the neighbors send their kids to public, that is idiotic. They think the public is "good", but truth is, there is no more "good" public schools in this area (DC metro, Arlington, McLean, Fairfax). Sure, there are products of public schools who end up successful, but the percentage of those successful students will be less and less in the years to come. With schools and curriculum being politicized (search "grading for equity", which BTW is already being implemented in Arlington and Fairfax!), public schools in 5-10 years will be unimaginably bad. Bottom line is, by the next generation, all public schools will be like Baltimore schools. Maybe you get away with sending your kids to public schools, but you will not be able to send your grandchildren to public schools. Although by them, standardized testing probably is eliminated so you won't know if your neighborhood public school is bad or not, because there will be no data showing only 10% of kids are reading at grade level. All you'll see is "wow, kids at our local public schools are doing project based learning, or AI research, or quantum physics...LOL, never mind that those kids can't even read or do basic math.

[Anonymous]

We make that and our kids go to Catholic school

[Anonymous]

No. I would save more and be financially independent earlier.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No. I would save more and be financially independent earlier.

All while being a bad parent if you categorically say no. The point isn’t public or private, the point is best for your kids, whatever that might be.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No. I would save more and be financially independent earlier.

All while being a bad parent if you categorically say no. The point isn’t public or private, the point is best for your kids, whatever that might be.

And for many kids, the publics are the best all around situation. If you live in a good district (which likely means you own an expensive home), why would you not send your kid to the public if they are thriving there? My kid has all the APs they need/want to take---except maybe we would have pushed to have them take Alg1 in 6th so they could hit MVC in 12th if it was offered. But in reality, my engineering student is doing just fine taking MVC and Diff EQ freshman year of college at a top school. That 1 year of more really advanced math is not going to make a difference.
What is different is that with public schools, their friends are nearby, not a 30-45 car ride away. So it's easier to socialize, attend football games, etc. They go to school with kids from the neighborhood. There was enough academic pressure at our HS, I don't think my kid needed anymore pressure/competition at a private school. My kid got into 3 schools ranked 30-50 and another 3 ranked 50-70. They are happy, well adjusted, have a 3.9 GPA after first year at a T30 school. Not sure what more they could want or need. Their love of learning is self motivating and does not have to be pushed. They will go far in life.

What I do have is that we saved $40-50K/year for 4-13 years that can be better spent on other things in life. Spending $200-500K for private schools would NOT have changed my kids trajectory much at all.

[Anonymous]

I’ve never heard a private school parent say it wasn’t worth it. It’s classic confirmation bias.

[Anonymous]

My HHI is 1.2 mil. We send our son to a public school.

We considered a few top notch private school in our area but didn’t feel like they are any better than his current public school( he is in 4 th grade).

But we may reconsider once he s going into high school. We ll see.

He is ranking in top 99 percentile in math and reading in Iowa testing. Once he s in 5 th grade he d be doing 6th grade math.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No brainer to send your kids to private schools even if you make less than 1m. I live in a wealthy neighborhood, most of the neighbors send their kids to public, that is idiotic. They think the public is "good", but truth is, there is no more "good" public schools in this area (DC metro, Arlington, McLean, Fairfax). Sure, there are products of public schools who end up successful, but the percentage of those successful students will be less and less in the years to come. With schools and curriculum being politicized (search "grading for equity", which BTW is already being implemented in Arlington and Fairfax!), public schools in 5-10 years will be unimaginably bad. Bottom line is, by the next generation, all public schools will be like Baltimore schools. Maybe you get away with sending your kids to public schools, but you will not be able to send your grandchildren to public schools. Although by them, standardized testing probably is eliminated so you won't know if your neighborhood public school is bad or not, because there will be no data showing only 10% of kids are reading at grade level. All you'll see is "wow, kids at our local public schools are doing project based learning, or AI research, or quantum physics...LOL, never mind that those kids can't even read or do basic math.

+1. Oh yeah, don’t forget the retakes, getting to makeup and redo assignments, homework and attendance not counting toward the final grade since that’s inequitable. The intention to reduce stress and increase equity is noble, but I don’t know if it’s actually achievable (is it achievable in any part of our capitalist society?) and I worry about what we are teaching our children. It’s actually not ok not to show up to class, it’s actually not ok to not do a bunch of assignments that are designed to help you prepare and prioritize and learn information, and it’s not realistic to expect that you’ll be able to have a bunch of retakes in college or at you job. Your first effort should be your best effort.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No brainer to send your kids to private schools even if you make less than 1m. I live in a wealthy neighborhood, most of the neighbors send their kids to public, that is idiotic. They think the public is "good", but truth is, there is no more "good" public schools in this area (DC metro, Arlington, McLean, Fairfax). Sure, there are products of public schools who end up successful, but the percentage of those successful students will be less and less in the years to come. With schools and curriculum being politicized (search "grading for equity", which BTW is already being implemented in Arlington and Fairfax!), public schools in 5-10 years will be unimaginably bad. Bottom line is, by the next generation, all public schools will be like Baltimore schools. Maybe you get away with sending your kids to public schools, but you will not be able to send your grandchildren to public schools. Although by them, standardized testing probably is eliminated so you won't know if your neighborhood public school is bad or not, because there will be no data showing only 10% of kids are reading at grade level. All you'll see is "wow, kids at our local public schools are doing project based learning, or AI research, or quantum physics...LOL, never mind that those kids can't even read or do basic math.

If PP above is indicative of the current education level in private schools, I'd opt to save my money. Out of curiosity, PP, do you live locally? And if so, what private school do your children attend? Is it a religious institution?

[Anonymous]

We make about half that and live in a "bad" school district (greatschools ratings 2-3, for whatever those are worth). My kids are thriving in the public schools. I would absolutely consider private if I thought that their needs weren't being met in public for whatever reason. But the larger district offers a lot of value IMHO - larger class selection, tracking options for differentiation, every elective and extracurricular/club you can think of, large pool of potential friendships. Sure there are a lot of students who struggle with academics - low income, ESL, learning disabilities, etc - but by the time kids are in MS/HS and can choose classes at their level (including honors/AP as appropriate), they have all the educational opportunity and support they could ask for.

If I feel that way on $0.5M and 'bad' schools, I can't imagine feeling much different with $1M and 'good' public schools.

[Anonymous]

We wanted our kids to be friends with kids from rich families. Being in a social circle with people from the upper class was important to us. We sent them to private school (Sidwell Friends).