Reproductive coercion and partner violence: implications for clinical assessment of unintended pregn
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Anonymous
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What is reproductive coercion:
"reproductive coercion, defined as male partners’ attempts to promote pregnancy in their female partners through verbal pressure and threats to become pregnant (pregnancy coercion), direct interference with contraception (birth-control sabotage), and threats and coercion related to pregnancy continuation or termination (control of pregnancy outcomes). " How do men do it: 1. Holes in condoms 2. Throwing, hiding, or tampering with your pills 3. Taking off condom mid way sex 3. Ripping off patches 4. Some can pull the string on iuds (didn't realize this until today.) 5. General verbal and emotional pressure 6. Condom refusal. He will say if you are on birth control, you don't have to use condoms. Sometimes they just want raw sex for pleasure. But sometimes he is trying to impregnant you. He will say he is clean and that condoms mean you don't trust them. Or that you are cheating. Why men try to trap women with a pregnancy 1. to prolong a relationship 2. To force a marriage 3. Sabotage her career and financial goals and trajectory 4. He thinks having a baby mamma or baby mammas makes him seem masculine and hypersexual 5. He wants to sabotage the womans dating options--- all things equal a childfree women or man is more attractive on the dating market 6. Control you. If he gets custody he will be in your life forever, and now he can abuse you for a minimum of 18 years. 7. He gets free(or reduced) housing and food-- this is more common with the black community. A lot of men know a childfree woman will have less guilt kicking out a boyfriend. But not many woman want the father of her child to be homeless. Some hobosexuals/bums can collect mutliple baby mammas and secure housing 8. He thinks you will be more desperate and available for sex. He thinks you will permanently be in his sex roster. How to avoid being a target: 1. Hide your birth control -- even if you trust him 2. Look into going for IUDs and implants over pills 3. Always wear a condom even if you are on birth control. Matter of fact don't tell him you are on the pill/implanted. Just tell him you are allergic. This is not being dishonest as no person is entitled to know what medication you are on. That is between you and your doctor. 4. Avoid men who seem jealous or resentful of your career and life prospects. These men want to knock you down a peg or 5 5. Watch out for men that "joke" about how you will create beautiful kids together before even discussing marriage. 6. Use more than one form of birth control. 7. Remind him that removing a condom("stealthing") is rape and that you are not afraid of reporting him or any man who does it. 8. Drop men or check men that discuss having children before marriage. This is not acceptable. And some of these men actually are planning to run away the minute you get pregnant. It is a funny game to these men. They want you to be left with the "ball" and go into poverty and strife. Tell these men that having a baby is a bigger commitment than marriage. It is easier to sue for child support from an ex husband than a boyfriend. Not to mention you at least can go for alimony if not for child support. |
Anonymous
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Sorry forgot the links:
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3282154/ https://www.whijournal.com/article/S1049-3867(17)30414-0/fulltext |
Anonymous
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Sorry forgot the links:
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3282154/ https://www.whijournal.com/article/S1049-3867(17)30414-0/fulltext |
Anonymous
| Whats your point? I agree this is terrible, but not sure what your point is |
Anonymous
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An interesting part of the study :
Black and White women noticeably differed in how they described men's and women's roles in sexual health decision making. Black women described a greater reliance on male partners in contraceptive decision making relative to White women, which may facilitate or normalize RC behavior. Reliance and transfer of power may be hinged on low sex ratios among Blacks relative to other racial/ethnic groups that encourage competing sexual partnerships (Adimora et al., 2013). Also discussed was subfertility stated by Black men. Additional research should include the perspectives of men and women and begin to distinguish medically diagnosed infertility from deception and lack of reproductive health knowledge. Gender Roles in Reproductive Decision Making Sex scripts or norms around reproductive responsibility varied by race/ethnicity in the context of IPV and sexual experiences. Among Black women, RC and dependency on male partners to decide on pregnancy prevention and provide financial support influenced attitudes about pregnancy. White women discussed hopelessness and responsibility of the female partner to prevent pregnancy. In the following narratives, two Black women described contrasting influences of their male partner's financial stability in their acceptance of becoming pregnant. First, in the presence of RC, a 27-year-old Black woman described, “He was the one who wanted a kid. He actually threw my birth control away…I knew there was a possibility of getting pregnant but I wasn't expecting to get pregnant because I wasn't ready at that age. But he was there to provide and everything so I didn't have to worry about my kid not being taken care of or anything like that.” When another women, age 18, was asked about the use of contraception at first sex she replied, “None, I didn't do anything, that was just all him. I never had sex—first time was just, okay, alright, this is something new, I guess I'll try. But I guess we used the pullout method, or—one day he told me he did. I was like why would you—why do you want me—why do you want this [pregnancy]? I don't have a job; you're not even working, like” (age 18). One 27-year-old Black woman discussed her desire to become pregnant and how this affected her perceptions regarding male responsibility for condom use: He knew the consequences, he slipped up and didn't pull out twice and we went to the pharmacy and he got me the, whatever the pill… The third time I told him, no I'm not doing that because I want a kid, you already got a kid,… So he's responsible, he got a good job. Like he's responsible enough to take care of his responsibilities, but he just didn't want another kid. So if he ever does it again, I ain't getting the pill, I want a kid, I'm getting old. She later described, “So I always let it be known, if you don't wanna use protection, if that's what we decide to do, just know if I end up getting pregnant, that's your responsibility.” None of the White participants mentioned this approach to pregnancy. Instead, White women described experiences of UIP in relation to hopelessness, lack of control to enact reproductive and sexual decision making, and the responsibility of the female partner to prevent pregnancy. One White woman said that severe abuse that resulted in hopelessness shaped her destiny. In response to learning that she was raped by her partner while sleeping, she described, “I just accepted that this is my destiny to be a wife, mother, whatever. I feel like I was kind of brainwashed. If it would have happened, I don't think I would have cared. I mean I—I didn't think much about having a future” (age 25). When asked how she feels when condoms are not used another woman added, “It doesn't really bother me but I know I probably should use it [condom] because he does have 2 kids. He has 2 kids already, and then, I don't know if like—what our relationship will be like later on down the line, but that would be kind of messed up on my part to just be irresponsible and have a kid” (age 24). |
Anonymous
Of course, women never trick their partners into impregnating them. 
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Anonymous
What does this have to do with anything? Go start your own thread. |
Anonymous
I'm the OP here, everyone is free to contribute. |
Anonymous
| This is aimed at a totally different demographic than DCUM. |
Anonymous
| I have a family member in her 40s who went through this with her ex husband. He has some PTSD issues from the military. She was fresh off finally getting her Master's degree that led to a promotion. He was having trouble keeping a job because he refused to stay steady with his medications. During every family function he would make comments about getting her pregnant. She told me he used emotional tactics too, like saying she wouldn't want a baby with him because he's damaged. He would also say his dream was to be a father and how it could turn his life around. My family member refused because he would not get long term help for his issues. They divorced a few years ago. Fast forward to now, and he has a little boy. He did not marry the mother and frequently disappears. The mother has had to reach out to our family when she can't find him, because he used to be close to us. My family member is engaged now, and she always says she is glad she didn't have a baby with the first husband. |
Anonymous
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I actually found this report a month or some time ago and I forgot to share it. I was looking at the Wikipedia article on Reproductive Coercion when I came across this interesting piece of information. The actual NISVS report the article cites is from 2010, but it's the most recent survey that's been completed, so it's all we have to work with.
If you look at the prevalence section of the article or page 58 of the NISVS report, you can see that Approximately 8.6% (or an estimated 10.3 million) of women in the United States reported ever having an intimate partner who tried to get them pregnant when they did not want to, or refused to use a condom, with 4.8% having had an intimate partner who tried to get them pregnant when they did not want to, and 6.7% having had an intimate partner who refused to wear a condom Where as Approximately 10.4% (or an estimated 11.7 million) of men in the United States reported ever having an intimate partner who tried to get pregnant when they did not want to or tried to stop them from using birth control, with 8.7% having had an intimate partner who tried to get pregnant when they did not want to or tried to stop them from using birth control and 3.8% having had an intimate partner who refused to wear a condom While men are more likely to report that an intimate partner tried to get pregnant when they did not want or tried to stop them from using birth control, women were around 1.5x more likely to report an intimate partner who refused to wear a condom. I read this report maybe dozens of times to make sure I didn't misinterpret it, but it seems to be what it is. This is pretty alarming because if you google this, you find shit like this where not only are there no articles about it happening to men, most of the results on the page aren't even gender neutral; they link to articles describing exactly how it's related to the domestic abuse of women. In fact, there is actually another result that presents itself as "What You Need to Know About Reproductive Coercion"(hint: it's metadata excerpt suggest it's only about women) that didn't even fit on my screenshot. One of those results that's in the initial screenshot even includes a gendered definition of reproductive coercion, which non-surprisingly, is featured in a report published by the NCAV or the "National Coalition Against Domestic Violence." Doesn't seem like they're all that committed to ending Domestic Violence to me. It's sort of disheartening to see time and time again male victims of abuse pushed aside and their experiences marginalized by the very same people who are supposed to help them. While it's undeniably true that teenage girls and women have a greater risk towards reproductive coercion, it's a little sad there is no media or no awareness for male victims of the same issue. On this site alone, I have witnessed so called "progressives" discard information such as this as an "attempt by MRAs to paint all women as liars, batshit crazy, or greedy bitches." While I can't really dispute that it's being done(as apparent by their use of the crude term 'sperm-jacking'), it's still ridiculous this point has been completely thrown out and deemed by some as insignificant. To me, it's not necessarily all that important that more men reported this issue than women, it's the disparity in attention and awareness that's really concerning. This is because it fits a preexisting trend where men have received the short end of the stick when it comes to the emotional and financial support for their issues not only on an interpersonal scale, but a societal scale as well. Domestic violence shelters, homeless shelters, rape and abuse hotlines, you name it; outlets for helping male abuse victims are often more of a joke than their female counterparts(which are also constantly understaffed and under equipped). I also have to mention the fact that society is progressing towards training social workers to identify traits of abuse so it's very important that people bring awareness to this. Often in some areas of Reddit, men's reproductive control is reduced to "lol wear a condom everything else is your fault." I really hope that shit doesn't make it's way here, as this place is the closest thing us guys have to a paragon of awareness for men's issues. I'm not making a point for financial abortion either; it's just super annoying seeing that bullshit everywhere because it's an incredibly stupid point to make. If things were that easy the world would be in a lot better shape than it is now. *Please note the [US] tag in the title. The linked information is most likely only relevant to the U.S, but it's still possible it can for other countries as well. There’s a pretty big reddit thread on this as well: https://www.reddit.com/r/MensLib/comments/6lwq9r/usmore_men_reported_as_victims_of_reproductive/ |
Anonymous
That was my thought as well. How many professional guys are trying to get a woman pregnant and be on the hook for child support? I could maybe see this being a thing for judgment proof individuals but even then I'm not so sure. Knocking someone up is generally up there as one of the worst possible outcomes for a guy. |
Anonymous
Upper class men do it to keep an abused wife from leaving. Especially if she got to the point that other kids were all in school and she could work FTOH without daycare costs. |
Anonymous
| OP clearly has an agenda but has presented so cryptically that no one but he/she understands wtf he/she is talking about. |
Anonymous
Here's one more for the "How to avoid" list.. Wear a Chastity Belt. |