DH wants a third. I’m not sure.

[Anonymous]

Our first was a happy accident in our mid 20s but it took a long time for us to adjust. We had our second, now a toddler, when we were actually ready for kids. Now DH really wants another. He brings it up literally every day. We both work full time and then some. Neither of us have any desire to dial back professionally (but he is a true partner on kid stuff). I am ambivalent about another kid, but the expenses are so crazy that I hesitate (especially since our eldest is in a private school). I just turned 35. WWYD?

[Anonymous]

Have a third. And reconsider public school (or moving).

[Anonymous]

you are so young. do it now.

[Anonymous]

Never regretted our third. Love love love her. Moved our kids to public.

[Anonymous]

So your older child is around age 9-11, and your younger child is how old?

[Anonymous]

Wow, this thread is not nearly as exciting as I thought it would be from the title.

[Anonymous]

My husband wants a third too, except our kids are 3 and 1 and I'm almost 40. I feel a little bad but not bad enough to actually suffer through pregnancy again... hard pass!

[Anonymous]

What would make it ok or desirable for you? Make a list of circumstances under which you would like a third and then discuss/see if it's doable.

[Anonymous]

Nope.

Stick with your gut.

[Anonymous]

You each have a vote but your’s is more important. I had my third at 35 and I can’t imagine life without her. Yes, money is an issue and we debated it but my husband simply said we’ll figure it out.

[Anonymous]

If you’re it sure then the answer is no. Both of you need to be sure.

[Anonymous]

I was in the same position, but our kids were 3 & 1 and I was 36. Gave in and haven't regretted it for a second.

[Anonymous]

Don’t do it if you don’t really want it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don’t do it if you don’t really want it.

This. Can't believe the people telling you to do it when you are ambivalent. When women write saying they want a third but their husband doesn't, everyone says that both people have to be fully on board. Same goes here.

[Anonymous]

I really wanted a third. DH was ambivalent. He finally agreed. While we're both glad we have the third, I think it would have been/would be easier if we'd both been gung-ho about it. If I'd been the less excited party, I would say hard pass. My third pregnancy was by far my hardest, and that's been the norm among my many friends with 3+.