Nanny Vent
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Anonymous
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Thanks to DCUM, I started prepping my NF for CV a month ago. I stocked up on tp and sanitizer and meds. I made sure to have all the food we could need for my nanny kids. I bought some extra gross motor toys for the backyard. I bought some indoor art supplies. I researched a homeschool curriculum and bought math games and new workbooks and journals and a reading curriculum (they are 4.5yo twins) and a butterfly kit and gardening supplies so that our science lessons can be focused around nature since we’ll be playing in the yard mostly. Normally they attend preschool 5 mornings a week and their parents have regular sitters who come every Saturday and Sunday, so I cleared my schedule so that I could cover all the childcare they usually have as well as living in if it comes to that.
I work 6:30am to 8 pm 5 days a week with no break anymore and the kids have a full day of positive and enriching activities all prepped to fill that time. I make 100% of the kids’ food and do all their laundry and make some meals for the parents as well and do all the dishes for them too now that they are home all day. The parents work from home but they sleep in until about 7:30, then come downstairs and have breakfast then work but pop in throughout the day as they feel like it and then usually pop in to put the kids to bed around 7:00, and I go downstairs to do the dinner dishes and vacuum and prep for the next day. The feedback I have gotten from DB this week: Annoyance that I didn’t stock up on all the perishables he wanted (not that he asked for, just things he wanted privately in his head) Annoyance that the kids are making messes (which I always clean up. He’s just annoyed that I am letting them make a mess to begin with now that he’s here to see it) Annoyance that I load the dishwasher “wrong” Interruptions during the 20-minute break I scheduled myself when both kids watch one episode of tv so that I can lay down and rest Pushback on getting the kids to bed a little earlier since they just dropped nap and everyone is ALREADY HOME The cherry on top is that yesterday morning as I was working with one kid on journaling about the weather. We are using “inventive spelling” and the whole point is to avoid correction or rebuke and instead just focus on letting the child listen for the phonemes that make up the word so that they can build their instinctive knowledge of phonics. The kid spelled “cloudy” “CLDE” which is totally appropriate in this context. DB came in and started to correct the spelling and I said (in a low voice with my back to the kid, and neutrally with no attitude) “Hey don’t correct his spelling.” DB was FURIOUS that I was “undermining his parenting” and stormed off. He avoided me most of the day and then approached after my 13-hour shift to ask for an apology. I am so done with him. |
Anonymous
| This is the kind of frustration happening across all households right now. We are not used to being together so much and new personalities are suddenly added to the home life making things different. There will be an adjustment period. |
Anonymous
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Are you live in? Are they paying you at least $30/hour. They treat you like a slave.
These people have no business having kids. When this is over, please find a new job. You are amazing. |
Anonymous
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You sound like you are worth your weight in pure gold!
And they sound like ungrateful bosses!! If you are okay financially - I wouldn’t go in to work tmw. Unless I had to get paid! If not, just try to suck it up as long as you possibly can. This DB sounds like a jerk! 
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Anonymous
| I’m not normally live-in, but my lease is ending at the end of the month. I was going to move in with a relative but they are in a high-risk group so I told my employers that I could either move in with them at the end of the month or I could stop coming in but it wouldn’t be safe to be going back and forth. So I am also trying to move all my stuff into storage during the one hour a day I am actually home. |
Anonymous
| You are in high demand right now. I would speak to boss and let him know what’s up and that you may be out the door. |
Anonymous
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This is what happens when you do too much. You get taken fir granted.
I’m sorry you’re dealing with crappy bosses. |
Anonymous
| You know it might be a good idea for you to quit and go live with your relative for awhile. Tell the family that this dynamic is not working. You don’t have to accept being treated like a slave. |
Anonymous
| First world problems! You people are amazing. You have nothing to complain about, your lives are blessed. Rinse and repeat. |
Anonymous
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If both parents work from home why on earth are you working 6:30am - 8:00pm??!!???
All I have to say is that they better be paying overtime or you’re a real sucker. |
Anonymous
First world problems are you being stuck at home with your own children. This poor woman's story is something else entirely. 6:30-8 five days a week??? AYFKM??? |
Anonymous
| DB sounds like a DH who is working from home for the first time and is annoyed by observing firsthand the weekday domestic routine. I don't now what's worst--DBs or DHs like these! |
Anonymous
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OP, I did similar but don't live-in. 9a-5p/6p, 4x/d/wk.
Both parents work at home now. The father just smokes in his office and watches tv and the mom works out and hides in her bedroom. They don't necessarily get along and give me conflicting instructions over food, milk, etc. ex: The mom is adamant they receive milk with every meal and the dad is strongly anti-milk. The mother is more undermining now that she is home and is angry that I was resistant to taking the kids to the local museum and play places all the way through last Friday. Now that they have been out of school, they are stir-crazy despite hours and hours of playing outside and she still doesn't want any screen time. She was mad I had a nature documentary on in the background while prepping lunch. I've also spent the last few weeks being hit in the face, pinched, spit on, etc, by the children and not being allowed to discipline or correct in any way because the parents don't approve of literally anything other than indulgence and coddling and have cameras everywhere. The kids have also noticed that being destructive and hurting people gets them actual engagement and attention from the parents. The parents also had constant complaints and "corrections" such as when I put their lunches into the refrigerator because they wouldn't stop throwing it at the wall and she wanted them to be cuddled and hand fed in my lap. They are both four and know better. They also don't want to see any mess or prep in their all-white house. Normally it is cleaned before they arrive home. Most importantly, they were exposed to people returning from a hotspot this past Monday/weekend and lied about it, are now refusing to pay the last two weeks, and refused to address anything I brought up to them like nearly constantly being 30-45min late returning home without any notice or consideration for my schedule. The children then began coughing constantly, had low fevers and were generally under the weather and then the parents did, all in the space of basically 1-2 days. I left and have refused to come back. I'm much happier. I hope you leave also. I am livid and fuming that I was likely exposed. My contact with them was the only outside contact anyone in my home has had in weeks so if we are ill, it is from them. The mom's response to all of this was that if I was infected, so were they and why wouldn't I still come in and work for them... |
Anonymous
Not np. Nanny signed up for this, she knows/knew what her employers are like. Now she is whining because she has to actually do everything since they are around to see it all. Please, no sympathy here. And where does she get the time to sit on DCUM if she is actually doing everything she says she is doing? Don't answer, I so do not care. Find another job. Problem solved. |
Anonymous
| 6:30 to 8 PM with no breaks?! OP, you don't have to take this. |