Do you condone cheating? Do you help your kids?

Anonymous
Was at a dinner party last night where we were the only couple not bragging about all the clever ways our kids cheat or sharing tips. I was floored. I guess I still am. I’ve known most of these parents since our kids were in elementary school together. I never would have guessed this about any of them. One mom said it’s what “our kids” have to do to get into college. I didn’t realize what she meant until later on the way home when my wife pointed out she meant white kids. I just... I’m reevaluating everything about these people.

I straight up asked my kids if they’ve ever cheated and both said no but could name 10 different ways they could and others do. I mean, if it’s common knowledge, do teachers even try combat it?
Anonymous
Were the tactics the parents listed the same as the ones your kids named?
Anonymous
That is depressing. Even more so when the kids get caught in college or work and get expelled/fired. So sad these parents aren't teaching their kids self respect. Any way to diminish contact with these hollow people?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:That is depressing. Even more so when the kids get caught in college or work and get expelled/fired. So sad these parents aren't teaching their kids self respect. Any way to diminish contact with these hollow people?

Most students cheat in one way or another, with certain forms being legalized ... just like bribery (donating tens of thousands to teachers’ funds).
Anonymous
I’ve never encouraged my kids to cheat. We have one in high school. Two in college. Two college grads. I don’t know any parents who would encourage their children to cheat. It’s just not who we are.
Anonymous
Years ago when I was an exchange student in a German high school, I watched the crazy ways the 11th graders cheated on exams. One kid took a pencil, sawed it in half, and wrote formulas in tiny script on the inside.

It had never occurred to me to cheat like that in my own (rigorous) high school. Grades were important, but not THAT important.

Also, we didn't have the kind of tests where you could cheat easily like that. Our tests were often open book!

Anyhow, no, I'm not aware that kids in our high school are cheating very much.
Anonymous
PP again, I will admit to looking the other way if I learn that they are faking science fair experiment results but that's because I f*#%# hate science fair.
Anonymous
My son begged me to redshirt him and I said no. But most people I know are willing to cheat the system this way.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I’ve never encouraged my kids to cheat. We have one in high school. Two in college. Two college grads. I don’t know any parents who would encourage their children to cheat. It’s just not who we are.


+1
How do you prevent your kid from cheating altogether if you condone academic cheating? Is it ok to shoplift? Is it ok to lie on your resume? Is it ok to take credit for someone else's ideas? Is it ok to cheat on a spouse?
Anonymous
Are they 1st gen Asian because cheating is acceptable in some cultures just like bribery is just part of life in some cultures.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:My son begged me to redshirt him and I said no. But most people I know are willing to cheat the system this way.


I have not yet understood the concept of redshirting? Why? Why deliberately deprive him from learning for one whole year?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Were the tactics the parents listed the same as the ones your kids named?


Some overlapped, yes.

Big ones seemed to be technology related. Using AirPods, putting the formulas in graphing calculators, and using Apple watches.

Some were things I remember kids doing when I was in school like writing formulas on the desk. There are some teachers who never change their tests so kids will sell their old tests.
Anonymous
I wrote formulas on the back of my calculator in high school. Everyone did. Not sure that makes me a terrible person. I got through college just fine.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My son begged me to redshirt him and I said no. But most people I know are willing to cheat the system this way.


I have not yet understood the concept of redshirting? Why? Why deliberately deprive him from learning for one whole year?


They are not denied learning they just repeat a year.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:My son begged me to redshirt him and I said no. But most people I know are willing to cheat the system this way.


How is it cheating the system. The parental waiver is built into the law - at least in VA. The system is designed that way because sometimes kids are not ready. It’s actually really sad that your kid begged you to redshirt and you ignored him. You would have been well within your rights as a parent to do so.
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