MIL ate my birthday chocolates

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That's rude of her but you are overreacting. Surely she left some for you, right? And wouldn't you have offered to share since they were at your house anyway?

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That's rude of her but you are overreacting. Surely she left some for you, right? And wouldn't you have offered to share since they were at your house anyway?

+1

There’s no such thing as “leaving some” of someone’s birthday present for them unless it was specifically offered to you. Clearly you two were raided in a barn. You really think it’s OK to open someone’s mail and help yourself to their gifts?!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can't imagine my MIL opening my packages. What if it was a kinky sex toy?!

You got this big vibrator today in the mail. I tested it out for you and it seems to work well. XO-MIL

Lol. This was definitely hilarious

For the record OP you are a saint for putting up with your MILs petty garbage while being so thoughtful. I hope your DH does the explaining as to the fact that HE doesn’t feel comfortable having them stay in the future.

Thing is, as long as I made arrangements for a sitter—my parents, my aunt/uncle, my cousin, one of our friends, my brother—it would never occur to him that his family needed “a turn.” I have gone out of my way to be “fair” about this sort of thing, and to make sure that our kids spend fairly equal time with both of our families. That stops now. From now on, if we go away for a night or a few nights, it’s going to be someone I can fully trust watching my kids. DH’s parents can visit when we are home, and we will still occasionally go on vacation with him. But I don’t even need to declare to DH or to MIL/FIL no more unsupervised visits. They will simply never be in our home alone again.

Sigh. You sound like a 2-year-old having a tantrum. You've done everything except stomp your feet. Have you ever considered that you have to control your emotions and your behaviors? I haven't read all of your posts but I did read the OP and a couple others. You need to get ahold of yourself. You cannot be setting up a good model for your children to follow if you're constantly having these strong outbursts. Remember that what you do is what they will do. Try to reign in your strong emotions and act more maturely.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That's rude of her but you are overreacting. Surely she left some for you, right? And wouldn't you have offered to share since they were at your house anyway?

+1

There’s no such thing as “leaving some” of someone’s birthday present for them unless it was specifically offered to you. Clearly you two were raided in a barn. You really think it’s OK to open someone’s mail and help yourself to their gifts?!

Both posters say it was rude. Both posters say that the OP is overreacting. I agree.

IMO the OP isn't working on an even keel. Maybe she is undiagnosed manic or bi-polar or something but the screaming about a box of chocolates is a little over the top and indicates a deeper problem than what she is presenting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can't imagine my MIL opening my packages. What if it was a kinky sex toy?!

You got this big vibrator today in the mail. I tested it out for you and it seems to work well. XO-MIL

Lol. This was definitely hilarious

For the record OP you are a saint for putting up with your MILs petty garbage while being so thoughtful. I hope your DH does the explaining as to the fact that HE doesn’t feel comfortable having them stay in the future.

Thing is, as long as I made arrangements for a sitter—my parents, my aunt/uncle, my cousin, one of our friends, my brother—it would never occur to him that his family needed “a turn.” I have gone out of my way to be “fair” about this sort of thing, and to make sure that our kids spend fairly equal time with both of our families. That stops now. From now on, if we go away for a night or a few nights, it’s going to be someone I can fully trust watching my kids. DH’s parents can visit when we are home, and we will still occasionally go on vacation with him. But I don’t even need to declare to DH or to MIL/FIL no more unsupervised visits. They will simply never be in our home alone again.

Sigh. You sound like a 2-year-old having a tantrum. You've done everything except stomp your feet. Have you ever considered that you have to control your emotions and your behaviors? I haven't read all of your posts but I did read the OP and a couple others. You need to get ahold of yourself. You cannot be setting up a good model for your children to follow if you're constantly having these strong outbursts. Remember that what you do is what they will do. Try to reign in your strong emotions and act more maturely.

Uh oh found the boundary-crossing MIL!

It’s “rein in,” by the way. A monarch reigns. A rider reins in a horse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That's rude of her but you are overreacting. Surely she left some for you, right? And wouldn't you have offered to share since they were at your house anyway?

+1

umm no. I’m from England and on the rare occasions I get good English chocolate I’m not sharing it. I’ll give you the clothes off my back before I’d give you a bar of my imported chocolate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can't imagine my MIL opening my packages. What if it was a kinky sex toy?!

You got this big vibrator today in the mail. I tested it out for you and it seems to work well. XO-MIL

Lol. This was definitely hilarious

For the record OP you are a saint for putting up with your MILs petty garbage while being so thoughtful. I hope your DH does the explaining as to the fact that HE doesn’t feel comfortable having them stay in the future.

Thing is, as long as I made arrangements for a sitter—my parents, my aunt/uncle, my cousin, one of our friends, my brother—it would never occur to him that his family needed “a turn.” I have gone out of my way to be “fair” about this sort of thing, and to make sure that our kids spend fairly equal time with both of our families. That stops now. From now on, if we go away for a night or a few nights, it’s going to be someone I can fully trust watching my kids. DH’s parents can visit when we are home, and we will still occasionally go on vacation with him. But I don’t even need to declare to DH or to MIL/FIL no more unsupervised visits. They will simply never be in our home alone again.

Sigh. You sound like a 2-year-old having a tantrum. You've done everything except stomp your feet. Have you ever considered that you have to control your emotions and your behaviors? I haven't read all of your posts but I did read the OP and a couple others. You need to get ahold of yourself. You cannot be setting up a good model for your children to follow if you're constantly having these strong outbursts. Remember that what you do is what they will do. Try to reign in your strong emotions and act more maturely.

I couldn’t disagree with you more.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That's rude of her but you are overreacting. Surely she left some for you, right? And wouldn't you have offered to share since they were at your house anyway?

+1

There’s no such thing as “leaving some” of someone’s birthday present for them unless it was specifically offered to you. Clearly you two were raided in a barn. You really think it’s OK to open someone’s mail and help yourself to their gifts?!

Both posters say it was rude. Both posters say that the OP is overreacting. I agree.

IMO the OP isn't working on an even keel. Maybe she is undiagnosed manic or bi-polar or something but the screaming about a box of chocolates is a little over the top and indicates a deeper problem than what she is presenting.

“Screaming?” Show me the screaming. OP isn’t so much as bringing this up to MIL. Show me where she screamed. Are you mentally stable? Because you are acting like your fantasy of her screaming is reality. It is not. Seek help if you frequently suffer delusions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Now you know what to get her for Christmas

now this is very smart! One less thing to worry about.

OP I think her entitlement attitude is based on the misguided notion that she can boundary cross as payment for her childcare (for "doing you the favor" of childcare)

I'd look into getting a sitter. However; if she's a great grandma and the kids love her, then you'll have to come up with boundaries and convey them to her.

[Anonymous]

I'm British too OP and I find this really shocking. I wonder if it is an underlying cultural and class difference - you say she was gloating, so she knew she'd been "naughty".

Do you just smile and carry on with this kind of thing or do you actually say something - because I think that makes all the difference. It sounds like she did it in part to wind you up.

I would have said - take the box, you've ruined it now you might as well finish it and I'll get another for myself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That's rude of her but you are overreacting. Surely she left some for you, right? And wouldn't you have offered to share since they were at your house anyway?

+1

umm no. I’m from England and on the rare occasions I get good English chocolate I’m not sharing it. I’ll give you the clothes off my back before I’d give you a bar of my imported chocolate.

I'm French and feel the same way. But I do bring back boxes for friends. Not boundary-crossing people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
OP,

My mother is terribly lacking in boundaries. Her specialty is declining invitations for us. She once declined on our behalf when my aunt called her (we were visiting my mother but happened to be out at the time) to invite us to stay over for Christmas. I found out a few days later and was livid, and had to call my aunt back and say that yes of course we'd love to come. She's also obsessed with our weight and tries to physically grab us, the kids and I, and push us on the scale.

So I get the immense irritation you're feeling, because it's not "just" chocolates. Your MIL is not someone you can trust.

But happy birthday anyway

Woah! Every time I think I have heard the worst mother story, new ones keep on coming.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm British too OP and I find this really shocking. I wonder if it is an underlying cultural and class difference - you say she was gloating, so she knew she'd been "naughty".

Do you just smile and carry on with this kind of thing or do you actually say something - because I think that makes all the difference. It sounds like she did it in part to wind you up.

I would have said - take the box, you've ruined it now you might as well finish it and I'll get another for myself.

When did OP day she was British? I think the British poster is just poring on agreement.

[Anonymous]

Next time order edibles and make sure they are strong!! LOL

[Anonymous]

Christopher Elbow from Kansas City?? Those are good...