Fresh Transfer Failed; First FET - Insights Appreciated

[Anonymous]

I started with SGF at 35 with no known fertility issues just a lesbian couple trying to get pregnant. We did 10 IUI cycles with one chemical pregnancy no success otherwise. I switched doctors and we did an egg retrieval earlier this year (at age 36) that resulted in 4 viable non-tested embryos - my doctor recommended against PGS testing at the time of retrieval. My first transfer of a grade AA embryo failed with no real explanation. I bled through nearly half of the two week wait and so the doctor said that the endometrin inserts could have caused some kind of negative side effects and really irritated my cervix. I've done significant additional testing, all coming back normal, and now I am mid-cycle for an FET. The remaining embryos are XBBB.

Anyway, I have done a pretty darn good job of staying optimistic but this time I can't seem to get out from under the weight of all the failed cycles. I am having a really hard time getting excited for my first round of PIO shots with basically no new information other than "everything looks good". Still waiting on endometrial biopsy results.

I guess I am just looking for positive stories, words of encouragement, similar stories, or happy endings with a long road. Also, if you have anything that worked for you to help an FET to stick. Both doctors have been really positive and my test results don't show anything wrong. I guess I am just struggling at this point.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I started with SGF at 35 with no known fertility issues just a lesbian couple trying to get pregnant. We did 10 IUI cycles with one chemical pregnancy no success otherwise. I switched doctors and we did an egg retrieval earlier this year (at age 36) that resulted in 4 viable non-tested embryos - my doctor recommended against PGS testing at the time of retrieval. My first transfer of a grade AA embryo failed with no real explanation. I bled through nearly half of the two week wait and so the doctor said that the endometrin inserts could have caused some kind of negative side effects and really irritated my cervix. I've done significant additional testing, all coming back normal, and now I am mid-cycle for an FET. The remaining embryos are XBBB.

Anyway, I have done a pretty darn good job of staying optimistic but this time I can't seem to get out from under the weight of all the failed cycles. I am having a really hard time getting excited for my first round of PIO shots with basically no new information other than "everything looks good". Still waiting on endometrial biopsy results.

I guess I am just looking for positive stories, words of encouragement, similar stories, or happy endings with a long road. Also, if you have anything that worked for you to help an FET to stick. Both doctors have been really positive and my test results don't show anything wrong. I guess I am just struggling at this point.

Why did your doctor recommend against PGS testing? I had 2 fresh transfers of non-tested embryos, which both failed, those cycles only produced one embryo though, so testing didn't make sense. My first PGS normal FET worked.

[Anonymous]

I had 4 embryos, one was A, the other three were B. No PGS testing.

They transferred the A first. I miscarried at 8 weeks. Did a FET a few months later. She’s almost 3 now having “quiet time” in my room which I sincerely hope will end in a nap.

I had a chemical last summer and am 28 weeks with my last frozen embryo. I only did the trigger shot/z pack for the last one, skipped PIO and left it to fate. Here we are.

My IF was secondary. My first was born when I was 30. I’m 40 now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had 4 embryos, one was A, the other three were B. No PGS testing.

They transferred the A first. I miscarried at 8 weeks. Did a FET a few months later. She’s almost 3 now having “quiet time” in my room which I sincerely hope will end in a nap.

I had a chemical last summer and am 28 weeks with my last frozen embryo. I only did the trigger shot/z pack for the last one, skipped PIO and left it to fate. Here we are.

My IF was secondary. My first was born when I was 30. I’m 40 now.

Did you do anything different between the failed and successful transfers (#1 vs. #2 and #3 vs. #4)? Or was it just the game of luck?

[Anonymous]

Op if you want more than one child I would do another round of IVF if this FET doesn’t work out. Good luck!! Maybe also ask about an ERA?

[Anonymous]

OP here - I just got results back of an endometrial biopsy and they found chronic endometritis...My Dr. really thinks that this could be the missing piece. I started antibiotics yesterday and everything should be good to go for my next transfer!

[Anonymous]

Best of luck OP. My first transfer also failed on a normal tested embryo. About to start ERA soon.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had 4 embryos, one was A, the other three were B. No PGS testing.

They transferred the A first. I miscarried at 8 weeks. Did a FET a few months later. She’s almost 3 now having “quiet time” in my room which I sincerely hope will end in a nap.

I had a chemical last summer and am 28 weeks with my last frozen embryo. I only did the trigger shot/z pack for the last one, skipped PIO and left it to fate. Here we are.

My IF was secondary. My first was born when I was 30. I’m 40 now.

Did you do anything different between the failed and successful transfers (#1 vs. #2 and #3 vs. #4)? Or was it just the game of luck?

Nope, I did PIO with #1 and #2 and the more "natural" option for #3 and #4. Glad you got some answers, OP! Hope your next FET goes well!

[Anonymous]

I did several IUI's with 2 miscarriages and a few chemicals. Moved on to IVF and my fresh cycle failed by my frozen took and I have a 4 year old now. Prior to my IVF I took a few supplements, did fertility based acupuncture and worked out with a trainer. I was almost 41 at retrieval and almost 42 when I gave birth. I have 2 frozen embryo's and I am thinking about #2.
Wishing you lots of luck OP!

[Anonymous]

I applaud your optimism and also for doing so much research.

I think one thing to remember is that you can have a perfect embryo and a perfect womb and it still sometimes doesn’t work. That’s the hard part — if nothing’s wrong, why isn’t it working?

We were in similar shoes, having done a bunch of IUIs, and then as far as having great embryos and no known health issues (hetero couple diagnosed with unexplained infertility). We did an FET with two embryos and it failed. Did another FET with two more embryos and it failed. Ran out of embryos and did another egg retrieval. This time we did a fresh transfer and one of the embryos took.

Remembering that statistically not everyone has success (at first or ever) was a hard pill to swallow but also kept me realistic during the process. I felt strongly we were just on the wrong side of the statistic the first few rounds, we were the percentage where it simply takes longer for no (truly) definitive reason. Maybe this is a way you can think about your experience too? You seem to have everything perfect on paper, and fingers crossed you have success too on your next round.

[Anonymous]

I know this is an older thread, but expressing some gratitude for the PP. Clearly I've been reading old posts to try and find inspiration after a failed FET and cancelled FET. I've been trying to reframe how I look at recurrent disappointment in the face of positive medical predictions. We're in the Shady Grove Shared Risk program and our first FET failed and the second cycle was canceled because I didn't respond enough to the estrogen. We're going back to the drawing board and I have felt so dejected and frustrated. One of the hardest things for me is that my doctor keeps being So Optimistic. She keeps saying we just fall on the wrong side of the stats (we also did many IUIs with no luck and then had success, but MC at 8 weeks). And it makes me have this weird cognitive dissonance because she's a doctor and I want to believe her when she says the odds are good. Because it hasn't worked. So reading this framing was helpful - sometimes the dice rolls the wrong way and we've just had a lot of bad luck. Compared to others we are still pretty nascent in our journey and I know it will be a long haul.

OP - I don't have success stories to share, just support and solidarity. I hope you have had luck since you first posted!

[Anonymous]

This won’t be very helpful, but you may just be on the wrong side of the statistic at this moment.

As you well know from your previous experiences, you can be textbook perfect candidates on paper and sometimes it just doesn’t work on the first or second or later try. Keep trying with transfers. Lots of doctors prefer frozen transfers, others prefer fresh (and you’ll get tons of anecdotes for success and failure with both methods). You may just need a little more time to get into the success percentage. Good luck.