Working parent fail — can anyone relate?

[Anonymous]

Just missed my kindergartener’s graduation for a conference abroad, and bombed the presentation. There’s been a lot going on this month as my youngest was hospitalized. Before I left I got some really good news from work but I guess there are going to be some days where you feel you just failed and it sucks because you also missed things at home. Anyone else have similar experiences? Feeling really bummed right now so please no WOHM haters.

[Anonymous]

Don’t sweat it, op. My kids got home from camp at 5 yesterday. I thought my phone was muted in the rather large conference call. It wasn’t. Everyone knows what they had for snack and that they were heading out to play with Charlotte if mom said it was ok.

Life is life. Sometimes you win. Sometimes you don’t. It’s what keeps us humble.

[Anonymous]

Don't be so hard on yourself!

[Anonymous]

Ugh I had a work from home day where my kid talked during the quick second where I was un muted. Of course you are not allowed to have kids at home when working.

I was also the only mother who didn’t show up at the Mother’s day celebration at school (I didn’t realize it was an elaborate thing) so I didn’t take off. My husband told me about how nice it was like 4 times.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ugh I had a work from home day where my kid talked during the quick second where I was un muted. Of course you are not allowed to have kids at home when working.

I was also the only mother who didn’t show up at the Mother’s day celebration at school (I didn’t realize it was an elaborate thing) so I didn’t take off. My husband told me about how nice it was like 4 times.

I hate when they don’t specify which events are ones that EVERYONE usually attends. From the descriptions, I have to guess if going will be a waste of PTO or skipping will make my kid cry because everyone else’s mom was there.

[Anonymous]

Thanks guys. You’re right, I just gotta brush it off.

I am the only speaker here with young kids so it helps to talk to people who get it...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ugh I had a work from home day where my kid talked during the quick second where I was un muted. Of course you are not allowed to have kids at home when working.

I was also the only mother who didn’t show up at the Mother’s day celebration at school (I didn’t realize it was an elaborate thing) so I didn’t take off. My husband told me about how nice it was like 4 times.

Nope, you weren’t the only one because I wasn’t there either. I did make it there for the early Father’s Day celebration in April though, filling in for DH who couldn’t make it. I definitely wasn’t the only mom there that day, but I bet very few of the dad’s who missed it are still beating themselves up about it like we are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ugh I had a work from home day where my kid talked during the quick second where I was un muted. Of course you are not allowed to have kids at home when working.

I was also the only mother who didn’t show up at the Mother’s day celebration at school (I didn’t realize it was an elaborate thing) so I didn’t take off. My husband told me about how nice it was like 4 times.

I hate when they don’t specify which events are ones that EVERYONE usually attends. From the descriptions, I have to guess if going will be a waste of PTO or skipping will make my kid cry because everyone else’s mom was there.

+1

I have taken off for non-events and missed big things because there is no differentiation on the schedule. Throw me a bone and give me a hint!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ugh I had a work from home day where my kid talked during the quick second where I was un muted. Of course you are not allowed to have kids at home when working.

I was also the only mother who didn’t show up at the Mother’s day celebration at school (I didn’t realize it was an elaborate thing) so I didn’t take off. My husband told me about how nice it was like 4 times.

Nope, you weren’t the only one because I wasn’t there either. I did make it there for the early Father’s Day celebration in April though, filling in for DH who couldn’t make it. I definitely wasn’t the only mom there that day, but I bet very few of the dad’s who missed it are still beating themselves up about it like we are.

+1 I didn't even remember about my kid's mother's day celebration at preschool. Another mom sent me pictures of my kid smiling with the teacher and holding up an I love you mom sign. You're doing the best you can OP and it's ok. It's all small stuff.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ugh I had a work from home day where my kid talked during the quick second where I was un muted. Of course you are not allowed to have kids at home when working.

I was also the only mother who didn’t show up at the Mother’s day celebration at school (I didn’t realize it was an elaborate thing) so I didn’t take off. My husband told me about how nice it was like 4 times.

I hate when they don’t specify which events are ones that EVERYONE usually attends. From the descriptions, I have to guess if going will be a waste of PTO or skipping will make my kid cry because everyone else’s mom was there.

All of them. Even the "preschool graduation" ceremony when your kid is 3 and NOT graduating. Sigh.

[Anonymous]

I missed my son’s preschool graduation last year because I had just started a new job that week and had already pushed my start date back to accommodate a maternity leave. It felt crappy sitting around a mostly empty office (Friday in the summer) doing nothing important while missing a big event for my kid. But I think it bothered me way more than him. I think we moms are harder on ourselves than the kids are!

[Anonymous]

DH is deployed and I could not get to my son’s preK graduation. His former nanny (now a close family friend) was there and made it a big deal for my son. So everything was fine... except two days later, three mothers made it a point to tell me how wonderful our former nanny was and how great it is that my son has “someone he can rely on”. Talk about a knife in my heart.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DH is deployed and I could not get to my son’s preK graduation. His former nanny (now a close family friend) was there and made it a big deal for my son. So everything was fine... except two days later, three mothers made it a point to tell me how wonderful our former nanny was and how great it is that my son has “someone he can rely on”. Talk about a knife in my heart.

Ugh what a dreadful thing to say to you. Probably didn’t come out how they meant, but still!

[Anonymous]

It doesn’t matter what your situation, there will always be fails and always be great things about your situation. I save my self recrimination for those times when I don’t do my best in my role.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH is deployed and I could not get to my son’s preK graduation. His former nanny (now a close family friend) was there and made it a big deal for my son. So everything was fine... except two days later, three mothers made it a point to tell me how wonderful our former nanny was and how great it is that my son has “someone he can rely on”. Talk about a knife in my heart.

Ugh what a dreadful thing to say to you. Probably didn’t come out how they meant, but still!

Seriously - ouch!