Should I call out DH when he lies to people?
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Anonymous
| I’m married to someone that exaggerates, fabricates and lies when we’re out with friends . It’s so hard to sit there and listen to it I’ve become antisocial. About 30% of what he says is true. Finances, his business, his accomplishments etc.. The best one is when he starts with how little he eats. Being that he’s about 50lbs overweight. He goes on and on how he eats so little and I’m sitting there thinking about the boxes of candy, cookies and chips that arrive weekly via Amazon. After he eats dinner he starts snacking nonstop till he falls asleep with cookie crumps in his beard. I want so bad to whip out my phone and show our friends pics of the boxes of junk food stashed in his closet and under the bed, literally! What would DC wives do? |
Anonymous
| I understand that this makes you crazy, but don’t call him out in front of your friends. |
Anonymous
| If you want a divorce, call him out. If you want to stay married, don't. |
Anonymous
| I wouldn’t call him out in front of friends, but I would absolutely tease him about the untruths when we are alone. Like next time he pulls out a bag of chips - “wow, what happened to that diet you were telling Joe and Suzy about? I thought you weren’t hardly eating anything these days!” |
Anonymous
|
We have a friend who has a wife like that. I actually consider her a friend and have gotten used to her Fabrications. I understand that she suffers from low self esteem. They have gotten better because her husband privately called her out on it.
Don't do it in public. But afterwards you need to discuss it with him and then help him figure out why. Help him get help with those issues. |
Anonymous
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Absolutely do not call him out in front of other people. That's just cruel.
This is clearly bothering you so you should talk to him in private about his fabrications. |
Anonymous
+ 1 Also, if he is 50 pounds overweight his friends probably don’t believe him. |
Anonymous
| I would be more concerned about what he's lied to you about. People who lie easily and unnecessarily are a red flag. |
Anonymous
| Either you find this charming and whimsical or you leave |
Anonymous
That, plus serious discussion about why he feels he needs to lie. His mental health warrants a visit to the psychologist. |
Anonymous
| Since no one is being social these days, perfect time to calmly talk to him. I’d tell him that when he did X (be very specific...vague references to exaggerations won’t work) on this day, it made you feel uncomfortable because it felt to you like it was an exaggeration. |
Anonymous
Maybe if the stories were funny I would. But he’s being serious. And his diet fabrication is embarrassing being that he is clearly overweight and I see the look on our friends face and it’s clearly a (this man is delusional) look. So basically I am embarrassed for him and I don’t want him looking like a fool. |
Anonymous
Yes that’s probably another reason it bothers me. |
Anonymous
It's amazing. I used to think this about my wife. She's not my ex-wife, and the level of deceit that led up to the divorce made me remember all those times where I thought, "well, gee, if she lies about something so insignficant this reflexively, how will she behave when something really matter?" I found out... |
Anonymous
| ^^ Now my ex-wife, I mean. Not "not." |