Frustrated with lack of Special Needs schools in this area

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm reviving this thread to see if this person found a school for her DD. My DS is in middle school at ACPS and this year has been a disaster. He's not learning anything, is in classes that have a lot of disruptive behavior and now we've taken him out because we're concerned for his safety. ACPS is way understaffed. We hired a consultant who told us what we knew already - there are no good schools for our son. He falls between the cracks. He has ASD and ADHD, which interfere with his ability to learn. He's not 2e so no privates like Commonwealth or Lab School will take him.

The Newton School? My understanding is they run buses from the Arlington area.

Depending if primary dx is ADHD or ASD, Commonwealth might be worth a look. Newton only goes thru 8th and has a bus from N. Arlington, but could be a fit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I agree with you 100%. My child who is average IQ but has ASD with expressive language issues but really zero behavioral problems and is truly a sweet, kind child who wants to do well is going to a very small private school right now but will eventually have to go to public school because most small privates for middle and high school won't accept any child with an ASD diagnosis.

So just don’t disclose the diagnosis? What would you gain by disclosing if your child doesn’t have any behavioral challenges?

My child was diagnosed with ASD (Asperger’s) as a preschooler. Later, ADHD was added. Now, as a teenager, the ADHD diagnosis fits but the ASD is less apparent. We’ve kept an IEP in public school but he’s in Gen Ed classes with little to no SpEd support.





If your child doesn’t need a lot of support, why does the school need to know?

They always ask for school records, not sure how you can keep that a secret......

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
My dear OP.

There are a LOT of private SN schools in this area compared to the rest of the world.

Because in the rest of the world (apart from a few other wealthy pockets of the US), THERE ARE PRACTICALLY NO SN SCHOOLS OR SERVICES, private or public.

Europe and wealthy Asian countries are very behind when it comes to educating children who are different. I am from western Europe and even today, autistic children cannot find schools in my country! This has been the subject of recent debate on my national news, actually. There are single parents with autistic children who cannot go to work because their children cannot go to school, and they rely on government aid to survive. The government has promised reforms.

The USA is BY FAR - by so very far it's just not even funny - the most advanced and tolerant country when it comes to supporting special needs and disabilities. I think it comes from its highly individualist concept of self. Asian countries have a more communal concept of self and fitting into the group is highly desirable - which also means that being different is bad, and there is an enormous amount of stigma and lack of support surrounding disabilities. European countries exist somewhere in the middle of those two extremes, but they're still not has open-minded about SN than the US, and have not invested in educating children with differences.

So in the depth of your frustration with lack of services, please remind yourself of this every now and then.

I’m not OP. What a condescending post. Written like someone who doesn’t have a special needs child. The poster lives here in AMERICA, so she doesn’t need to remind her self about what everyone else in the WORLD is doing. Take a seat poster. To OP, I have an ASD child, it can be really hard and I’m sorry that you are having trouble. What about Ivymount? https://www.ivymount.org/

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I agree with you 100%. My child who is average IQ but has ASD with expressive language issues but really zero behavioral problems and is truly a sweet, kind child who wants to do well is going to a very small private school right now but will eventually have to go to public school because most small privates for middle and high school won't accept any child with an ASD diagnosis.

So just don’t disclose the diagnosis? What would you gain by disclosing if your child doesn’t have any behavioral challenges?

My child was diagnosed with ASD (Asperger’s) as a preschooler. Later, ADHD was added. Now, as a teenager, the ADHD diagnosis fits but the ASD is less apparent. We’ve kept an IEP in public school but he’s in Gen Ed classes with little to no SpEd support.


If your child doesn’t need a lot of support, why does the school need to know?

They always ask for school records, not sure how you can keep that a secret......

Private School isn’t going through reams of documents. Transcript and teacher recommendations are what they are looking at. Just don’t disclose diagnosis and unless it comes up in the teacher’s recommendation (they do ask about social skills and strengths and weaknesses) you are fine. Most privates require interviews, so your child’s diagnosis may be apparent. But do not let a diagnosis hold you back from applying!!! I know a number of ASD kids at privates.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
My dear OP.

There are a LOT of private SN schools in this area compared to the rest of the world.

Because in the rest of the world (apart from a few other wealthy pockets of the US), THERE ARE PRACTICALLY NO SN SCHOOLS OR SERVICES, private or public.

Europe and wealthy Asian countries are very behind when it comes to educating children who are different. I am from western Europe and even today, autistic children cannot find schools in my country! This has been the subject of recent debate on my national news, actually. There are single parents with autistic children who cannot go to work because their children cannot go to school, and they rely on government aid to survive. The government has promised reforms.

The USA is BY FAR - by so very far it's just not even funny - the most advanced and tolerant country when it comes to supporting special needs and disabilities. I think it comes from its highly individualist concept of self. Asian countries have a more communal concept of self and fitting into the group is highly desirable - which also means that being different is bad, and there is an enormous amount of stigma and lack of support surrounding disabilities. European countries exist somewhere in the middle of those two extremes, but they're still not has open-minded about SN than the US, and have not invested in educating children with differences.

So in the depth of your frustration with lack of services, please remind yourself of this every now and then.

I’m not OP. What a condescending post. Written like someone who doesn’t have a special needs child. The poster lives here in AMERICA, so she doesn’t need to remind her self about what everyone else in the WORLD is doing. Take a seat poster. To OP, I have an ASD child, it can be really hard and I’m sorry that you are having trouble. What about Ivymount? https://www.ivymount.org/

Thank you! I’m the OP and Ivy Mount does look promising. I’ve emailed them.
Thanks for responding to this PP. The PP’s post brought me to tears. We have moved back to the US and turned down fabulous work opportunities to stay here but the PP is also just wrong. I’d kill for the specialized schools and state funded therapy they have in many countries but I don’t see what that has to do with my school search. My DH is from Western Europe so we are quite familiar with the systems in several countries. Arrggh. I still argue there is a serious lack of SN schools in this area.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:We actually need more schools for children with behavioral issues and more intensive special needs, but who will receive a diploma. There is an abundance of options if your child is gifted or on grade level. And for behavior, I’m talking issues like being disruptive not aggressive. There is only one private option I am aware of and it’s not great. No options really for kids with low average iqs, learning issues, and behaviors and many, many, many kids in that boat.

there is not an abundance of options if your child is gifted. Please share their names if I am wrong.

For a grade-level or advanced kid with autism and no behavioral issues? Maybe not an "abundance" of options, but MANY more options than kids with behavioral issues. Almost all of the SN privates discussed on here (Siena, Diener, Auburn, McClean, Lab, Commonwealth) will not take a kid with behavioral issues. And summer camps? Forget about it. For understandable reasons, they treat behavioral issues as the third rail.

None of those listed had the higher levels of math and science that my local HS had for my gifted child. Commonwealth was close, but even then it would be a supervised online college class (which is what my friend’s child ended up doing).

Oh yes, I am PP, and I agree that publics are better for an advanced kid with autism. Kids like that need to be mainstreamed. We're currently considering moving to MoCo for that reason.

MoCo has very little in terms of gifted for kids. I wouldn't move here for that. Look at the number of available slots and its very few given the need in MoCo.

Mainstreaming a kid with autism into advanced classes is what I’m talking about. “Gifted” education is going away everywhere. The main point is that the place for a bright child with autism is public school with a strong IEP. OP seems to have formed an opinion about publics (and “those” kids she doesn’t want her child to be around.) Her loss.

The OP said she was on ACPS which I think is very poor for 2E students.

Unless her child is gifted-gifted (unlikely, statistically) what 2E elementary students need is basically just really good mainstreaming. My impression is that elementary school is where you are more likely to accomplish this. Harder in middle and high school.

Definitely not. With many special needs there is a lot of anxiety involved. From our personal experience that isn't handled well in public.

OP here - yes, tons of anxiety involved. It’s becoming clear ACPS is an even bigger mess than I was afraid of. The anxiety will literally make my DD mute for the entire day, so there is no way a main stream private will work. Her drs think she benefits the most from being around children who are speaking at an age appropriate level so are against any type of homeschool situation. Out of the schools recommended here, most won’t take anyone w/ an ASD diagnosis (dd’s expressive language is too far behind to not disclose) or don’t start until later than early elementary. Siena fits the need on paper but the recent reviews from both campuses are universally horrific. I feel like we are back at square one.

My Kindergartner had a very good experience in an ACPS elementary school this year. I do worry about middle school, but we have 5 years for that, and I am very pleased with IEP team and services. I would wish there was more communication, but I truly love our school. I have a few friends at different elementary schools across the district and 95% are positive.

I'm reviving this thread to see if this person found a school for her DD. My DS is in middle school at ACPS and this year has been a disaster. He's not learning anything, is in classes that have a lot of disruptive behavior and now we've taken him out because we're concerned for his safety. ACPS is way understaffed. We hired a consultant who told us what we knew already - there are no good schools for our son. He falls between the cracks. He has ASD and ADHD, which interfere with his ability to learn. He's not 2e so no privates like Commonwealth or Lab School will take him.

We are loving the Harbour School in Annapolis for our kid w/ ADHD and ASD and also not 2E. We have met many families who literally moved to the Annapolis area to send their kids there.

OP here - we are desperate enough that I’d consider commuting. Does anyone drive from NOVA or DC? Unfortunately we can’t relocate

There are definitely DC kids - I'm not sure about NoVa, since we're so new I have only met a few families. But you should tour - it's really, really great.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm reviving this thread to see if this person found a school for her DD. My DS is in middle school at ACPS and this year has been a disaster. He's not learning anything, is in classes that have a lot of disruptive behavior and now we've taken him out because we're concerned for his safety. ACPS is way understaffed. We hired a consultant who told us what we knew already - there are no good schools for our son. He falls between the cracks. He has ASD and ADHD, which interfere with his ability to learn. He's not 2e so no privates like Commonwealth or Lab School will take him.

The Newton School? My understanding is they run buses from the Arlington area.

Depending if primary dx is ADHD or ASD, Commonwealth might be worth a look. Newton only goes thru 8th and has a bus from N. Arlington, but could be a fit.

Sycamore School?

[Anonymous]

We have a gifted kid at lab. There are many others…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The intersection between people who need a SN high school and people who can afford 50k a year may not be enough to justify additional schools.

I think OP's other issue is that the kid isn't behind academically, which can make some of the local schools a bad fit. Objectively, though, we've got a ton of special education schools in the area compared to most places. I grew up somewhere where the nearest private school with any kind of autism program was hours away, meanwhile we've got Kennedy Krieger, Ivymount, Katherine Thomas, Foundations, and Phillips all of which serve students with autism. It's not perfect, but it's hard to call that a lack.

These schools you've listed are not really a choice for most people. Ivy Mount is $72K per year. How many families of autistic children can really afford it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I agree with you 100%. My child who is average IQ but has ASD with expressive language issues but really zero behavioral problems and is truly a sweet, kind child who wants to do well is going to a very small private school right now but will eventually have to go to public school because most small privates for middle and high school won't accept any child with an ASD diagnosis.

So just don’t disclose the diagnosis? What would you gain by disclosing if your child doesn’t have any behavioral challenges?

My child was diagnosed with ASD (Asperger’s) as a preschooler. Later, ADHD was added. Now, as a teenager, the ADHD diagnosis fits but the ASD is less apparent. We’ve kept an IEP in public school but he’s in Gen Ed classes with little to no SpEd support.


If your child doesn’t need a lot of support, why does the school need to know?

They always ask for school records, not sure how you can keep that a secret......

Private School isn’t going through reams of documents. Transcript and teacher recommendations are what they are looking at. Just don’t disclose diagnosis and unless it comes up in the teacher’s recommendation (they do ask about social skills and strengths and weaknesses) you are fine. Most privates require interviews, so your child’s diagnosis may be apparent. But do not let a diagnosis hold you back from applying!!! I know a number of ASD kids at privates.

You are wrong. The AO at SN schools seek out everything. They don't want behavioral problems. If they AREN'T looking at all of these reports and testing you should be worried.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The intersection between people who need a SN high school and people who can afford 50k a year may not be enough to justify additional schools.

I think OP's other issue is that the kid isn't behind academically, which can make some of the local schools a bad fit. Objectively, though, we've got a ton of special education schools in the area compared to most places. I grew up somewhere where the nearest private school with any kind of autism program was hours away, meanwhile we've got Kennedy Krieger, Ivymount, Katherine Thomas, Foundations, and Phillips all of which serve students with autism. It's not perfect, but it's hard to call that a lack.

These schools you've listed are not really a choice for most people. Ivy Mount is $72K per year. How many families of autistic children can really afford it?

I can't speak to that but the McLean School (where DD went) and Commonwealth academy are currently $43K a year. The latter was worth every penny. McLean School? Not so in our humble experience.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We actually need more schools for children with behavioral issues and more intensive special needs, but who will receive a diploma. There is an abundance of options if your child is gifted or on grade level. And for behavior, I’m talking issues like being disruptive not aggressive. There is only one private option I am aware of and it’s not great. No options really for kids with low average iqs, learning issues, and behaviors and many, many, many kids in that boat.

there is not an abundance of options if your child is gifted. Please share their names if I am wrong.

For a grade-level or advanced kid with autism and no behavioral issues? Maybe not an "abundance" of options, but MANY more options than kids with behavioral issues. Almost all of the SN privates discussed on here (Siena, Diener, Auburn, McClean, Lab, Commonwealth) will not take a kid with behavioral issues. And summer camps? Forget about it. For understandable reasons, they treat behavioral issues as the third rail.

None of those listed had the higher levels of math and science that my local HS had for my gifted child. Commonwealth was close, but even then it would be a supervised online college class (which is what my friend’s child ended up doing).

Oh yes, I am PP, and I agree that publics are better for an advanced kid with autism. Kids like that need to be mainstreamed. We're currently considering moving to MoCo for that reason.

MoCo has very little in terms of gifted for kids. I wouldn't move here for that. Look at the number of available slots and its very few given the need in MoCo.

Mainstreaming a kid with autism into advanced classes is what I’m talking about. “Gifted” education is going away everywhere. The main point is that the place for a bright child with autism is public school with a strong IEP. OP seems to have formed an opinion about publics (and “those” kids she doesn’t want her child to be around.) Her loss.

The OP said she was on ACPS which I think is very poor for 2E students.

Unless her child is gifted-gifted (unlikely, statistically) what 2E elementary students need is basically just really good mainstreaming. My impression is that elementary school is where you are more likely to accomplish this. Harder in middle and high school.

Definitely not. With many special needs there is a lot of anxiety involved. From our personal experience that isn't handled well in public.

OP here - yes, tons of anxiety involved. It’s becoming clear ACPS is an even bigger mess than I was afraid of. The anxiety will literally make my DD mute for the entire day, so there is no way a main stream private will work. Her drs think she benefits the most from being around children who are speaking at an age appropriate level so are against any type of homeschool situation. Out of the schools recommended here, most won’t take anyone w/ an ASD diagnosis (dd’s expressive language is too far behind to not disclose) or don’t start until later than early elementary. Siena fits the need on paper but the recent reviews from both campuses are universally horrific. I feel like we are back at square one.

My Kindergartner had a very good experience in an ACPS elementary school this year. I do worry about middle school, but we have 5 years for that, and I am very pleased with IEP team and services. I would wish there was more communication, but I truly love our school. I have a few friends at different elementary schools across the district and 95% are positive.

I'm reviving this thread to see if this person found a school for her DD. My DS is in middle school at ACPS and this year has been a disaster. He's not learning anything, is in classes that have a lot of disruptive behavior and now we've taken him out because we're concerned for his safety. ACPS is way understaffed. We hired a consultant who told us what we knew already - there are no good schools for our son. He falls between the cracks. He has ASD and ADHD, which interfere with his ability to learn. He's not 2e so no privates like Commonwealth or Lab School will take him.

We are loving the Harbour School in Annapolis for our kid w/ ADHD and ASD and also not 2E. We have met many families who literally moved to the Annapolis area to send their kids there.

OP here - we are desperate enough that I’d consider commuting. Does anyone drive from NOVA or DC? Unfortunately we can’t relocate

I actually live not far from there.
Two thoughts: 1. There are several DCPS schools dropping kids off there every day, so it may be worth to see if you can get a private placement. 2. Lots of people live in Annapolis and commute to DC. But to NOVA... sigh... that would be pushing an hour and a half each way in rush hour, depending on exactly where you're going.

[Anonymous]

This is totally off-the-wall, but I wonder if some place like Fairhaven School might work. At least it might be a real help with the anxiety. You'd need to provide therapies outside of school, but it could get you the social and linguistic environment you want.

https://www.fairhavenschool.com/

[Anonymous]

I see to live in Bowie and had neighbors that went to harbor in Annapolis. If you live near 50 (either Bowie or Davidsonville), Annapolis is a quick 15 minutes away and you can be in dowtown DC in 30-45 minutes. If you commute out to Annapolis for the school, you will be going against rush hour so 45 minutes is probably realistic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The intersection between people who need a SN high school and people who can afford 50k a year may not be enough to justify additional schools.

I think OP's other issue is that the kid isn't behind academically, which can make some of the local schools a bad fit. Objectively, though, we've got a ton of special education schools in the area compared to most places. I grew up somewhere where the nearest private school with any kind of autism program was hours away, meanwhile we've got Kennedy Krieger, Ivymount, Katherine Thomas, Foundations, and Phillips all of which serve students with autism. It's not perfect, but it's hard to call that a lack.

These schools you've listed are not really a choice for most people. Ivy Mount is $72K per year. How many families of autistic children can really afford it?

The vast majority of families receive public funding and it really doesn't sound like OP's child has a strong case for public funding. Unfortunately, children at grade level have a harder time getting non-public placements.