ex-boyfriend issues

[Anonymous]

DD and her BF broke up 2 months back, he was trying to hu with other girls.
DD is trying to move on but he keeps trying to come back into her life, on valentine's day he posted a video and some pictures of them on his Snapchat story.
DD has messaged him directly not to post any of her pictures or try to contact her. what else can we do here?

Its been a very emotionally draining last few months.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DD and her BF broke up 2 months back, he was trying to hu with other girls.
DD is trying to move on but he keeps trying to come back into her life, on valentine's day he posted a video and some pictures of them on his Snapchat story.
DD has messaged him directly not to post any of her pictures or try to contact her. what else can we do here?

Its been a very emotionally draining last few months.

She should block and stop looking at his accounts. She cannot prevent him from posting pictures that he has. If the level of contact rises to harassment, you can address it then. Otherwise, since she has told him directly not to contact her, just block and ignore. Does she feel threatened or annoyed?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DD and her BF broke up 2 months back, he was trying to hu with other girls.
DD is trying to move on but he keeps trying to come back into her life, on valentine's day he posted a video and some pictures of them on his Snapchat story.
DD has messaged him directly not to post any of her pictures or try to contact her. what else can we do here?

Its been a very emotionally draining last few months.

She should block and stop looking at his accounts. She cannot prevent him from posting pictures that he has. If the level of contact rises to harassment, you can address it then. Otherwise, since she has told him directly not to contact her, just block and ignore. Does she feel threatened or annoyed?

+1

Also--OP, do they attend the same school? If so, does he try to see her at school? Do they have classes together so she can't avoid him?

If they don't have school together it's far easier to stop his trying to get back into her life: Block him on all social media and if he calls, she doesn't answer. But if they are archer same school (or church, or have done extracurricular they both attend), things are going to be harder. Please let us know the situation.

[Anonymous]

They do go to the same school but don't have any classes or ec's together. I do plan to request that they don't have any classes together next year,
She has blocked him but we found out about this from another source.

he responded to her saying he will not contact her or post her pictures, hopefully, it stays that way.

[Anonymous]

The only way to handle these situations is to completely ghost this boy-- block him, avoid him, don't respond to anything he does-- if it escalates to harassment, involve the school and his parents.
I've spoken with my sensitive, emotional DS13 (and hopefully it sticks when the time comes)-- when someone ends a relationship, it's over. Calling, texting, social media contacts, etc. will be creepy annoyances that will eventually be viewed as harassment and stalking, which can have serious social and legal consequences. People end relationships, and sometimes, we understand and sometimes we don't...but it only requires one party decide it's over.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They do go to the same school but don't have any classes or ec's together. I do plan to request that they don't have any classes together next year,
She has blocked him but we found out about this from another source.

he responded to her saying he will not contact her or post her pictures, hopefully, it stays that way.

I'm the PP who asked if they are at the same school. You are right to tell the school they should not be in classes together next year. Do it in writing and be sure to send copies to both the counselor's odffce and the principal's office. Take care that it does not appear you're accusing the boy of anything (he isn't stalking or harassing her at this point, correct?). But do point out that your DD's ability to focus on school will be negatively affected if they share classes. Ask to be contacted if the schedule somehow ends up with them placed in a class together (sometimes schools don't have multiple choices of class periods for certain required classes so yes, he and she could end up assigned to the same class).

Summer will provide a useful "reset" period when they aren't even passing in the hallways, and that could help cool down the emotions. Be sure DD has plenty to do this spring and summer--activities and friends (preferably not guy-crazy friends who will want to hash over what happened etc.) can help her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They do go to the same school but don't have any classes or ec's together. I do plan to request that they don't have any classes together next year,
She has blocked him but we found out about this from another source.

he responded to her saying he will not contact her or post her pictures, hopefully, it stays that way.

I'm the PP who asked if they are at the same school. You are right to tell the school they should not be in classes together next year. Do it in writing and be sure to send copies to both the counselor's odffce and the principal's office. Take care that it does not appear you're accusing the boy of anything (he isn't stalking or harassing her at this point, correct?). But do point out that your DD's ability to focus on school will be negatively affected if they share classes. Ask to be contacted if the schedule somehow ends up with them placed in a class together (sometimes schools don't have multiple choices of class periods for certain required classes so yes, he and she could end up assigned to the same class).

Summer will provide a useful "reset" period when they aren't even passing in the hallways, and that could help cool down the emotions. Be sure DD has plenty to do this spring and summer--activities and friends (preferably not guy-crazy friends who will want to hash over what happened etc.) can help her.

What??? Because he posted a Snapchat photo?!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They do go to the same school but don't have any classes or ec's together. I do plan to request that they don't have any classes together next year,
She has blocked him but we found out about this from another source.

he responded to her saying he will not contact her or post her pictures, hopefully, it stays that way.

I'm the PP who asked if they are at the same school. You are right to tell the school they should not be in classes together next year. Do it in writing and be sure to send copies to both the counselor's odffce and the principal's office. Take care that it does not appear you're accusing the boy of anything (he isn't stalking or harassing her at this point, correct?). But do point out that your DD's ability to focus on school will be negatively affected if they share classes. Ask to be contacted if the schedule somehow ends up with them placed in a class together (sometimes schools don't have multiple choices of class periods for certain required classes so yes, he and she could end up assigned to the same class).

Summer will provide a useful "reset" period when they aren't even passing in the hallways, and that could help cool down the emotions. Be sure DD has plenty to do this spring and summer--activities and friends (preferably not guy-crazy friends who will want to hash over what happened etc.) can help her.

OMG it is not up to the school guidance office to handle OP's daughter's social life! Can you imagine in EVERY student had a parent trying to dictate who their kid couldn't have classes with?
This is not their job! Your daughter needs to tell him to knock it off. If he persists, your husband needs to have a talk with the boy's dad.

[Anonymous]

He is processing what is probably his first break up. Boys have feelings too and posting a picture of an ex on his own social media is not harrassment.

She should be unfollowing him so she isn't seeing his Snapchat stories. Get off his social media.

Your daughter also needs to handle her emotions about the break-up. Do not go to the school principal or counselor. Teens break u and get back together - no one is going to create a course schedule around teen romances.

If she has told him to not contact her, that is what she can do. Outside of that she needs to be able to walk past him in the hall. They are both likely emotionally drained and trying to figure this out. It is all part of life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They do go to the same school but don't have any classes or ec's together. I do plan to request that they don't have any classes together next year,
She has blocked him but we found out about this from another source.

he responded to her saying he will not contact her or post her pictures, hopefully, it stays that way.

I'm the PP who asked if they are at the same school. You are right to tell the school they should not be in classes together next year. Do it in writing and be sure to send copies to both the counselor's odffce and the principal's office. Take care that it does not appear you're accusing the boy of anything (he isn't stalking or harassing her at this point, correct?). But do point out that your DD's ability to focus on school will be negatively affected if they share classes. Ask to be contacted if the schedule somehow ends up with them placed in a class together (sometimes schools don't have multiple choices of class periods for certain required classes so yes, he and she could end up assigned to the same class).

Summer will provide a useful "reset" period when they aren't even passing in the hallways, and that could help cool down the emotions. Be sure DD has plenty to do this spring and summer--activities and friends (preferably not guy-crazy friends who will want to hash over what happened etc.) can help her.

What??? Because he posted a Snapchat photo?!![/quote]




Np. Yes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They do go to the same school but don't have any classes or ec's together. I do plan to request that they don't have any classes together next year,
She has blocked him but we found out about this from another source.

he responded to her saying he will not contact her or post her pictures, hopefully, it stays that way.

I hope the guidance counselor tells you pound sand.

If you want to guarantee your daughter not have class with him, find another school for her. Maybe your districts allows students to transfer to other high schools in the district, or maybe you could send her to a private school. Or maybe you could home school her.

It would be completely out of line to ask that of the guidance counselor.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They do go to the same school but don't have any classes or ec's together. I do plan to request that they don't have any classes together next year,
She has blocked him but we found out about this from another source.

he responded to her saying he will not contact her or post her pictures, hopefully, it stays that way.

I'm the PP who asked if they are at the same school. You are right to tell the school they should not be in classes together next year. Do it in writing and be sure to send copies to both the counselor's odffce and the principal's office. Take care that it does not appear you're accusing the boy of anything (he isn't stalking or harassing her at this point, correct?). But do point out that your DD's ability to focus on school will be negatively affected if they share classes. Ask to be contacted if the schedule somehow ends up with them placed in a class together (sometimes schools don't have multiple choices of class periods for certain required classes so yes, he and she could end up assigned to the same class).

Summer will provide a useful "reset" period when they aren't even passing in the hallways, and that could help cool down the emotions. Be sure DD has plenty to do this spring and summer--activities and friends (preferably not guy-crazy friends who will want to hash over what happened etc.) can help her.

OMG it is not up to the school guidance office to handle OP's daughter's social life! Can you imagine in EVERY student had a parent trying to dictate who their kid couldn't have classes with?
This is not their job! Your daughter needs to tell him to knock it off. If he persists, your husband needs to have a talk with the boy's dad.

Ah, yes, let’s add another layer of toxic masculinity!

OP, I think you should monitor this; if the ex-boyfriend continues to leave her alone (in person and on social media), I don’t think you need to ask that they be separated next year. But if he violates her request, I would get the school involved. The fact that he was seeking to hook-up with other people while dating her and then posts about her on Valentine’s Day after she’s broken up with him is a red-flag to me—very manipulative/controlling.

(I have two teen/tween boys, btw.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They do go to the same school but don't have any classes or ec's together. I do plan to request that they don't have any classes together next year,
She has blocked him but we found out about this from another source.

he responded to her saying he will not contact her or post her pictures, hopefully, it stays that way.

I'm the PP who asked if they are at the same school. You are right to tell the school they should not be in classes together next year. Do it in writing and be sure to send copies to both the counselor's odffce and the principal's office. Take care that it does not appear you're accusing the boy of anything (he isn't stalking or harassing her at this point, correct?). But do point out that your DD's ability to focus on school will be negatively affected if they share classes. Ask to be contacted if the schedule somehow ends up with them placed in a class together (sometimes schools don't have multiple choices of class periods for certain required classes so yes, he and she could end up assigned to the same class).

Summer will provide a useful "reset" period when they aren't even passing in the hallways, and that could help cool down the emotions. Be sure DD has plenty to do this spring and summer--activities and friends (preferably not guy-crazy friends who will want to hash over what happened etc.) can help her.

OMG it is not up to the school guidance office to handle OP's daughter's social life! Can you imagine in EVERY student had a parent trying to dictate who their kid couldn't have classes with?
This is not their job! Your daughter needs to tell him to knock it off. If he persists, your husband needs to have a talk with the boy's dad.

Ah, yes, let’s add another layer of toxic masculinity!

OP, I think you should monitor this; if the ex-boyfriend continues to leave her alone (in person and on social media), I don’t think you need to ask that they be separated next year. But if he violates her request, I would get the school involved. The fact that he was seeking to hook-up with other people while dating her and then posts about her on Valentine’s Day after she’s broken up with him is a red-flag to me—very manipulative/controlling.

(I have two teen/tween boys, btw.)

Ah yes, playing the old "all males are evil" card! Once I see that, there's no need to read the rest of your post, everything you say is obviously pure garbage!