Best place to meet men when you're over 30?

[Anonymous]

Where is the best place to meet men when you're over 30 that actually works besides dating apps?

[Anonymous]

DH and I met as neighbors. We both lived in the same garden-style apartments that were very Melrose Place, in the sense that neighbors frequently gathered in outdoor common areas to grill, drink beer, socialize, etc.

So, I would say through mutual friends. We were early 30's, though -- now, at 40, it would be much more difficult to meet through mutual friends as most are paired off--we only have a handful of single friends.

[Anonymous]

All my friends are married.

Try the gym. Always lots of men there.

[Anonymous]

I would like to know too so I can avoid those places and keep meeting women in their 20s.

[Lonely_Sojourner]

Anonymous wrote:All my friends are married.

Try the gym. Always lots of men there.

Guy here... Would a woman not find it creepy to be approached at a gym? While I have seen many great-looking ladies at my gym, I have only admired from afar and never pursued such out of respect... Am I too old-school?

[Anonymous]

38, here is where I always see and meet men that approach me

- walking dogs
- grocery store
- Home Depot
- beer festivals
- sports bars when local games are on
- apartment buildings (single men in 30s rent)

But my most popular place for meeting single men?
A regular restaurant, but sit at the bar/counter... and do it during a weeknight. We are both off of work, too tired to cook, like the same dish, start up convo. Chances are they’re local if they’re eating at Cafe Asia at 7pm on a Tuesday.

[Anonymous]

Lonely_Sojourner wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All my friends are married.

Try the gym. Always lots of men there.

Guy here... Would a woman not find it creepy to be approached at a gym? While I have seen many great-looking ladies at my gym, I have only admired from afar and never pursued such out of respect... Am I too old-school?

Gym is tricky. I usually see the same people at the gym, which could be awkward if things didn't go that well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Lonely_Sojourner wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All my friends are married.

Try the gym. Always lots of men there.

Guy here... Would a woman not find it creepy to be approached at a gym? While I have seen many great-looking ladies at my gym, I have only admired from afar and never pursued such out of respect... Am I too old-school?

Gym is tricky. I usually see the same people at the gym, which could be awkward if things didn't go that well.

It is only "creepy" to approach at the gym (or anywhere else) if you are unattractive and lack flirting skills.

It has never been "awkward" for me when gym dates didn't work out. Yeah, I noticed that some of them stopped coming to the gym, but that meant they had a problem, not me. Or they just got lazy, or moved away, who even knows.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Lonely_Sojourner wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All my friends are married.

Try the gym. Always lots of men there.

Guy here... Would a woman not find it creepy to be approached at a gym? While I have seen many great-looking ladies at my gym, I have only admired from afar and never pursued such out of respect... Am I too old-school?

Gym is tricky. I usually see the same people at the gym, which could be awkward if things didn't go that well.

It is only "creepy" to approach at the gym (or anywhere else) if you are unattractive and lack flirting skills.

It has never been "awkward" for me when gym dates didn't work out. Yeah, I noticed that some of them stopped coming to the gym, but that meant they had a problem, not me. Or they just got lazy, or moved away, who even knows.

"It's not awkward for me when things don't work out because for some reason all my exes move out of state and change their names!"

[Lonely_Sojourner]

Anonymous wrote:38, here is where I always see and meet men that approach me

- walking dogs
- grocery store
- Home Depot
- beer festivals
- sports bars when local games are on
- apartment buildings (single men in 30s rent)

But my most popular place for meeting single men?
A regular restaurant, but sit at the bar/counter... and do it during a weeknight. We are both off of work, too tired to cook, like the same dish, start up convo. Chances are they’re local if they’re eating at Cafe Asia at 7pm on a Tuesday.

Thank you for the detailed response. Clearly, I need to broaden my dating venues to accommodate your suggestions. Being from the South, I tend to be a bit of an old-fashion type. Further, being widowed doesn't help either...

[Anonymous]

My brother does uber eats and says they’re all at home ordering in too

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My brother does uber eats and says they’re all at home ordering in too

Pro tip: Become an Uber eats driver

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would like to know too so I can avoid those places and keep meeting women in their 20s.

In their 20s, they’re all at clubs and dive bars.

[Anonymous]

have dinner at the bar of a nice restaurant

[Anonymous]

I used match.com last year.

Bars, etc. -- no. I had tried to meet in person--volunteering, etc. But it is really tough because many of the activities have mostly women.

Also, my experience is that these dayssome good men can be afraid to approach women for fear that they are acting like creeps or will be accused of acting inappropriately.

Dating websites/apps have downsides, but lots of plus sides. One plus side is that you know if you meet that way, it is someone at least theoretically interested in meeting someone. Everyone is there for the same reason.

I DREADED online dating, but I ended up really finding it very helpful. I'm a woman in her 40s.