are we still morally obligated to pay for daycare?

[Anonymous]

We’ve been paying our provider (not in DMV anymore). It’s run by the YMCA so daycare isn’t the only revenue source. They have now partially reopened (50%) and we’re on a waitlist for return with no date in the foreseeable future. Before it hurt to pay but felt like the right thing. Now it’s harder to pay the full amount when I know they have some income from families. We also expect that my husband’s job will end within the next few months and, if that leads to us moving (or even him working not near the daycare) we may withdraw before they reopen. Anyway, would you pay full tuition? Save the money? Redirect it to other causes. For what it’s worth, the months we paid the daycare wasn’t set up for accepting payments so we gave the money instead to the YMCA’s covid 19 fund. I don’t know if this would be the same now or not.

[Anonymous]

I would not keep paying if they are partially reopened and you are on the waitlist and don't have a slot.

[Anonymous]

Absolutely not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Absolutely not.

+1

[Anonymous]

No, and it's a little absurd they've kept asking. Everyone is struggling.

[Anonymous]

You were never obligated to pay, particularly since they've opened, with a job loss looming and no date for return.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No, and it's a little absurd they've kept asking. Everyone is struggling.

They didn't ask! They weren't even set up to receive payments!

[Anonymous]

I would pay a retainer to keep a spot but certainly not full price.

[Anonymous]

They’re not charging you and you’re on the waitlist. Pay whatever deposit puts you on the waitlist and stop paying tuition.

[Anonymous]

I get exactly what the OP is saying and feeling, but absolutely do not think that they should feel obligated to pay.

We had/have a in-home/family provider. It's her only source of income, so I have felt obligated to pay her. But I'd feel differently it was a larger business. They simply have more options- legally and financially- than a small in-home provider.

It's also different if it's a forced or voluntary shutdown. I'd say any goodwill I'd feel towards a provider would rapidly disappear if they were able to reopen, but chose not to. Space-contrained openings is an interesting middle case, but I'd at least say that I shouldn't be forced to subsidize the child care costs for other families while I'm being forced to keep my kids at home.

[Anonymous]

I don't think there's any moral obligation question here. They can set conditions and you can stay or go, based on what makes sense for your family. If you don't anticipate needing to return, then withdraw.

[Anonymous]

Morality is individual, not crowdsourced. Do what you believe to be right according to your personal values and your financial situation. Other people's opinion and six bucks get you a grande caramel macchiato at Starbucks.

[Anonymous]

Op here. Here’s the situation :
March - daycare shutdown about when we planned to pull 3 year old anyway. We told the staff we were pulling her but we’d make our end of month payment. Daycare shutdown over the weekend and there were no more required payments. We made full March and April payments to the “Covid relief fund” the Y set up. The director of the daycare specifically called us and said they were trying to solicit donations to the fund. The fund’s goal was $2 million and eventually raised roughly $3 million. The y was providing meals, job hunt support, checking in on seniors, and running a small space for children of essential workers. I don’t know how much of our donations (over $3k) went to things like teachers. I didn’t pay in May and then was thinking about paying in June but it’s a lot and now some families are paying and receiving childcare while there’s no indication we will be allowed back anytime soon. (The center is operating on 50% capacity.) There are no fees to be on the waitlist and no payment was required since Feb. At first my thought was “of course we pay the teachers” but I also feel we’ve donated a fair bit already.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here. Here’s the situation :
March - daycare shutdown about when we planned to pull 3 year old anyway. We told the staff we were pulling her but we’d make our end of month payment. Daycare shutdown over the weekend and there were no more required payments. We made full March and April payments to the “Covid relief fund” the Y set up. The director of the daycare specifically called us and said they were trying to solicit donations to the fund. The fund’s goal was $2 million and eventually raised roughly $3 million. The y was providing meals, job hunt support, checking in on seniors, and running a small space for children of essential workers. I don’t know how much of our donations (over $3k) went to things like teachers. I didn’t pay in May and then was thinking about paying in June but it’s a lot and now some families are paying and receiving childcare while there’s no indication we will be allowed back anytime soon. (The center is operating on 50% capacity.) There are no fees to be on the waitlist and no payment was required since Feb. At first my thought was “of course we pay the teachers” but I also feel we’ve donated a fair bit already.

Wow... The Y's actions seem wildly inappropriate. You're not being asked to make daycare payments. You're being asked to donate to a charity that just happens to be at the same entity that operates the daycare.

It would be fine for YMCA to solicit donations. But, having the director of the daycare distorts the situation, and may even suggest some sort of (unstated) quid-pro-quo between donations and daycare.

You shouldn't feel obligated to donate. And YMCA shouldn't be having the director solicit donations.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. Here’s the situation :
March - daycare shutdown about when we planned to pull 3 year old anyway. We told the staff we were pulling her but we’d make our end of month payment. Daycare shutdown over the weekend and there were no more required payments. We made full March and April payments to the “Covid relief fund” the Y set up. The director of the daycare specifically called us and said they were trying to solicit donations to the fund. The fund’s goal was $2 million and eventually raised roughly $3 million. The y was providing meals, job hunt support, checking in on seniors, and running a small space for children of essential workers. I don’t know how much of our donations (over $3k) went to things like teachers. I didn’t pay in May and then was thinking about paying in June but it’s a lot and now some families are paying and receiving childcare while there’s no indication we will be allowed back anytime soon. (The center is operating on 50% capacity.) There are no fees to be on the waitlist and no payment was required since Feb. At first my thought was “of course we pay the teachers” but I also feel we’ve donated a fair bit already.

Wow... The Y's actions seem wildly inappropriate. You're not being asked to make daycare payments. You're being asked to donate to a charity that just happens to be at the same entity that operates the daycare.

It would be fine for YMCA to solicit donations. But, having the director of the daycare distorts the situation, and may even suggest some sort of (unstated) quid-pro-quo between donations and daycare.

You shouldn't feel obligated to donate. And YMCA shouldn't be having the director solicit donations.

+1

Families pay daycare fees in exchange for a service. They may also show their appreciation in other ways as well (such as teacher gifts, donations during a crisis). But to ask families to be the daycare's/organization's safety net when they can no longer provide the service is wrong.