3rd baby

[Anonymous]

Has anyone ever been on the fence about a third baby with older children? Like starting over? Did you end up trying or just sticking with 2? Share your experience please!

[Anonymous]

As has been discussed here 2x a week for 10 years, many people felt conflicted. If they went for it they were later frustrated by the hassle of trying to work a household of older kids who can do more and want to do more with the schedule of a baby. People are pulled too thin and there’s spousal resentment that the previously smooth life was disrupted by a third baby.

Or, they had the third baby and everyone loves third baby and they can’t imagine life without third baby and nobody minds one parent doing fun stuff with older ones while other parent sits home with third baby. Those are your options.

[Anonymous]

You forgot the other two options:

- You don’t end up having a third baby and and full of regret (possibly sowing resentment in your marriage) and you wistfully look at families with 3+ kids

- You don’t end up having a third and as life goes on you are so freaking grateful you only have two children to deal with on top of every other life stressor

[Anonymous]

This is great - we should do a poll to resolve this issue! Everyone vote! (You think I am kidding, but I am not - what better way than to see if there is a majority result)

A - If they went for it they were later frustrated by the hassle of trying to work a household of older kids who can do more and want to do more with the schedule of a baby. People are pulled too thin and there’s spousal resentment that the previously smooth life was disrupted by a third baby.

B- they had the third baby and everyone loves third baby and they can’t imagine life without third baby and nobody minds one parent doing fun stuff with older ones while other parent sits home with third baby. Those are your options.

C - You don’t end up having a third baby and and full of regret (possibly sowing resentment in your marriage) and you wistfully look at families with 3+ kids

D - You don’t end up having a third and as life goes on you are so freaking grateful you only have two children to deal with on top of every other life stressor

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As has been discussed here 2x a week for 10 years, many people felt conflicted. If they went for it they were later frustrated by the hassle of trying to work a household of older kids who can do more and want to do more with the schedule of a baby. People are pulled too thin and there’s spousal resentment that the previously smooth life was disrupted by a third baby.

Or, they had the third baby and everyone loves third baby and they can’t imagine life without third baby and nobody minds one parent doing fun stuff with older ones while other parent sits home with third baby. Those are your options.

End thread!

[Anonymous]

B.

[Anonymous]

I am in the "B" category. We loved the third so much we had a fourth and we love her even more than the third. Just kidding. Kind of.

I had two kids when I was a teenager, and then when I was older and more .... in a place to be a parent, had the third and fourth kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Has anyone ever been on the fence about a third baby with older children? Like starting over? Did you end up trying or just sticking with 2? Share your experience please!

Would be interesting to ask in Over fifty forum, to see from different perspective.

[Anonymous]

B-ish. Try not to sit at home as much but tag along with the fun older kid stuff with baby in tow. Agree with PP, had a 4th, love them more than the 3rd. Not the child themselves, but their fit in the family, etc. 3rd almost broke us but so glad we had another to complete the fam.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is great - we should do a poll to resolve this issue! Everyone vote! (You think I am kidding, but I am not - what better way than to see if there is a majority result)

A - If they went for it they were later frustrated by the hassle of trying to work a household of older kids who can do more and want to do more with the schedule of a baby. People are pulled too thin and there’s spousal resentment that the previously smooth life was disrupted by a third baby.

B- they had the third baby and everyone loves third baby and they can’t imagine life without third baby and nobody minds one parent doing fun stuff with older ones while other parent sits home with third baby. Those are your options.

C - You don’t end up having a third baby and and full of regret (possibly sowing resentment in your marriage) and you wistfully look at families with 3+ kids and sometimes you start nasty threads on anonymous internet forums about how no one should have three kids if they aren't willing to make their kids the Center of the Universe, forever and ever, amen

D - You don’t end up having a third and as life goes on you are so freaking grateful you only have two children to deal with on top of every other life stressor

Slight amendment

[Anonymous]

Team D allllllll the way

[Anonymous]

this website has a search function

[Anonymous]

B. Also ended up having a fourth.

I don’t remember being nearly as resentful about hanging out with baby #3 as I was about hanging out with baby #2. I think with the second I thought that DH and I would take turns more with toddler and baby, and I was resentful that I always seemed stuck with the baby. With #3, I think I was just glad for the break from the two older two in order to cuddle with the baby.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Team D allllllll the way

Yup, D here, too. So glad we quit while we were ahead!!!

[Anonymous]

You forgot E and F: what if I reeeeally want a third (or fifth) and husband does not, and we end up having another and later divorcing? Or, we end up not having another, and I end up being resentful and depressed over feeling that our family is incomplete??